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The Swarm

The Swarm

List Price: $19.98
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Rating: 2 stars
Summary: So absolutely horrible its entertaining
Review: "The Swarm" (1978) was a box-office disaster when it was originally released. And no wonder, what with its bottom-of-the-barrel special effects, absolutely horrible, illogical script by Stirling Silliphant and direction by Irwin Allen that shows none of the professionalism or pacing of his best films--namely, "The Poseidon Adventure" and "The Towering Inferno." What's more, in its original, 115-minute form, it appears to have been edited by a meat cleaver and jumps from one calamity to another with such abruptness that after a while everything becomes laughable. Yet, I actually have a certain fondness for the thing, especially in its expanded, 156-minute DVD version, which is actually an improvement, basically since it is better paced and the characters and situations prove more tolerable. Yes, it is still a horrible film, but also oddly entertaining, much like watching William Hung on "American Idol." You know it stinks but you're fascinated anyway.

The film plays on '70's paranoia in its depiction of an invasion of the desert southwest by a huge swarm of bees. The cast is large and full of disaster movie veterans and legendary big-screen hasbeens, most of whom show up just long enough to be killed by the bees. Actually, the film is best-known for featuring Michael Caine, in one of two consecutive screen megabombs (the other being "Beyond the Poseidon Adventure") which would have killed any other career; fortunately, he survived the debacles and went on to win two Oscars and become one of our greatest screen actors. His main support comes from Katharine Ross and Richard Widmark, whose careers unfortunately did not recover. The rest of the cast shall remain nameless, since the surviving players are probably still embarassed by their performances, which usually end with their characters attacked by bees, flailing their arms and screaming in slow motion before falling to the ground. At least those are the lucky ones. Others are blown up in train crashes or nuclear power plants, which are illogically overpowered by the bees, which resemble those little chocolate sprinkles you put on ice cream.

The plot? Are you kidding? The United States is invaded by killer bees from Africa. People die. Whole towns are lost. Houston is evacuated. The entire cast dies, except Caine and Ross, who evidently are immune to the bees since they manage to escape Houston by simply putting a towel over their heads while everyone else dies. All of this directed with incredible incompetence by Irwin Allen, who managed to make "The Towering Inferno" look like "Titanic" in comparison.

There's no use discussing the cast since everyone is simply picking up a paycheck. Michael Caine once said he made the film so he could build a house and he ended up with a lousy film and a beautiful house. Judging by the jokes he's endured for this atrocity, the "Poseidon" sequel, and especially, "Jaws the Revenge," he earned the house. Luckily for the viewer, the ineptitude is actually entertaining at times, and funnier than most of today's so-called comedies, so who can begrudge him?

Incidentally, this film was scored by the great, incomparable composer Jerry Goldsmith, who passed away last week. Tellingly, "The Swarm" was not mentioned when the highlights of his career were discussed. I wonder why?

In all, "The Swarm" is horrible. So horrible, in fact, it is entertaining. Now, as for "Beyond the Poseidon Adventure"---

** (out of *****), simply because it's so damned funny. And if you care? Panavision widescreen, with no other features. My opinion? Raquel Welch did a commentary track to "Myra Breckinridge" which was eons better than the film. What about it, Mike? Ready to buy a new house?

