Rating: 
Summary: Where to Begin???
Review: ***Spoilers! But the movie is so predictable it doesn't matter***
I can't even begin to think where I should start ripping this Horror(able) movie apart. But let me try.
The Story: Not much of one but let me try. Ben is an overly happy chap who seems to be way-too-chummy with everyone on his beach resort... Until the Meg shows up. This computer animated shark that growls reeks havoc in Mexico and destroys an evil businessman's plans of a fibor-obtic communications cable. The shark is drawn out of the water by electrodes coming from the cable. It then goes on a killing spree and has to be stopped by the above mentioned jovial fellow, an attractive paleontologist, and another cheerful individual who happens to have an onslaught of atomic weapons (as all ex-naval officers do.) They devise a plan to kill the Meg and save the world from a possible prehistoric Armageddon. I'm serious, this is no joke.
The Bad: So it begins- I can honestly tell you there is at least one thing to laugh at in EVERY scene. I'll give a brief listing of them.
-The server who gives the happy Ben coffee in the morning (which Ben seems ready to burst with laughter over this colossal feat) is a different server when the camera changes angles.
-Three and a half words: "Here comes El Guapo"
-The security guard at the overly hot Cat's museum CAN'T SPEAK. He is a stuttery mm-mmm-mess
-When Esai starts the boat, they flip back to the jubilant Ben and if you look at the water, the boat isn't moving.
-The ENTIRE swordfish scene. Listen to the franco in the background attempting to speak. Then the whole "thirty years" comment. What in the sam hell is that?
-The randomness of the two punk rockers going down a water slide. Who are they? Why are they there? Why is the water in the slide turned on at 2:00 AM? Who is the mysterious shark queen they show at the end of the scene? Does she summon the sharks? Is she in charge of the entire Meg population? Will she start a chain of events that will lead to the end of the world?
-The line. You know which one. Right before the love scene. "You know I'm really tired, well actually I'm wired, how bout I take you home and" -I will NOT ruin this for you. Watch this with friends you'll get a kick. I'd try this line at the bars, but I think I'd get my @$$ kicked.
-The code monkeys
-The growls from the shark
-The @$$ man conversation
-The screen on the tracking device is a piece of paper that is glued on.
-The Jet Ski scene
-The way the one dude falls out of the boat during the parasailing scene.
-The fact that the always pleasant Ben and crew find it more necessary to help some drunk with a boo-boo on his head that a lady who is about to get mauled by a megalodon (that growls.)
-The angle on the camera that was put on the meg is on the wrong fin when they show it.
-The intolerable chumminess and amount of high fives.
The Good: Ha, that's a laugh, Except for the hot girls throughout the entire flick.
For those of you have seen this trash before go back and watch for these flaws.
And for those of you who say this is the worst/funniest movie ever, shame on you!!! You've obviously never seen Satan's Children starring Bobby Douglas. Check it out.
Rating: 
Summary: More like a Mega Letdown!
Review: A couple years ago, I read the book Meg, which was about a megalodon. I absolutely loved that book. Then, a couple months ago, I heard that this movie was going to be on the Sci-Fi Channel (my parents would not let me rent it). I hadn't really heard much about it, except it was the third Shark Attack movie (which have nothing to do with each other) and the basic plot. So, I decided to tape it along with Crocodile and Crocodile 2: Death Roll, which were on Sci-Fi the same day. I thought that Shark Attack 3 wasn't going to be an extremely good movie, so I kept that in mind as I watched it. As it turned out, I was disappointed. The first hour or so has a baby meg munching on the people at a Mexican resort. The baby was the size of a full grown great white, and since this was a low-budget, straight-to-video release... stock footage! Then, the plot takes a very odd turn when the baby's mother appears out of nowhere. The effects for this mama shark were awful. It's just great white footage in slow motion, some poorly-done CGI, and two or three shots of great white's heads added digitally to the screen. The cast of the film is horrible. The hero of the story, Ben (John Barrowman), looks sort of like Ben Stiller, and says the "s" word at least 25-30 times. The leading lady, played by Jennifer McShane (the girl who played the leading lady [a different character] in the first Shark Attack) is awful. When she says "Oh my God!" when a girl is about to be eaten by the baby meg, her tone is like a teenage girl gossiping between classes in the hallway at school. And Jennifer McShane did a very good performance in Scream 3 (2000), too. Everyone else is pretty stupid, too. The bay meg in this movie is 99% great white stock footage, but there are some brief moments where there is a cardboard fin, and a rubber toy. Almost