Rating: 
Summary: not a bad zombie flick
Review: This is not a bad zombie flick at all. It just plays like a cinematic from a video game wich is not a bad thing since this movie is made after a video game.As stated by a previous reviewer this movie has it all, topless babes and lot of blasting zombies with matrix like special effects! While this is not the best zombie flick around it is without a doubt a good one although they could have left out all of the game footage that keeps popping up throughout the movie I thought that was lame. I recomend this movie just dont expect dawn of the dead as this film is nothing like that.
Rating: 
Summary: Zombies and the Plot That Flew South for the Winter
Review: Picture this: The biggest rave of the year is about to start on a island in the middle of nowhere, complete with the party lights and ladies and all the alcoholic trimmings you can ingest, and you're invited. All you have to do is get yourself and your friends to a boat departing for it by 5:00, strap on your party privies, and go all out.
Now picture this: You arrive at the dock, find the place a little on the empty side while you're waiting for the three ladies you're with to arrive, and that's when you figure out that you've missed your ticket to play by all of fifteen minutes. So you know you need to get there, even if you have to charter a fishing boat with a questionable two-man crew and getting there after the initial celebration kickoff.
Now picture that, but with a horror movie twist: When you arrive, you find everything in order, all the stuff still standing and waiting and blinking those neon blinks you envisioned, but the people that should be accompanying them are nowhere to be found. All you find are bloody tatters forecasting a probability that disaster has taken place, and you also notice the other not-quite living and not-quite-dead things traveling keeping the stuff company as well. Its sad to say this in retrospect, but this movie really had the potential to be something entertaining. It had a basis that was build on the ever-giving blood and violence some many love to partake in, enough commercial backing to actually make money with the project and to spawn sequels if it were done correctly, and something of a schematic to draw on. All a director really had to do was take the plotline to the zombie shooter, change it around so it would work outside of the videogame arena, and then go to town with all the ideas they could dream up. Add to that the fact that the "House of the Dead" videogame series were widely known, that the trailers for the film said that this would be worth watching, and you had yourself a ballgame. Unfortunately, all of that made me think I should see it, that it might be good because I have always been a sucker for zombie movies (even some pretty bad ones), and that this might fit into the new trend to make horror bigger and better. Yes, what could go wrong?
Everything. Instead of being a movie that was scary or funny or something shoved somewhere in-between, House of the Dead simply started out as a bad piece of cinema and ended as a well-rounded diet of annoying and tiresome. Not only did it sport a cast that didn't seem to understand the meaning of the word "acting," but the way the zombies worked in this film and some of the mechanics of the directors vision (if we can call it that) were tiresome.
First, the zombies were something that went beyond being disposable, with them somehow managing to slaughter droves of people without so much as a sign left in the initial (and not shown, to make matters all-the-more boring) struggle but still being fragile enough to be take out with kicks, bullets to the arms or legs, and even the occasional panic-hurled jar.
Next, there were the occasional shots of the wonderfully-aged videogame that appear for absolutely no reason and take up space in moments that were supposed to be both cryptic and dramatic and worth wathcing. Sometimes, when zombies were being shot, the all-too-human monsters and their exploding heads would be replaced with a pixelated image (and a bad one at that) of a zombie, some slash marks made by it, and a "1st Player, press start" icon in the corner.
After that, there were the forced portions of the movie that tried to work in zombies and action but did none of the above with any clarity, the scenes of the rave of the year that didn't look like much of a party, and the interaction of completely worthless characters as they struggled to survive. Yes, the party of the year seemed to consist of one stage, a bar, some tents and beanbags, and an island with a score or two of party-people. It was then visited by five people, some additional weight they brought with them, and some cops that didn't make me want them to live or die; their actions as rigid as some of the zombies. And did I mention the horrible plot and the "outhouse of doom" that was, for some reason, supposed to be scary (and a laboratory) to boot? Perhaps, had the movie not been hyped to be good, I could have forgiven it and I could have laughed. I actually like quite a few Italian movies with zombies that aren't that effect-prone, and I like many of the Trouma releases despite their lack of budgets. I can even go as far as to say that I enjoy movies that look like they were shot on camcorders from time to time. The thing I couldn't forgive in this is that it pitched itself to be something it wasn't, causing me to think I'd missed something when I skipped it at the movies when I hadn't. Added to that, the DVD features are meaningless; with 3 deleted scenes, some storyboard "could have been" scenarios, a little "how we made our cheap monsters move" skit, and commentary. At least the nudity in the beginning, all be it a short drive down "swimming topless in a thong" lane, was nice. That's the only thing keeping it out of the one-star gutter.