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Campy, bad disaster movie that is surprisingly fun
Review: "The Swarm" is merely another in the long line of 1970's disaster flicks that the Hollywood machine churned out with almost reckless abandon. The difference here is that, instead of burning building or shaking ground, the disaster is a swarm of 'Africanized' killer bees that attack southern Texas with extreme ferocity. While there is no doubt that killer bees do exist and are quite vicious when they attack, this particular swarm seems capable of doing things that not even the USSR could have imagined accomplishing. These bees cause helicopters to crash, force passenger trains off the track, and... get this... cause a nuclear power plant to explode (!). These are some pretty impressive bees. For all the outlandishly ridiculous plot developments, "The Swarm" is still a fun movie to watch. It's especially fun to watch actors of higher pedigree try to contend with this material. On the one hand, there is Richard Chamberlain, an actor wants badly to be a better actor than the material he performs lets him be. On the other hand, there is Oscar-winner, Michael Caine, who shows a propensity for choosing awful roles at the same rate as he chooses award-winning roles (how else can you explain a man who wins Academy Awards in such compelling films as "Hannah and her Sisters" and "The Cider House Rules", while also starring in such monumental turkeys as "Jaws: The Revenge" and "Beyond the Poseidon Adventure"). It's fun watching the two of them recite the dialogue of this movie and seeing them not smirk at what they're saying. "The Swarm" is a bad, bad movie, but it has that extra bit of flair that allows it to be so bad it's good.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: An Irwin Allen Classic in my book!
Review: "The Swarm" is one of my all time favorite movies. Basicly because it scared the tar out of me when I was a kid. But nowadays I've gotten to where I really like it. The story about Killer Bees approaching Houston was a good premise. I also like the fact that the expanded version on the dvd answered some questions I'd had for a long time. For example, What ever happened to the kid whose parents were killed at the beginning?
The expanded version is a tad long. But watchable and in my opinion, better than the original theatrical release. Which is why I gave the film such a high rating.
See this movie for yourself and enjoy.
It comes highly recommended for Irwin Allen fans!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: WHEN'S THE DVD COMING OUT?
Review: A great laugh riot! A mad swarm of killer bees is heading for Houston, destroying a large oart of the American Southwest in the process. See my review under my VIRGIN.NET address for more details. This movie rocks big time!

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Extremely Dull
Review: As a bad movie lover I thought I found a lost classic when I purchased this, but instead found it to be very dull. Yes, the diologue and acting are both bad, but not the kind of bad that I found funny. Most of the movie just drags along and at times I felt like I was watching an episode of "The Love Boat." When the bees came, it was nothing special. No gore or anything out of the ordinary, just a bunch of stunt people covered in real live bees...yawn! If you like Irwin Allen films stick to The Poseidon Adventure, Earthquake, and The Towering Inferno. Forget this mess it's a complete waste of time.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Old-fashioned monster movie with all-star cast
Review: Contrary to popular opinion, THE SWARM (1978) is not the worst movie ever made. Anyone who says otherwise clearly hasn't seen the collected works of Jesus Franco or Andy Milligan. Or Woody Allen. Having exhausted the possibilities of the one-disaster-in-a-single-film subgenre (THE POSEIDON ADVENTURE, THE TOWERING INFERNO, FIRE!, FLOOD, etc.), producer-director Irwin Allen - who died in 1991 - hired screenwriter Stirling Silliphant (IN THE HEAT OF THE NIGHT) to conceive a storyline in which several catastrophes occur within a broader narrative. Taking his cue from previous small-scale entries like THE DEADLY BEES (1966) and TERROR OUT OF THE SKY (1978), Silliphant concocted THE SWARM, an old-fashioned monster movie with an all-star cast, in which a huge mass of African killer bees rampage across America's south-west before descending on Houston, destroying everything in their path - including towns, trains, nuclear power plants, and the reputations of numerous high-profile actors.

Representing the last gasp of the disaster cycle inaugurated in 1969 by Ross Hunter's big-time adaptation of Arthur Hailey's AIRPORT and popularized by Allen with respectable entries like the aforementioned POSEIDON and TOWERING (the latter a bona fide masterpiece), THE SWARM encapsulates this director's basic commercial ethos: Big stars, big set-pieces, and big drama. But Silliphant's script is so hokey in places, it's difficult to believe the writer wasn't deliberately mocking the entire scenario: Michael Caine is so obviously miscast (as a 'brilliant' entomologist), and so clearly contemptuous of the material, his expression never changes throughout the entire film, though Richard Widmark (whose career enjoyed a brief renaissance during the 1970's) gives it everything he's got as a gruff military type who's eager to quell the threat by bombing everything in sight. Henry Fonda rises above the fray as a dedicated immunologist, and Slim Pickens is quietly dignified in a brief appearance as a bereaved father, while Olivia De Havilland forms the centerpiece of a gentle romantic subplot (she's courted by Fred MacMurray and Ben Johnson). Richard Chamberlain, Lee Grant, Jose Ferrer, Bradford Dillman and Patty Duke Astin are featured in supporting roles alongside leading lady Katharine Ross, who seems particularly embarrassed by her ridiculous dialogue (get a load of her hysterical reaction to the death of a sympathetic younger character - if you lean forward, you can almost smell the ham!).