everyone who reviewed this movie said that the sharks growl. They don't, however. They burp. That's right. Whenever they open their mouths to snap up an unsuspecting person, they let out a long, low belch. I found that absolutely hilarious. There is also HORRIBLE continuity. In one scene, there are two people swimming, and we see stock footage of a tiger shark. Then a great white. Then a tiger again. Then a great white again, which opens wide and burps at the two people. We then see stock footage of a great white tearing something up and one of the people screaming. Seconds later, you see both people run out of the water, and one of them looks back to see a piece of rubber with a fin attached to it floating in the water. Then, it shows Ben (the hero) inspecting a sand tiger shark, which had just startled the two people. And the shark was DEAD! And its body was floating in the water. Sharks don't have flotation bladders. When they die, they sink to the bottom of the ocean! We saw a great white rip something apart, with blood in the water, and both people are alive and unscathed, and it was said to be a sand tiger! Come on, people! Anyway, this movie is only worth watching if you have nothing else to do, or you had a depressing day and you need a good laugh. Or, if you had held your anger in for years and years, you could watch this movie and take it out on the video or DVD, smashing it, throwing it against the wall, etc.
Rating:
Summary: I'm really wired
Review: Anyone who has seen this movie on DVD (NOT TV) knows how amazing this movie is. The unedited version has nudity as a tool to try and save the movie which is the tell tale sign of a bad B rate movie. The acting was awful and the main character is a guy who looks like a total rip off of Tom Cruise. You'd expect the writing to be done by a highschooler. The movie is completely random at times such as my title for the review and the masked woman which leaves you saying what the heck were they thinking. Overall, this is a freaking awsome movie. I don't normally buy DVD's but this one had to be bought.
Rating:
Summary: Shark Attack 3. Attack of the Megalodon
Review: Being a vertebrate paleontologist for many years, I found this movie to be many things wrapped in one. The best word to describe this movie: ACCURATE. Out of the several movies depicting sharks, none have quite captured the true essence and behavior patterns of sharks so well. Not only was this movie capturing the true fear and trauma that a shark can cause, it depicted them in their natural environment, reacting as they normally would to human and watercraft presence.
Sharks are very aggressive and get agitated easily at the sight of transcontinental cables on the ocean floor. This has been proved in studies throughought the many trenches of the ocean floor. It is their natural inclination to defend their territory. Back in 1997 I documented a case of extremely severe territorial aggression against my diving team. The international cabling team had finished laying 2300+ miles of fiber-optic cable. The sharks, being highly intelligent, immediately attacked the line once it was finished. they thrashed it, causing great damage, and then upon instinct, attacked the boats above. The hull damage was so severe we had to abandon ship into the escape dingys and wait for rescue. 4 of the team was lost to the great beasts of the deep. This movie was so good I plan on using it as a documentary in my lessons at the University. Now I can also see flaws in a movie. I saw several, and will go through them now:
The shark "growl". Everyone whom is experienced with sharks knows that the growl is much louder than depicted in the movie. It sounds more like a Yetti howling a gutteral moan.
Second: The size of the Megaladon is completely off base. An actual Megaladon is at least twice the size of the one shown in the movie. A true Megaladon could swallow and crush an oil tanker whole, should it want to.
Third: The Megaladon was an amphibious creature. It should have easily been able to come up on land and devour the entire resort.
The lack of concern for the guests at the resort is understandable and typical in shark situations. The less people know, the better. Every good resort owner/safetly officer knows this.
Do not however underestimate the fear this movie will make you feel. Watch it with the lights on, this is serious, gruesome footage. You want the true nature and world of the shark, of the Megalodon, this is a purchase that will make you sleep with the lights on. It is awesome, powerful, intriguing. Compared to such movies and Jaws, Piranha, 20,000 Leauges Under the Sea, Titanic for that matter. None compare. Buy this. Dont wait. If anyone has any questions about the Megaladon, about the TRUTH, about the reality of the threat sharks pose, call me at 800-879-8795 x 232. I would be more than happy to talk to you. MOVIE RATING: A++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Rating:
Summary: 3 Words....
Review: BEST MOVIE EVER!This movie represents all that is great in the world of bad movies. Do yourself a favor and GIVER!
