Rating: 
Summary: You'll scream! You'll laugh! You'll cry for yer Mommy!
Review: Rob Zombie, the eponymous front-man for his death-rocker band and erstwhile Chief Ghoul for metal group White Zombie, loves Halloween. He loves Halloween like some people love Christmas, loves it so much, in fact, that he went out and made "House of 1000 Corpses", which is basically a big, gory, gruesome, and fantastically fine cinematic Halloween Card, right down to the leering Jack-o-Lanterns, grinning ghouls, and hissing black cats with their backs arched in the air.
If you want to get an idea of what you're getting yourself into when you plop "House" into the DVD hopper, then just think of it as this: you're going to a Halloween party, Rob Zombie's Halloween party, where you'll play moonlit games of "Smee" and "hide-and-seek", tell spooky stories of ghosties and ghoulies and long-legged beasties, and bob for apples. Except at this particular party, on this particular night, in this particular House, when you bob for apples you'll probably come up with a severed head affixed to your choppers, not a green Granny Smith apple. *That*, my friends, is the spirit of "House of 1,000 Corpses", which is an eclectic, frenetic, furious, and occasionally terrifying homage to 1970's horror and the essence of Halloween. The plot is itself vintage: a carload of four teen-agers go roving about the backroads of Southwest Texas, looking for freakish roadside attractions, and boy do they find one in Captain Spaulding's Museum of Monsters and Madmen, which features a carnie-ride featuring some of history's most ghoulish murderers and villains---including the notorious "Doctor Satan", who, Spaulding notes, was "hanged right near here." Could you resist? Naturally our heroes---or at least the two guys (played competently by Rainn Wilson and Chris Hardwick in what could easily have been throwaway roles)---want to check out the legend. On the way they run into a pretty hitch-hiker (played wickedly by Zombie's sultry real-life wife Sherri Moon), who says Doctor Satan's final resting place is just over the hill from her house---and hey, why doesn't everyone stop by for dinner? Naturally the car breaks down right outside the infamous 'House', and while Brother Rufus promises to fix the car up our heroes venure inside to meet the Family. The rest of the movie is a fun-filled night of ghoulishness and gravy ensues for all! Are your horror-movie check-lists ready? *Sid Haig sporting yellow snaggle-teeth and decked out in about 100 pounds of pancake make-up hamming it up? Check! *Luscious Sherri Moon alternating between innocent chanteuse and giggling psychopath? Check! *Clueless sheriffs suffering fates that shouldn't happen to a junkyard dog? Check! *The hideous, lurching Tiny Firefly (played creepily by Matthew McGrory), who managed to creep me out completely merely by shambling in to dinner? Check!
*1,000 corpses? I lost count, but you've got plenty of corpses in all states of decomposition, so Check! *Gory vivisection designed to turn one of our heroes into a mutilated sideshow freak? Check!
*Underground cavern of horrors filled with shambling legions of undead, bloodthirsty freaks? Double check! *Frenzied cross-eyed Karen Black in her best role since "Burnt Offerings"? Check! *Texas Chainsaw Massacre II veteran Bill Moseley (who played the beloved chop-top in that film) on hand for fun and depravity? You betcha! Zombie has a fine eye for horror, and the film alternates, crazily, between gorgeously set-up and lushly filmed long tracking shots (reminiscent of 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre') and jerky, MTV-style quick cuts and flashes that suggest Oliver Stone's "Natural Born Killers". Sometimes Zombie's style is disconcerting and undermines the atmosphere, but this becomes less of a problem as the movie picks up speed and as the bodies start piling up. There are some beautiful sequences here, by the way: the opening at Captain Spaulding's (featuring two of the unluckiest armed robbers in cinema history) and the sequence between Otis Firefly and the Deputy are classic chillers.
This movie could easily have been just an homage to vintage horror, but Zombie fires up the bellows and drives this chugging little Locomotive of Gore right through the gates: from the scene where two of the teen-agers suffer a 'premature burial' through the film's psychedelic finale, "House" lurches into virgin new territory of sheer weirdness, invoking the camera-style and waking-nightmare feel of Italian horror maestro Dario Argento. Without a doubt, Doctor Satan is one of the strangest beasties ever to shamble forth out of the dark of nightmare, but what about the thing that chases one of the girls through a seemingly endless series of ruined shafts, the thing with what appears to be a gasmask pulled over a fleshy red ski-mask---or at least I thought it was a ski-mask, until I realized, with a shock, that it was the Thing's HEAD! Once upon a time, you would have had to end a review like this with the line "they don't make 'em like this anymore, folks!". But happily, Rob Zombie has---thanks Rob! While not for everyone---you'll love it or hate it, no middle ground here---Zombie has made a classic little cauldron of pure Halloween gory goodness, one that has already carved out a spot for itself as a cult classic. Break out the carmeled apples and Kandy Korn, and have yourself a terrifying good time. Happy Halloween!
Rating: 
Summary: okay
Review: I waited so long to see this drivel. It's not worth it. Mediocre at best.
