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Mosquito

Mosquito

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Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Brilliantly bad critter flick
Review: "Mosquito" is the type of film that not only hits you over the head with its sheer badness; it continues to beat you after you have lost consciousness. The whole thing is an atrocity, a roaring, shrieking train wreck of a film that even the hardiest souls will have a tough time taking seriously. Everything fails on a metatectonic level with this movie: the acting, the plot, the pacing, most of the special effects, and everything else you have come to associate with a motion picture. "Mosquito" is such a miserable movie that you will draw flies if you don't quit gaping at the disaster unfolding onscreen. Have I made myself clear about the total ineptness of this movie yet? Good, because I now need to say watching "Mosquito" is a lot of fun for the lover of trash cinema. Why? Because the whole thing is an atrocity, a roaring, shrieking train wreck of a film that even the hardiest souls will have a tough time taking seriously. Because everything fails on a metatectonic level with this movie: the acting, the plot, the pacing, most of the special effects, and everything else you have come to associate with a motion picture. Because "Mosquito" is such a miserable movie that you will draw flies if you don't quit gaping at the disaster unfolding onscreen. And Gunnar Hansen plays one of the primary characters.

"Mosquito" begins with the crash landing of an extraterrestrial object from space. The craft splashes down in a swamp with disastrous results for the surrounding ecosystem. Well, at least it is for the mosquitoes since it seems only these nasty little buggers suffer any ill effects from the spaceship. The skeeters soon grow to frighteningly huge proportions although no one in the area knows about this impending disaster as of yet. We soon meet four disparate groups of people that we just know will wind up together in the end. There are two young folks--a man and his girlfriend--driving out to a local recreation area so the girl can assume her post as a park ranger. There is an idiotic, whiny male ranger at the park who may rank as one of the worst actors in cinematic history. How do we know he is an idiot? Because he sprays the park for mosquitoes without worrying about poisoning the campers. Somewhere down the road three militia guys with a bag full of money and a bad attitude have a nasty encounter with a giant mosquito in the forest. After suffering a casualty, the two survivors attempt to get out of the area at all costs. Finally, some guy checking out a report of a falling meteor in the area provides the scientific information we need to understand how giant mosquitoes could possibly exist--not really, of course, but he's there to do what he can.

The ravenous mosquitoes make quick work of any people they find out in the open with the exception of our gang of heroes, who soon come together to fight for their lives. They attempt to flee from the malevolent skeeters in an RV, attempt to run from them through a sewer drain, and attempt to escape by barricading themselves in an abandoned house. Predictably, the mosquitoes manage to thin the herd along the way, with a few of our stalwart souls collapsing under the onslaught of the winged hordes as the various methods adopted to deal with the rascals fail miserably. Victims of the mosquitoes tend to shrivel up at an alarming rate, probably due to the rather rapid blood loss accompanying a bite. The idea of falling prey to the mosquitoes is so bad that it requires Gunnar Hansen's character to ally himself with people he doesn't really trust, and to later heft a chainsaw in a futile attempt to rescue one of his imperiled companions. Strange events make for strange bedfellows, apparently. It is almost redundant to say that the conclusion involves a final confrontation with the mutated mosquitoes, one that requires personal sacrifice if our heroes are to save the world.

The flaws of "Mosquito" are as numerous as, say, a swarm of mosquitoes. All of the actors hired for the production uniformly tank in their respective roles, but John Reneaud as the thickheaded ranger Tony is arguably the worst actor in the world. He spends every scene complaining and whining about the situation, so much so that I fervently prayed he would fall victim to the mosquitoes in an especially gruesome fashion. Reneaud is the worst actor in a cast of painfully wooden thespians. Gunnar Hansen, for example, looks awfully stiff in his role as Earl, one of the militia guys with a secret. Put these terrible performances next to the cheesy effects, the gory attack sequences, the ham handed script, and you have a movie sure to alienate most of the viewing audience. "Mosquito" did not alienate me; I liked the movie overall and laughed repeatedly at the antics unfolding onscreen. This one has "so bad it is good" written all over it.

