Long Island Cannibal Massacre

Rating:
Summary: Obscure Pleasures
Review: Great retro shocker!

Long Island Cannibal Massacre is an incredible find! This shot on Super-8 horror movie totally caught me by surprise, as I was expecting just another cheap, gory run of the mill schlocker. Was I surprised to find that this movie actually has a great story and genuinely frightening characters. Briefly, the plot concerns a series of murders committed by two hired killers, a biker and a masked nut job. Turns out that the hire-ee is a guy who's committed to feeding his leper father human female flesh. A two-fisted hero cop tries to put an end to the mayhem, but surprises upon surprises assault you from every angle. You just never know where this blood bath will take you next. While the acting isn't so hot, and the films budget is obviously very low, one must give credit to anyone capable of pulling off an effective and atmospheric little chestnut such as this. The photography is quite good and some of the make-up effects are mind-blowing for something on this budget. The DVD has interviews & commentaries with the director, Nathan Schiff, who could do wonders if he had a real budget! As well as interviews with two of the cast members. It's all quite fascinating listening to these penniless entrepreneurs make the most of what they had, and succeeding where many big-budget Hollywood films of a similar nature fail. Highly recommended to any fan of ultra-low-budget horror made with gusto and imagination, rather than huge budgets and polish.

Rating:
Summary: even the gore couldn't save this below grade Z MESS!?!?!?!
Review: i love low low low budget films don't get me wrong!!!!!but every great low budget movie has a specific reason why its looked at as a GREAT LOW BUDGET FILM!!!!!! for example the movies "DEAD-ALIVE" & "BAD TASTE" both of these movies do rely mostly on gore but peter jackson is also a great director & with that combination you can take a CRAPPPPY STORY & BADDDD ACTING & a low budget & turn it into a genre MASTERPIECE!!!! maybe even a better example is the movie "REDNECK ZOMBIES" maybe not the greatest directed movie but there definetly were plenty of HINTS!! of genius from the director mix that with alot of well done low low budget gore & some unintnded humour & you got a LOW LOW BUDGET MASTERPIECE ya know? somthing fun. "LONG ISLAND CANNIBAL MASSACRE" is not any of these things it has nothing that can SAVE!!!it!!! its filled with ABSOLUTE HORRID ACTING(im not joking this makes the acting in redneck zombies look superb!?!?!?)/THE(")(UN") DIRECTING WASN'T EVEN DIRECTING IT WAS A GUY WITH A CAMERA & THATS ALL/THE GORE/EFX WERE SO UNREALISTIC THEY MIGHT AS WELL CUT THE KNEE CAP OFF & PULL THE INTSTINES OUT FROM THERE IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!!!JUST NOT ACURATE AT ALL/NOW WE GET TO THE WORST PART OF ALL!! THE STORY!!(guy pays 2 other guys to kill chicks so he can feed them to his unbelieveble unrealisticly deformed father??????)& people when you see what his father looks like your going to either break the dvd player or the dvd it self or throw something through the tv ,freeze in agony & defeat that you spent money on this or all of the above & then some!!!!! bottom line is there is nothing artistic about this low budget flick its low budget all around & THATS NOT GOOD!!!!! THIS IS NOT A JOKE THIS IS A WARNING STAY CLEAR AWAY FROM THIS (")(UN") MOVIE!!!DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME OR ESPECIALY YOUR MONEY!!!!! EVEN THE GORE COULDN'T SAVE THIS BELOW GRADE Z MESS!!!!! p.s. if you want a true low budget gore flick get any of the other ones that i mentioned above or look up the names "HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS" "LUCIO FULCI" "JOE D'AMATO" "UMBETO LENZI" "MARIO & LAMBERTO BAVA" "DARIO ARGENTO" & SO ON!!! just don't bother with "LONG ISLAND CANNIBAL MASSACRE" ITS NOT EVEN A MOVIE ITS CRAP! (...)