Phantasm

Rating:
Summary: Don't do the same mistake I did. Rent before you BUY !!
Review: A sinister tall man with incredible strength and yellow blood steals cadavers from the cemetery, shrinks them and transports them via a trampoline to a red planet where they become his slaves for reasons not made clear. Add in an annoying, snooping teenager, his handsome but wooden older brother and a plastic fly with glowing eyes and you have possibly, the LAMEST horror film ever made.

After reading all of the positive reviews posted here, I did the unthinkable and purchased this film BEFORE actually viewing it. What a big mistake. I am a BIG horror movie fan and my taste in horror films is not limited. My taste range from the classics- THE EXORCIST, POLTERGEIST, HALLOWEEN to B-Movie favourites- ZOMBIE, HOUSE BY THE CEMETERY, GHOST STORY but I have to be brutally honest, PHANTASM has got to be the most boring movie I have ever seen. I have tried watching it on several occasions (my guess, over 15 times) and I cannot sit through it. It is a BORE-FEST and I cannot recommend it to anyone. I have to agree with Leanard Maltin's *1/2 review, but I think even he was being generous.

The film's pace is agonizingly slow, the acting is stiff and uninspired, the special effect are attrocious and the story is laughable. I personally don't have a problem with low budget horror films. As a matter of fact, some of my all time favourites are of the low budget kind but this film does not make any sense. It tries to be creative but the ideas are laughable at best. The scene when the obnoxious kid is transported to the Red Planet is so outragously funny as is the scene with the incredibly unrealistic flying insect with the glowing eyes. I understand the film didn't have much of a budget but how can we ignore such lame scenes. THE ONLY good scene in the film is when a man has his face drilled by the flying, silver sphere.

The film (as evidenced by the reviews posted on this site) has a cult following but for those of you who are not ardent PHANTASM FANS, please avoid this film at all costs as you will hate it. I have tried watching this turkey by myself sober, by myself drunk, with friends sober, with friends drunk, with family members sober, with family members drunk to no avail. I was told repeatedly to turn the thing off and put something else on.

I know I will probably get about 100 UNHELPFUL votes from you PHANTASM lover's out there but so be it. This movie is bottom of the barrell and only good for a few (unintentional) laughs.

Skip it people cause you have better ways to spend your money. If it's chills your looking for, you're better off watching an episode of FEAR FACTOR cause you're just not going to find any here.

Rating:
Summary: Inexplicable, Atmospheric and Entertaining
Review: I finally got around to picking up my copy of the original Phantasm. I'd been wanting to see it for years, having seen Phantasm 2 and 3 on cable a number of times, but kept not getting around to it for some reason or another. This is a very weird film, no doubt, and it certainly won't appeal to those who are unwilling or unable to accept Horror films on their own terms, but those who are truly interested in Horror ought to find a lot to like here.

Though it is most famous for the flying, drill-wielding silver ball, Phantasm is all about atmosphere. It's very deliberately paced, which works because this pacing allows them to create a truly oppressive atmosphere. The camerawork is slow, and smooth, and there are some nicely framed and composed shots, particularly within the funeral home. It's not a flashy film, however, very low key, but very effective. It's hard to put your finger on it, but everything in this film has a surreal feel to it, and there's always a definite sense that something is really wrong, even when we have little idea evidence of what is going on. How they manage to do this in many of the more mundane scenes I'm not completely sure, but lots of it has to come from the great soundtrack. The simple 8 note pattern that dominates the soundtrack is utterly eerie and unrelenting, and pretty much everything else works pretty well.(Also, very little of it sounds dated, and extraordinary thing for a primarily synthetic soundtrack from the 70's) The mausoleum itself is particularly eerie, and Coscarelli wisely chooses to let the inherent creepiness of such locales speak for themselves. The cheap, faux-fancy furnishing of your typical funeral home are offputting enough in and of themselves, and are a perfect fit for the surreal, inexplicable horror film that Coscarelli was trying to create.

A plot synopsis would be fairly pointless, but I'll go ahead anyway. Mike, a lonely, parent-less youth with fears of abandonment discovers that there are strange things going on at the local Funeral home, which is apparently run by the elderly and sinister Tall Man. This leads to a whole bunch a weird crap, involving shrunken zombie, flying spheres, portals to other dimensions, severed fingers turning into murderous insects, and other odd things. Most everything here works, with the exception of the fight with the insect, which is painfully unconvincing. The mini-zombies work pretty well, as they are glimpsed rarely and briefly, and they make ferocious, inhuman sounds. They actually create menace from midget-monk-zombies; not an easy task, for sure. The sphere itself, while it only appears briefly, is very cool. The actual head-drilling, blood-spewing kill by the sphere is far more disturbing and far less cartoonish than I would have imagined. Definitely nicely done. And then there's the Tall Man himself, who's probably my favorite horror villain. Sadly, he's not as good here as he'd be in 2 and 3, as he isn't as good at delivering his few lines.(4 in total, I believe), and isn't as old and haggard as he would look in those films. Still, I like him a hellva lot. Sadly, the final confrontation with the Tall Man isn't too great, but you can forgive it for faltering a bit at the end, as it was continually strong up to that point.

The acting is hit and miss. Each of the principal actors is noticeably bad at some point or another, but pretty passable much of the time, and, most siginificantly, each of the main characters is very likable, despite the fact that we know so little about them. There's even a scene at the very end of the movie which is actually pretty touching, I think.(I can't go into specifics without giving too much away, but you'll know it when you see it.) And, as I said before, Scrimm doesn't bring his A game, but he's still a classic villain.

This is just a very good low-budget horror film. The DVD itself is pretty nice too, better than I would've anticipated. Hopefully, 2 and 3 will get a region 1 DVD release before too much longer, as I like them both a lot.(I'll be branded a heretic, but I think I like 2 the best of the 3 I've seen. I think it's even more atmospheric, as they move from one barren, wasted town to the next. But, that's for another review...)

Rating:
Summary: B(...)OYY(...)
Review: this movie is very scary and entertaining. it is so out there and weird it makes you want to watch it over and over again. there are some parts that are so scary that they stick with you and(good luck trying to go to sleep) you're f**ked for the rest of the night. there are also parts that are so entertaining and just terrific that you just laugh out loud, not from humor, but just because you are having so much fun. though i was skeptical upon renting it, i used my free rental card on this and i am really glad i did. i have watched it once, am about to go watch it again, and plan on either buying it now or getting it for christmas. the ending is actually one of the best i have ever seen, and look out for a tall man who doesn't say much, except for(...).