I wouldn't be surprised at all if the movie attained cult classic status. I do know it appears on basic cable from time to time, so apparently there is an audience out there for this type of garbage. The biggest questions I had as the final credits rolled concerned the alien spacecraft. Whatever happened to the ship? Moreover, why would the Air Force send out one guy with experience about meteorites to investigate what is probably the biggest event in the history of the human race? Doesn't the U.S.A.F. have fancy radar and satellite systems designed to detect foreign objects from space? As I wondered about these questions, I realized I was wasting my time. Don't question, just simply sit back and enjoy this immensely entertaining low budget junk heap.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Brilliantly bad critter flick
Review: "Mosquito" is the type of film that not only hits you over the head with its sheer badness; it continues to beat you after you have lost consciousness. The whole thing is an atrocity, a roaring, shrieking train wreck of a film that even the hardiest souls will have a tough time taking seriously. Everything fails on a metatectonic level with this movie: the acting, the plot, the pacing, most of the special effects, and everything else you have come to associate with a motion picture. "Mosquito" is such a miserable movie that you will draw flies if you don't quit gaping at the disaster unfolding onscreen. Have I made myself clear about the total ineptness of this movie yet? Good, because I now need to say watching "Mosquito" is a lot of fun for the lover of trash cinema. Why? Because the whole thing is an atrocity, a roaring, shrieking train wreck of a film that even the hardiest souls will have a tough time taking seriously. Because everything fails on a metatectonic level with this movie: the acting, the plot, the pacing, most of the special effects, and everything else you have come to associate with a motion picture. Because "Mosquito" is such a miserable movie that you will draw flies if you don't quit gaping at the disaster unfolding onscreen. And Gunnar Hansen plays one of the primary characters.

"Mosquito" begins with the crash landing of an extraterrestrial object from space. The craft splashes down in a swamp with disastrous results for the surrounding ecosystem. Well, at least it is for the mosquitoes since it seems only these nasty little buggers suffer any ill effects from the spaceship. The skeeters soon grow to frighteningly huge proportions although no one in the area knows about this impending disaster as of yet. We soon meet four disparate groups of people that we just know will wind up together in the end. There are two young folks--a man and his girlfriend--driving out to a local recreation area so the girl can assume her post as a park ranger. There is an idiotic, whiny male ranger at the park who may rank as one of the worst actors in cinematic history. How do we know he is an idiot? Because he sprays the park for mosquitoes without worrying about poisoning the campers. Somewhere down the road three militia guys with a bag full of money and a bad attitude have a nasty encounter with a giant mosquito in the forest. After suffering a casualty, the two survivors attempt to get out of the area at all costs. Finally, some guy checking out a report of a falling meteor in the area provides the scientific information we need to understand how giant mosquitoes could possibly exist--not really, of course, but he's there to do what he can.

The ravenous mosquitoes make quick work of any people they find out in the open with the exception of our gang of heroes, who soon come together to fight for their lives. They attempt to flee from the malevolent skeeters in an RV, attempt to run from them through a sewer drain, and attempt to escape by barricading themselves in an abandoned house. Predictably, the mosquitoes manage to thin the herd along the way, with a few of our stalwart souls collapsing under the onslaught of the winged hordes as the various methods adopted to deal with the rascals fail miserably. Victims of the mosquitoes tend to shrivel up at an alarming rate, probably due to the rather rapid blood loss accompanying a bite. The idea of falling prey to the mosquitoes is so bad that it requires Gunnar Hansen's character to ally himself with people he doesn't really trust, and to later heft a chainsaw in a futile attempt to rescue one of his imperiled companions. Strange events make for strange bedfellows, apparently. It is almost redundant to say that the conclusion involves a final confrontation with the mutated mosquitoes, one that requires personal sacrifice if our heroes are to save the world.

The flaws of "Mosquito" are as numerous as, say, a swarm of mosquitoes. All of the actors hired for the production uniformly tank in their respective roles, but John Reneaud as the thickheaded ranger Tony is arguably the worst actor in the world. He spends every scene complaining and whining about the situation, so much so that I fervently prayed he would fall victim to the mosquitoes in an especially gruesome fashion. Reneaud is the worst actor in a cast of painfully wooden thespians. Gunnar Hansen, for example, looks awfully stiff in his role as Earl, one of the militia guys with a secret. Put these terrible performances next to the cheesy effects, the gory attack sequences, the ham handed script, and you have a movie sure to alienate most of the viewing audience. "Mosquito" did not alienate me; I liked the movie overall and laughed repeatedly at the antics unfolding onscreen. This one has "so bad it is good" written all over it.