Unfortunately, this DVD features the 155m version (expanded from the 116m theatrical print), which pads the narrative with pointless dialogue exchanges and routine soap opera melodramatics, turning a tightly constructed disaster thriller into an endless yak-fest. Whereas the theatrical print moved along at a fair old clip, this version slows everything down to a mild saunter, punctuated by a number of flamboyant visual fireworks. Allen stages the action sequences with a good deal of cinematic flair (despite poor photographic effects by industry veteran L.B. Abbott), but the movie's entertainment value is seriously compromised by needless padding.

Warner's region 1 disc - which runs 154m 56s - letterboxes the wide Panavision frame at 2.35:1, and is anamorphically enhanced. This is REAL scope photography, with characters positioned across the entire width of the screen and numerous bits of business occurring simultaneously at opposite ends of the frame, unlike the TV-friendly scope movies of today, which rely almost exclusively on close-ups and medium shots. The print is solid, though colors are a little drab. Likewise, the 2.0 Dolby surround track is strong but unremarkable, highlighting another bombastic score by Jerry Goldsmith (who excelled himself the same year with superb compositions for DAMIEN OMEN II and THE BOYS FROM BRAZIL). English captions and subtitles are provided. Extras include a trailer and cast profiles, and a 1978 TV special 'Inside The Swarm' (22m 9s) which features contemporary interviews with some of the cast, and extensive coverage of Allen directing key sequences, where he comes across as a latterday Cecil B. DeMille, marshalling his considerable creative resources with all the skill of a seasoned pro ("Sensational!" he cries, after filming a particularly complex crowd scene). It's a fascinating snapshot, particularly for budding filmmakers interested in the day-to-day details of movie production.

NB. Michael Caine apparently recorded a commentary for this release which was mysteriously dropped from the final assembly. Given the film's reputation as a so-called 'Golden Turkey', speculation is rife that Caine rubbished the movie to a degree that seemed incompatible with the disc's commercial prospects. Or maybe the commentary simply wasn't good enough. Who knows?

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: SO CHEESY IT'S A BLAST!
Review: For sheer audacity, this is another classic howler from Irwin Allen`s epic disaster back catalogue! Michael Caine and Katharine Ross get all the unintentionally hilarious lines(CAINE: I never dreamed it would turn out to be the bees. They've always been our friends.) And these bees begin the movie by showing who really rules the skies by invading a nuclear missile silo and attacking the launch crew. They proceed to cause helicopter crashes(yes, that is in the plot!), attack a picnicking all-American family(yeeaahhh) and invade a town during its annual flower festival, causing many victims to run around like penguins trying to fly and fall all over the place looking utter idiots. As the military and scientists' attempts to wipe out the bees are miserable failures, the deadly swarm cause a spectacular train crash(special effects by the local model train shop), and much more mayhem. Then they head for (gulp!) HOUSTON! Can the all-star cast save the day??? We know the outcome, but if you would like an absolute laugh riot(I want to see the extended version myself!) and like to watch well-known names try to deadpan their way through some of the most unintentionally hilarious dialogue ever written for the screen, then this is the cheesy 1970s classic for you! The novel, by Arthur Herzog, incidentally, is much better.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Magnificent "Disasterpiece"
Review: Great Movie! But why are the bees referred to as "The Africans" - reference to Zu Lu??? Sir Michael - can you explain??

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Terrible, Terrible, Terrible
Review: How can an all star cast participate in such a bad movie??? What Slop? Henry Fonda is terrible! Caine is awful! Buy this movie for laughs!!!!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Stinging indictment
Review: Irwin Allen's 1978 film THE SWARM, while no one can call it a masterpiece (to put it mildly), is still a long way away from being a PLAN NINE-style clinker. Yes, the special effects aren't all that great (they were no great shakes either in 1978), the cast is saddled with unusually lame dialogue supplied by Stirling Silliphant (basing the film on Arthur Herzog's novel of the same name).

All of that I will cheerfully agree to. But the fact is that when I saw this film on TV once, I was very frightened by the bee attacks. And let's look at it from a purely prophetic point of view: Because THE SWARM is not about European honey-bees but the far more agressive Africanized ones, this can be a terrifying movie if one looks past the so-so effects and the equally so-so script. Those bees are among us now. Maybe this film did more good than a lot of people expected.

Perhaps four stars is a bit much, but that's the rating I'd give to so prescient a horror/suspense film as this.


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