Rating:
Summary: Some awesome parts you may have missed
Review: For those of you who haven't had the privelege of witnessing the spelndor that is Shark Attack 3: Megalodon, I highly recommend that you do so now. If you buy the DVD, I guarantedd that you won't regret your purchase. For those who have seen and acknowledged the awesomeness of this film, here are some things to look for when watching it a second time (another thing I highly recommend). 1. When Ben comes out of the water after finding the shark tooth, he mentions to the other divers that he was getting himself dinner, and holds up a mesh bag. This bag is apparently supposed to contain a lobster, but its contents more closely resemble the thing that jumps out of the egg in Alien. 2. When Ben is taking a picture of the shark tooth and uploading it to his computer with his digital camera, a perceptive observer will notice that the camera is not, in technical terms, "attached" to the computer during any part of the process. 3. When Cat is looking at the message Ben posted, the word "mystery" has somehow changed its spelling to "mistery" 4. For those who don't know what fiberoptic cable is, I should explain that it is more or less a bunch of long strands of glass that you shine light through. I'm no expert, but I can't imagine a fiber-optic cable creating the "low level electric fields" that supposedly lure the sharks out of the trench. 5. When the John McCain-looking character shows the tracking device he's going to attach to the shark, it looks suspiciously like a common kind of garage door opener. 6. When the yacht is attacked at the end, you can pretty clearly see the actors knocking furniture over to help simulate a violent striking of the boat by a monster shark. 7. The end credits, after the first three people, read more like a copy of the Russian census. I'd estimate that about 85-90% of the last names end in the letter 'v'.
Rating:
Summary: Some awesome parts you may have missed
Review: For those of you who haven't had the privelege of witnessing the spelndor that is Shark Attack 3: Megalodon, I highly recommend that you do so now. If you buy the DVD, I guarantedd that you won't regret your purchase. For those who have seen and acknowledged the awesomeness of this film, here are some things to look for when watching it a second time (another thing I highly recommend). 1. When Ben comes out of the water after finding the shark tooth, he mentions to the other divers that he was getting himself dinner, and holds up a mesh bag. This bag is apparently supposed to contain a lobster, but its contents more closely resemble the thing that jumps out of the egg in Alien. 2. When Ben is taking a picture of the shark tooth and uploading it to his computer with his digital camera, a perceptive observer will notice that the camera is not, in technical terms, "attached" to the computer during any part of the process. 3. When Cat is looking at the message Ben posted, the word "mystery" has somehow changed its spelling to "mistery" 4. For those who don't know what fiberoptic cable is, I should explain that it is more or less a bunch of long strands of glass that you shine light through. I'm no expert, but I can't imagine a fiber-optic cable creating the "low level electric fields" that supposedly lure the sharks out of the trench. 5. When the John McCain-looking character shows the tracking device he's going to attach to the shark, it looks suspiciously like a common kind of garage door opener. 6. When the yacht is attacked at the end, you can pretty clearly see the actors knocking furniture over to help simulate a violent striking of the boat by a monster shark. 7. The end credits, after the first three people, read more like a copy of the Russian census. I'd estimate that about 85-90% of the last names end in the letter 'v'.
Rating: 
Summary: Do Sharks Dream?