I wouldn't be surprised at all if the movie attained cult classic status. I do know it appears on basic cable from time to time, so apparently there is an audience out there for this type of garbage. The biggest questions I had as the final credits rolled concerned the alien spacecraft. Whatever happened to the ship? Moreover, why would the Air Force send out one guy with experience about meteorites to investigate what is probably the biggest event in the history of the human race? Doesn't the U.S.A.F. have fancy radar and satellite systems designed to detect foreign objects from space? As I wondered about these questions, I realized I was wasting my time. Don't question, just simply sit back and enjoy this immensely entertaining low budget junk heap.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: BAD MOVIE LOVER HEAVEN!!
Review: "My God! It looks like a proboscis!" One of the many great lines in this hilariously badly written, badly acted, cheesily photographed little gem of a film. You're in for a treat when you realize that the action is funnier than the comic relief. The scientists and much of the plot is lifted right from "Food of the Gods;" the climax is reminiscent of "Night of the Living Dead" or "The Birds;" and the dialogue is delivered with all the emotion of the funeral attendees from "Plan Nine From Outer Space." You gotta see it to believe it!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: BAD MOVIE LOVER HEAVEN!!
Review: "My God! It looks like a proboscis!" One of the many great lines in this hilariously badly written, badly acted, cheesily photographed little gem of a film. You're in for a treat when you realize that the action is funnier than the comic relief. The scientists and much of the plot is lifted right from "Food of the Gods;" the climax is reminiscent of "Night of the Living Dead" or "The Birds;" and the dialogue is delivered with all the emotion of the funeral attendees from "Plan Nine From Outer Space." You gotta see it to believe it!

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: SCARY SKEETERS
Review: Giant bug movies are so much fun...don't look for quality in the acting, directing, or even special effects departments. MOSQUITO is enjoyable because it is so bad, and obviously there's a definite tongue in cheek feel, and the mosquitoes are kinda scary, specially if you don't like the little critters anyway. The acting is so bad one can't help but wonder how some of these guys actually played in other movies! I didn't know until reading reviews that Gunnar Hansen was the original Leatherface, but his line concerning the chainsaw is certainly funnier knowing that!
This is one of those so bad it's good flicks, but you will enjoy it if you like bug movies!

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: SCARY SKEETERS
Review: Giant bug movies are so much fun...don't look for quality in the acting, directing, or even special effects departments. MOSQUITO is enjoyable because it is so bad, and obviously there's a definite tongue in cheek feel, and the mosquitoes are kinda scary, specially if you don't like the little critters anyway. The acting is so bad one can't help but wonder how some of these guys actually played in other movies! I didn't know until reading reviews that Gunnar Hansen was the original Leatherface, but his line concerning the chainsaw is certainly funnier knowing that!
This is one of those so bad it's good flicks, but you will enjoy it if you like bug movies!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Martians and Mosquitos
Review: I just watched an amusing little horror movie called Mosquito involving giant mosquitos descending on a state park.

The movie opens with a large space craft approaching Earth and releasing a small shuttle. For some reason the shuttle crashes in the vicinity of a state park. Then there is a very creative scene first showing the emergence of a mosquito in adult form and then its view as it flies towards the downed craft. A hatch is open. There is a pulsing red light inside. A long, thin, three-fingered arm stretches out of the opening. The mosquito feeds and the rest can be imagined.

The opening special effects and some of the mosquito effects are quite good. However in the first scene, which involves several of the leads having a giant mosquito smash on their windshield, the young female park ranger (possibly the smartest and most self sufficient person in the movie) declares the road kill an insect because of what she calls the proboscis (pro-bah-suhs). Her constant rendition of the word told me that while they did a little research for the movie, they did much too little. Other than this blatant overuse of a single "fact" by the "expert" I really enjoyed the movie, especially the George Pal tribute in the beginning.

If you are a fan of giant bug movies, you might be interested in this one. Just don't get it mixed up with a really bad one called Skeeter.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: I've got an itching to tell you...
Review: I'm surprised that it's taken me this long to write a review on this film. Not only have I seen it more than a dozen times on USA and the SCI-FI channel, but I actually own two copies, have an autographed VHS cover AND an autographed theatrical poster (which happens to be nicely framed and hung on my bedroom wall). So, you, the reader, are probably scratching your heads wondering why I would be so dedicated to this film. Well, I guess it all goes back to when I was working for the DNR here in Michigan, and after reading a blurb about the local, low-budget film "Blood Fever" being shot in a neighboring campground, I just had to request a couple days off to be an extra.