Rating: 
Summary: Don't listen to the critics.....this movie is AWESOME!!!!!!!
Review: I really don't understand all of the negative reviews this movie is getting. I'm not quite sure what people were expecting when going in to see this movie. I wanted to see an all out war between the zombies and the human survivors and that is exactly what I got! This movie has all the ingredients for a FUN movie, not an Academy Award winner, but a very fun movie. Zombies slaughtering humans, humans kung-fuing and mowing down zombies with automatic weapons, thrills, chills and even some gorgeous ladies stripping down for us. What else could you want in a movie. Don't listen to most of the idiots below...run, don't walk to get this cool dvd. This movie demands a sequel.
Rating:
Summary: Mind Numbing, Cult Movie Entertainment........
Review: This is one of the most laugh out loud non-intentional comedies I have seen in a while. It was so bad, I loved it. This will be a cult classic for sure. House of the Dead will make you really think that a group of MTV Real World cast members could pick up shotguns and turn into some Kung Fu masters. "I was an underwear model, now I'm Charles Bronson.......Let's kick some zombie butt!" Wow, I'm cracking up just thinking about it.
Rating:
Summary: AWESOME F***IN' MOVIE!!!!!!!
Review: This film is the greatest video game based film ever! This is much better than any other video game movie. I can't believe I'm reading what I'm reading. This movie is one of the few that actually delivers stuff from the game. When in the Resident Evil games did a lazer kill you? Why was it titled Mortal Kombat if it had minimal fighting? Granted I like both of these movies, but they shouldn't be holding the titles that they do. This one delivered everything that made these games great. Minimal story and loads of bloody action. Have any of ya'll even played these games? You expect a movie to be like The Piano and Citizen Kane and you forget that a horror movie is supposed to be fun to watch. The Ring sucked because it had way too much stuff going on at once, but this one just gets right to the f***in' point! I enjoyed this movie and I hope to see a sequel.
Rating: 
Summary: AWFUL AND LAUGHABLY BAD!!
Review: A brain-dead patchwork of "Night of the Living Dead," "Scooby-Doo," "The Zombie Island Massacre" and other more obscure sources, it embraces its video-game roots to the point where you can barely tell the humans from the zombies. The scariest aspect of this AWFUL horror movie adaptation of the best-selling video games is not the myriad zombies on display, or even the presence of hoor goofball fav, Clint Howard in a film not directed by his brother. No, it's the participation of the talented German actor Jurgen Prochnow, who some 20 years ago infused the classic "Das Boot" with his steely, rugged presence and who now apparently needs to find a new agent. Prochnow plays a grizzled fishing boat captain named, in one of the film's many lame attempts at humor, Capt. Kirk. Kirk, along with his hook-armed sidekick Salish (Howard), is ferrying over a group of text-book stupid, but good-looking, youthful victims to the "Isla de la Muerte," off the coast of Seattle, to attend a rave party. Needless to say, the island is populated by a group of flesh-eating zombies, whose presence has apparently been caused by a murderous Spaniard from a few hundred years ago, seen in a series of tacky, sepia-toned flashbacks. You'd be hard-pressed to find a duller, more incompetent - and less scary - flick with cheesier effects in a remainder bin crammed with direct-to-video horrors. There isn't a decent shock in sight, except maybe the stunningly inept performances by the no-name cast who, at some points, appear to be reading their lines phonetically off TelePrompters. Some of the women are gratuitously topless, including one lass to whom Salish tries to give a magic necklace "for your protection." Once the movie gets to the island, director Uwe Boll drops all pretense of coherence - it's just a deadly series of human-zombie battles, shot with no imagination whatsoever and intercut with video-game graphics and some head-scratching 16th-century flashbacks.
Rating:
Summary: House of the Dead- You'll want to be dead after seeing it
Review: House of the Dead, a poor excuse for a horror flick is one horrific movie. A huge mistake, with a cast of mostly unknowns and a unknown director Uwe Boll. This film does not entertain at all, even for horror affecionados, this is just unbelievably bad. And the sad thing is I actually had some hope for this movie.