Rating:
Summary: Zombie's missed potential
Review: First of all, after reading many of the one-star reviews, I want to say that it is totally unfair to be smugly writing Rob Zombie off as an amateur film maker; well, duh?--it IS his first film. Even Craven had to have a first film--and that one wasn't exactly a quantum leap forward in filmaking either, and yet . . . I agree that this film left much to be desired: the acting never really took off; Karen Black's talent was tragically wasted; Sid Haig was underused (he was a complete hoot as Captain Spalding!); and the storyline, such as it is, completely fizzles before the film is even half over. Know this, Zombie is a HELL of a director; he has a genius for the nuances of terror and style. The gore in the film is never over-the-top, and the lighting and set designs are marvels of creeping horror. Two pieces of advice for his next movie (and there will be a next): NEVER allow Sheri Moon your wife/squeeze whatever to be in another film-there was simply no excuse for that cacophany she tried to pass off as acting; second, let a real writer write the scripts-no matter how much gore and special effects you use in any horror movie, the real heart that pumps the film are the characters . . . whether evil or good, there must be a quality to him or her that compells the viewer to make it to the end of the film and care about what happens. Sadly, this was the Zombie film's weakest point, as it left me completely nonplussed by the end.
Rating:
Summary: Sex! Death!....and Clowns?!
Review: Well now! This is definitely something different! Rob Zombie has fashioned a gen-u-ine 1970's horror film! What makes this film work,is it's general "low budget" look. Everyone's costuming looks like clothes from home,the film locations look like someone's ranch,and the actors don't exactly seem like they are acting. ( And Sid Haig....I am convinced You never ever remove the clown paint!). This film is fun and creepy and scarey,and best of all....not 100% P-R-E-D-I-C-T-A-B-L-E!
Rob Zombie borrows liberally from all sorts of old B-Grade Horror films,but more as a tribute than a rip off,of all of those "spam in a cabin" flicks.Four young kids stumble into a world of hurt when they cross roads with the Firefly Family,and they get everything but the kitchen sink thrown at them! Zombies,Cannibals,Medical Experiments Gone Wrong,Preverts, Incestuous Hillbillies,Murderers,Psychos,Demon Worshippers, Clowns,Masked Gunmen,Horror Show Hosts,Bunny Costumes....and Michael J.Pollard! HOO-WEE!!
The DVD extras are fun as Capt.Spaulding,Otis & Baby lead you throgh the menus ( Let them run,they talk for awhile,especially Capt.Spaulding on the opening menu.).There are also 3 "Easter Eggs" ( click around on the menu pages ). The only thing not here is the "directors version",which was rumored as being released.
Anywho...if you want a good frightening....Rob Zombie and Company have got you covered! ( And I'm not just saying that because Dr.Satan may or may not be my Uncle.( Mama's kinda hush-hush about that. )
Rating:
Summary: One of the best horror films in a very long time
Review: How can you not love this movie? We have a horror movie made by a true fanatic of horror movies. Zombie didn't want to make one of those horror movies of recent years which you forget about, he wanted to make a horror classic, and he did. He shows his love for the horror genre by going back to the basics like horror movies used to do. All the camera angles, characters, storyline, scenery, and music all mixed together to make an amazing movie. If you are the right kind of fan-this movie, especially particular scenes, will remain tattooed into your mind days after seeing this film. Zombie did a masterful job with this and I can't wait for the sequel.
Rating: 
Summary: stripper zombie killers
Review: I enjoyed the spliced in Bettie Page impersonator, and the soulful rendition of "I Wanna Be Loved By You." I appreciated the gore. And yet, I didn't think this qualified as a feature film. A two-hour Rob Zombie video is more like it. It was about 115 minutes too long. The spastic editing made the movie hard to follow. The scariest part about the whole film was that so much money was poured into it. See it if you want to, but don't say I didn't warn you.
Rating: 
Summary: Zombie did a good job considering what he was aiming for.
Review: One thing people don't seem to realize about this movie is that Zombie's goal was to make this movie like the original horror movies of the 70's, especially Texas Chainsaw Massacre. If you pay attention you will notice that everything in the movie points to the 70's era cloths, cars, verbal conversations, etc. His brilliant use of negatives and odd camerea angles add to the tension in the movie. The music choices are from an odd selection including some of Zombies work and even the Ramones. If you like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre then you will like this.
Rating:
Summary: this is a great movie for all you twisted sickos out there
Review: One day me and my friend wanted to go see a movie.So we went to fandango.com and saw what movies were playing.we saw house of 1000 corpses and watched the trailer.We thought it was like a haunted house movie.I TOTALLY REGRET EVER EVEN THINKING ABOUT WATCHING IT IT IS JUST A MOVIE THAT SHOWS PEOLPE GETTING TORTURED AND THERE GETTING TORTURED BY HUMANS WHICH MAKES IT EVEN MORE DUMB AND UNSCARY.I was so grosed out by it.My dad took me to see it but i didnt want to be rude and ask if we could go.I have no ideA why anyone would ever like it.ITS NOT THE LEAST BIT SCARY NOT EVEN IN THEATERS. what ever you do do not rent this even its a 29 cent rental.
Rating: 
Summary: Rob Zombie Fan
Review: This movie seemed to be aimed at shocking and horrifying people rather than actually giving anyone a good scare. I couldn't believe something this grotesque could come out of one persons mind. I can only count two times in this movie where I actually felt scared. I can't, however, begin to count the ammount of times I felt appauled and disguested. I'm a horror-film lover, but this passes the limit of being tastefully scary and dives into insanity. I give this movie a 2 for effort...but it just went too far. If these are images into the brain of Rob Zombie, I'm thinking a psychiatrist is in order.
Rating:
Summary: True Horror classic!
Review: The only people that would not enjoy this movie would be people who are not TRUE horror fans. For those of you who rated this a one star, go back to watching your cookie cutter mainstream horror, for they are more up your alley. But for you real horror fans, this is a must see cult classic!!
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