How can you not be excited about being an extra in a low-budget horror film which features six-foot tall mosquitos, ESPECIALLY when you happen to have to deal with their miniature cousins every year because you live in a swampy area? So, I showed up at 7 a.m. for the first day and had a great experience watching Director Gary Jones work his magic on the set, which seemed like it was my own backyard, seen as it was only a five-minute drive from where I lived. I couldn't help but be entranced by a model of the 'bloodsucker' which hung from a pole setting in front of one of the camps cabins. Everyone crowded around it, snapping shots, and wondering to themselves if it happened to be the little bugger who snuck a snack from their back leg while enjoying a picnic the night before.

The cast was fun to hang out with, even though I didn't have a chance to meet Gunnar Hansen until he showed up for an autograph session for the film when it hit video stores, (which was even more special to me, since I helped set up the session and I actually got to sign my own autographs, while sitting several chairs down from the reputable actor who exuded a kindness one would actually want to question if he were the same man who wielded the buzzing chainsaw which cut through teens years before). Ron Asheton, Rachelle Loiselle and Tim Lovelace were all present, though, and they had no problem sharing smiles and hotdogs during the lunch break.

So, sure, the movie may have it's cheesiness. It may be a far cry from the horror film one would expect a guy like Gunnar Hansen to pop up in, but, all in all, it was a great experience and is always an enjoyable film to watch when it's on t.v. or I just want to reminisce and pull out my own copy.

So, they say you'll always remember your first love and cherish it. I guess I can say the same for this film. I'll always remember the fun I had and the friends I met. It's been over ten years since it actually lensed, and I've done over a dozen other films which have their own special place in my heart. But, "Mosquito" was my first, and was the introduction to my present career as a film-maker here in Michigan.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: I've got an itching to tell you...
Review: I'm surprised that it's taken me this long to write a review on this film. Not only have I seen it more than a dozen times on USA and the SCI-FI channel, but I actually own two copies, have an autographed VHS cover AND an autographed theatrical poster (which happens to be nicely framed and hung on my bedroom wall). So, you, the reader, are probably scratching your heads wondering why I would be so dedicated to this film. Well, I guess it all goes back to when I was working for the DNR here in Michigan, and after reading a blurb about the local, low-budget film "Blood Fever" being shot in a neighboring campground, I just had to request a couple days off to be an extra.

How can you not be excited about being an extra in a low-budget horror film which features six-foot tall mosquitos, ESPECIALLY when you happen to have to deal with their miniature cousins every year because you live in a swampy area? So, I showed up at 7 a.m. for the first day and had a great experience watching Director Gary Jones work his magic on the set, which seemed like it was my own backyard, seen as it was only a five-minute drive from where I lived. I couldn't help but be entranced by a model of the 'bloodsucker' which hung from a pole setting in front of one of the camps cabins. Everyone crowded around it, snapping shots, and wondering to themselves if it happened to be the little bugger who snuck a snack from their back leg while enjoying a picnic the night before.

The cast was fun to hang out with, even though I didn't have a chance to meet Gunnar Hansen until he showed up for an autograph session for the film when it hit video stores, (which was even more special to me, since I helped set up the session and I actually got to sign my own autographs, while sitting several chairs down from the reputable actor who exuded a kindness one would actually want to question if he were the same man who wielded the buzzing chainsaw which cut through teens years before). Ron Asheton, Rachelle Loiselle and Tim Lovelace were all present, though, and they had no problem sharing smiles and hotdogs during the lunch break.

So, sure, the movie may have it's cheesiness. It may be a far cry from the horror film one would expect a guy like Gunnar Hansen to pop up in, but, all in all, it was a great experience and is always an enjoyable film to watch when it's on t.v. or I just want to reminisce and pull out my own copy.

So, they say you'll always remember your first love and cherish it. I guess I can say the same for this film. I'll always remember the fun I had and the friends I met. It's been over ten years since it actually lensed, and I've done over a dozen other films which have their own special place in my heart. But, "Mosquito" was my first, and was the introduction to my present career as a film-maker here in Michigan.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: A Real Eye Popper
Review: Okay, I'll be honest. This movie is no classic by any means, but it's still a good, enjoyable, big bug flick. Allright, so the dialauge is cheesey but if you're watching this movie for "well thought out dialouge", there's something wrong with you. However, with the exeception of the stop motion animation (Ugh...), this movie has special effects A LOT better than some reviews state. Although I recommend this movie to horror fans or people who don't expect Spielburg, I don't reccomend this to people who DON'T like gross stuff (If you don't, I pity you) because a guy's eyes EXPLODE (yes. You read right. A guy's eyes explode). All in all, a good big bug film with good monsters. BBBBBBUUUUUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZ....SWAT!


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