Review: I am in my early thirties, which, by almost anyone's definition still classifies me as relatively young. I am old enough, however, that I have watched more than my fair share of grade Z ubercheesy movies. During my late night television excursions in the 1980s, I vividly remember watching the sort of films that could cause serious brain damage to even the most stalwart soul, films loaded with monosyllabic actors, scripts written on clay tablets, and special effects that were neither special nor effective. I thought I saw it all during those halcyon days of youth, until I discovered the wonders of "Shark Attack 3: Megalodon." You have not lived until you witness the spectacular beauty, the overwhelming sense of metaphysical ecstasy, the sheer jaw dropping brilliance of "Shark Attack 3." In fact, don't even finish reading this review. You are wasting valuable time better spent tracking down a copy of this inspiring objet d'art. Believe me when I tell you that this film will not stay on store shelves for long. I felt from the beginning that I was in the presence of greatness with this movie, and every minute that went by only confirmed this initial impression. The story of "Shark Attack 3: Megalodon" is deceptively simple, but even a doctor of philosophy probably could not discern the higher planes of thought contained in this movie. A resort in Mexico faces danger from the reemergence of the prehistoric Megalodon shark, who swims up from the Challenger Trench to attack an underground cable set up by the evil Apex Corporation. The only hope for humanity rests with the actions of Ben, an employee of the resort, and Cat, a paleontologist who arrives in Mexico to hunt down the shark. The film is necessarily gory, as the shark attacks anyone in the water and even attacks boats with seeming indifference. Just when we think the shark's defeat is imminent, a surprise visitor shows up to wreak further havoc on the human race. See, it sounds simple, doesn't it? I will admit my credentials leave me woefully inadequate to properly analyze "Shark Attack 3," but I firmly believe the answer lies in the Challenger Trench where the Megalodon lives. The trench is obviously a metaphor for a Nietzschean abyss, and when man stares deeply into the crevasse the abyss stares back by disgorging the prehistoric shark. Ben represents the superman, as you will see when this seemingly mild mannered individual rises over all other humans on the planet to combat the ancient evil of the Megalodon. Ben accomplishes feats no other person could hope to achieve. The boats he sails on move even when they look like they are standing still, and a ship with the hull in tatters from an assault by the shark fails to sink when Ben appears on the scene. Only a superman will lead the human race, and Ben is that superman. If you think Crispin Glover is the end all be all of the performing arts, you will appreciate the genius of John Barrowman, the actor who plays the Ben role. Both actors share the sublime visions that make a film like "Shark Attack 3" possible even though Glover unfortunately never appears in the movie. I quickly realized you don't need to worry about watching the two previous films that constitute the rest of this series. Oh no, "Shark Attack 3: Megalodon" stands alone, proudly eschewing such banalities as an engaging script, decent special effects, talented actors, and lush cinematography. The director, crew, and cast of "Shark Attack 3" roared their derision at the mere idea of such conventional cinematic structures. These brave pioneers, these trailblazers of the celluloid frontier used stock footage of divers and sharks for half of the total running time of the film. Sure, the actors laughed for no reason during many of the scenes, but you would not contain your glee either if you starred in this straight to video magnum opus. I also noticed how many times the male actors gave each other high fives during the course of the story, which makes perfect sense when you realize that these Shakespearean thespians are merely expressing the elation they feel about such career making roles. This cast is going places, folks. After delivering groundbreaking performances in this movie, they will take the world of industrial training films by storm. Special mention goes to the two gentlemen driving the boat with the parasailer in tow. The performance these two budding Brandos turn in evokes hints of a higher evolutionary form of mankind, a state the rest of us may reach in 10,000 years or so. It should go without saying that I have neither the ability nor the space to convey the full implications of the old tar that accompanies Ben on his quest to defeat the abyss-creature. Just watch for the line, "I have a spare. It's the Navy way," and you'll understand my dilemma. I suspect plans are underway to recruit additional Slavic actors in order to create a "Shark Attack 4," and I seriously believe that another film in this series will sweep away the old epistemologies and usher in a superior consciousness amongst the human race. In the meantime, we all have our hands full just trying to decipher the intricacies of "Shark Attack 3." I give this wonderfully vibrant cinematic venture one star, but not for obvious reasons. The one star is actually a judgment about me, a viewer who failed to grasp the inner configurations of this fascinating philosophical jaunt.
Rating:
Summary: Incredible cinematic action!! The Megladon looks so real!!
Review: I am now so afraid to go into the ocean, even on a big boat because the Megladon eats boats for dinner!! I thought that this movie would be [bad]and a rip off of all the Jaws movies, but boy was I wrong!! The acting is top notch, the cinematography is amazing and the chemistry between the main characters was through the roof!! I threw my popcorn in the air when the megladon first surfaced!! It scared the living daylights out of me! You need to buy this movie now if you dont have it already! I guarentee this will be your favorite movie ever!!!
Rating:
Summary: Cheesy
Review: I just finished watching this movie on t.v. and I have to say I am disappointed. I love shark movies but this was just [bad]. I would not recomend that anyone purchase this movie-I wouldn't even pay to rent it. Wait till it comes on t.v.-You probably won't want to watch it again. I like watching shark movies for the shark-This "giant" shark was a normal sized shark they tried(and failed)to make look bigger. I can't count the number of times I laughed at the cheesy dialog. It was OK if you really, really like shark movies-but once is more than enough.
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