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Satan's School for Girls

Satan's School for Girls

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Rating: 3 stars
Summary: funny movie, horrible quality dvd
Review: Though I'm a little embarassed to review a movie which doesn't move, I'm gutting it out because of Pamela Franklin, one of the two cutest actresses in history (the other being Genevieve Bujold), and in my view the *only* reason for watching this film. Having said that, I don't believe it's as bad as Leonard Maltin thinks it is, because there are a couple sequences in it, especially the one where Pamela goes, lamp in hand, down to the basement level of the schoolhouse in the midst of a thunderstorm, that are atmospheric -- not exactly classic Gothic stuff, but still passably good for a low-budget TV movie. In fact, most of the cast is either superior or respectable (not excluding Jo Van Fleet as the schoolmistress, and of course Roy Thinnes as the eponymous heavy). The problem is the contrived and pointless plot -- it's never explained why Satan, assuming He exists, should show up in this ridiculous little schoolhouse -- unless, like me, He's got a yen for Pamela (or Kate), so when we see him at the end of the film before his "coven" of acolytes with a monumental simper on his face, it's more outlandish than anything Aleister Crowley could have dreamed of. At that point, my jaw dropped about 5 inches, but not from horror. For her part, Pamela shows awesome professionalism in a role which insults her acting talent, but which still can't succeed in concealing her charm. It's films like this which make me think there should be a "Stoicism Award" at the Oscars, given to the candidate who, in spite of the most formidable obstacles, manages to escape from a movie without needing an exorcist.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: And for Stoicism, the Oscar goes to....
Review: Though I'm a little embarassed to review a movie which doesn't move, I'm gutting it out because of Pamela Franklin, one of the two cutest actresses in history (the other being Genevieve Bujold), and in my view the *only* reason for watching this film. Having said that, I don't believe it's as bad as Leonard Maltin thinks it is, because there are a couple sequences in it, especially the one where Pamela goes, lamp in hand, down to the basement level of the schoolhouse in the midst of a thunderstorm, that are atmospheric -- not exactly classic Gothic stuff, but still passably good for a low-budget TV movie. In fact, most of the cast is either superior or respectable (not excluding Jo Van Fleet as the schoolmistress, and of course Roy Thinnes as the eponymous heavy). The problem is the contrived and pointless plot -- it's never explained why Satan, assuming He exists, should show up in this ridiculous little schoolhouse -- unless, like me, He's got a yen for Pamela (or Kate), so when we see him at the end of the film before his "coven" of acolytes with a monumental simper on his face, it's more outlandish than anything Aleister Crowley could have dreamed of. At that point, my jaw dropped about 5 inches, but not from horror. For her part, Pamela shows awesome professionalism in a role which insults her acting talent, but which still can't succeed in concealing her charm. It's films like this which make me think there should be a "Stoicism Award" at the Oscars, given to the candidate who, in spite of the most formidable obstacles, manages to escape from a movie without needing an exorcist.


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