House of the Dead as I can recall never received a lot of advertising or hype, and it wouldn't matter if it had anyways.
Perhaps if a better and actually known and good director had taken the helms along with a better cast which can actually ACT, this might've been a lot better. The plot of this movie is pretty predictable, essentially a bunch of sexually active teens are going to this mysterious island where there's a huge party. They get an unwilling sea captain to take them there, and when they arrive there they find the whole place isolated with no sign of life. Scare you? It shouldn't, cause this movie doesn't have 1 single scare, the only thing it offers is a reasonably long shootout, which never seems to end is not even that entertaining. It's amazingly boring, but the one reason if any to see this disgrace of a movie. That sequenece earns this movie its one star. It's obvious to see why this movie flopped at the box-office, hell it's nowhere near a good halloween flick. If you want see it rent it, don't see it in theatres, it will be released on Video and DVD, January 27,
2004.
House of the Dead is rated R for Pervasive Strong Violence, Language and Some Nudity. The violence includes a lot of gunplay and fisticuffs. There is not sexual content really, bascially some innuendo and gratuitous nudity. The profanity is moderate. BAD, BAD, BAD! The bottom line: A worthy contender for worst film of 2003.
Rating: 
Summary: "House of the Discharge"
Review: There's a rave on an island which is called "The Island of the Dead." Of course you have the usual group of imbecilic, young adults who want to attend this rave. Upon arrival, no one is to be found and the party is over. Oh, poor kids. Then these zombies jump out from the trees and form buffet lines. "House of the Dead" is so dumb, it works. As an ode to 'B' movies and really cheesy awful horror movies, the action never lets up and the zombies even know martial arts. It's incredibly funny during the shootout in the cemetery. And they even threw in an immortal zombie who's looking for pretty body parts to add to his collection. Man, that artifact can move like Hammer! There's plenty of action, there's plenty of nudity for all you teenage boys, and there's plenty of quick shots ripped straight from the video game! Oh yes, Sega would be proud. DO NOT take this movie seriously because it doesn't take itself seriously.
Rating:
Summary: Lamest Movie Ever
Review: If you want to see lame acting, pointless nudity, poorly done action scenes, and horrible direction, this is the movie for you. These kinds of movies give "Video Game to Movie" movies a bad name. What was the point of flashing footage from the game in the movie?? The opening credits where kinda cool but it should have stopped there. The soundtrack is good...but it is the only good thing about this movie. If you want a good zombie horror flick check out Resident Evil and 28 Days Laters (not really zombie but close enough). This movie was so bad I didn't even finish watching it. Just say no to "House of the Dead".
Rating:
Summary: Why I love this movie...
Review: I understand fully why so many people have given this a one star movie. And yes I do agree with them whole heartedly. But let me (as a long time horror movie buff) tell you why you should rent and watch this movie, or even like me buy the movie. 1st) You dont care about any of the characters. None of the characters are heroic, none of them are interesting, they are just "there" in all the glory of video game violence. They may be three dimensional beings in real life, but none of 'em are above 2d in perspective in this movie. You know as well as I do, you WANT to see these idiot characters get hacked and bitten and torn apart!... 2nd) You have to see it just for the Matrix rip off. I find it funny how some movies create cliches, and this one LOVES to use those same cliches (like the one point where the Asian woman leans all the way back as a melee weapon is about to knock her head off)... 3rd) Yuppie young adults turn into Marines; by that, I mean, these idiots suddenly are able to use any and all sorts of weapons that (reality speaking) one would have to use extreme skill to use. (also note the bullets dont act real world wise)...ALSO NOTE: that in the bad editing, one moment the character is holding one kind of gun, the next they are using a different kind of gun, all the while wrapped together... (so thus magic is performed I guess!)... 4th) Yuppy and oh maybe century old zombies suddenly turn into Martial Arts experts. Suddenly these zombies are able to perform vast array of tasks that they couldn't do when they were alive (except maybe dance in raves, which doesn't take too much intelligence to do in the first place). 5th) Great dialogue: "What do you think will happen to us?" Hmmm...I wonder??? You can't get any better than that; ok, maybe you could, but come on...its a zombie movie...not something you'd see in some kind of Theater Class! So come on, grab a beer or two, some popcorn, and watch all watch...a really really really really really really bad and funny film!
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