The Bone Snatcher

Rating:
Summary: Don't waste your time
Review: In a nutshell, this was long, boring and just plain stupid. I kept waiting for the movie to get interesting... after a while, I was just plain waiting for it to be over. When you find out what the "Bone Snatcher" turns out to be, you're either going to be highly disappointed or die laughing hysterically. You're also going to be kicking yourself for wasting your time and money like I did.

Rating:
Summary: CHeck this one out!
Review: Kept me guessing, at least once the movie gets going. Some interesting character set up in the first 20 minutes or so and from then on a mix of mood, style, action and suspense with careful and very effective use of CG effects at different key points in the film. I've never seen a film set in the Namibian desert before and actually I hope I do again because this thing was gorgeous. Once or twice the writing felt a little tired but overall I've got no complaints. In fact I'd reccomend this film to anyone who likes to be scared for a couple of hours and wants to see some serious style as well. Plus some great music from a couple of Brit composers.

Rating:
Summary: Eeek! Bugs!
Review: Okay, so this wasn't the greatest film I've ever seen, but I didn't expect it to be. The editing seemed patchy to me, and the dialog got tedious at times. So why three stars? Well, sure it's loaded with clichés and plot holes, but the concept is pretty cool and seeing the monster(s) in action was fun -- very clever idea. Besides, half the fun of watching a cheesy horror film is in laughing at the inconsistencies -- for instance, it cracked me up to watch one of the actors very, very carefully remove a vial of nitroglycerin from its padded container, only to have the other actor (after carefully carefully closing the lid) toss it into the truck. Obviously, this is special horror film nitro, created to explode only in proximity to a monster.

I was particularly confused by one scene, which I am about to describe in detail, so if you want to watch the film, you might want to stop here.

Our Heroes are huddled around a dead tree, waiting for the Horrible Monster to appear. We hear it approaching, we see it (gasp! it's hideous!), it can't cross the barrier of gasoline Our Heroes created, but then it rears back and seems to fling killer ants OVER the barrier at Our Heroes! Yikes! Fade to black, cut to next scene as Our Heroes awaken, yawn, stretch, and everyone is fine. One of Our Heroes has even been sleeping while sprawled comfortably on the sand, away from the protection of the gasoline barrier. I was so confused that I watched the scene a couple more times. Where did the Horrible Monster go? What happened to the killer ants? Why the heck didn't the thing just step over the gasoline? Did it just run away? Perhaps the gesture that I interpreted as ant flinging was actually a fist shaking, "oh if I could get over there you'd be SO eaten alive" gesture of frustration. Ah, B-horror films, what would life be without you?

Rating:
Summary: Two Hours Wasted
Review: The Bone Snatcher is a Sci-Fi original, except that 95% of the profanity was silenced from the two-hour movie. Perhaps they should have silenced 95% of the dialogue, too, maybe blacked out the awful CGI effects.

The movie starts off with this three-man prospect team searching for diamond pipes, and they find this questionable mound. When they break through, something attacks them. The movie shifts to Canada where this scientist is then sent into the field to evaluate some technical problem. Our hero, an everyday guy with zero appeal and just as much acting ability, protests the temporary transfer to a South Africa diamond mine. He's apparently some inventing genius, having created a distilling device and tracking gizmo.

When he arrives, he meets a variety of secondary characters including the Hot Babe, the Bitter Ex-Boyfriend, the Sexist Supervisor, the Granny Truck Driver, the Unknown Personality Technician, and the Superstitious Native Tracker. Seriously, the cast was a lesson in B horror movie stereotypes, and we started guessing who'd get picked off first. There's horseplay and an effort at humor, but it falls flat.

Once accepted by the crew, the hero joins the other characters on an open-air truck that's loaded down with fuel, which they're delivering to a far-off secondary station. En route, they'll swing by the last location of the prospectors and check things out. Everyone is armed because of bandits, and they also load up a first aid kit. It's going to be a long drive, and the audience knows that something will happen once these characters are isolated in the desert. All the seeds have been planted -- the distilling device, the tracking gizmo, the weapons, the extra fuel, the medical supplies... it's textbook planting, if I ever saw it. If the audience sees a gun in a drawer as a character closes it, then that gun must be used later in the story.

Unfortunately, the movie doesn't pay off on most of these elements, and that's only one of the problems. The characters find the decimated corpses of the prospectors, then the truck conveniently breaks down and the creature attacks. The guns were used and some of the supplies. Our hero, at one point before the attack, uses the back isolation board to surf down sand dunes because he can't sleep, so we expected some sort of exciting chase later. Nope. The truck had a ton of fuel on it, so we expected some sort of explosion. Nope. At least I was right about who would die first.

We were guessing that the creature was water-based because the gizmo was designed to find water up to 100 kilometers away. Well, kinda... Bland Hero tells us that it also picks up certain pH factors, especially acidic features, which is coincidentally what the creature excretes to get to the bones of its victims. Nice of the writers to change gears on us, or not use anything at all. We also figured that the distilling device would come into play, too, that it would be used to destroy the creature that's killing people. This doesn't happen. At all.

The movie concludes with this awful confrontation in an abandoned mining shaft where Bitter Ex-Boyfriend, carrying a vial of nitroglycerin, is running around and *falling down* with no apparent fear of blowing up. When we think the creature is destroyed, the Hero realizes that there's some central "brain" guiding the actions of these SuperAnts... but what happened to the queen theory?!? At this point, the only people left are Bland Hero and Hot Chick, who are suddenly attracted to each other -- okay, fear makes people do things, but c'mon! And, of course, the twist ending is a pathetic attempt to leave room open for a sequel.

Well... two hours down the drain. Nothing could have saved this bad, bad movie except a really good plot doctor. (Note to Sci-Fi -- I'm available.)

Rating:
Summary: Not too bad
Review: The premise for The Bone Snatcher is farfetched, of course, but imaginative. Ant-like creatures that eat human flesh, then join the bones together and walk like a man. Which is the more frightening, small creatures in swarms, or a walking skeleton, is debatable. The execution of the story is better than expected. The development of the characters isn't bad. Although definitely a "B" movie, this one does make it possible to suspend one's disbelief, even if for a short while.


Rating:
Summary: Me wants more of them bones!
Review: The prologue of "Bone Snatcher" begins with a scenic shot of the Namibia Desert in Africa. 3 Geologists on a special assignment are killed and sucked in to the earth by a mysterious force. Meanwhile in Vancouver, British Columbia a young Canadian scientist is sent on a field research assignment to try to locate potential water sources in the desert. As he arrives in the desert post, he is aided by a crew of five on their own mission, to relocate the 3 missing geologists. As the crew etch further into the barren desert wasteland, their truck breaks down. Panic mounts as the crew find out the desert is not as barren as they thought for there are creatures out there, creatures hungry for bones...

An interesting b-movie this certainly is, a South African and Canadian co-production shot entirely in the deserts of Africa. Comparisons to films like "Tremors" and "Pitch Black" would not be unwarranted however this film reminded me most of "Nemesis 2", another good cheesy desert sci-fi film. I was surprised at how slick the production of this film is, it looks polished and not as amateurish as I thought it would. More like a quality late-night cable TV movie. The cast are a likeable lot, especially actress Rachel Shelley, who I would most definitely like to see more of in the future. The only character that annoyed was the main character, the Canadian scientist, who comes across as a total incompetent in his field and seems more preoccupied with surfing sand dunes and hitting on Rachel Shelley than doing his job. The rest of the crew are actually better at drawing scientific conclusions than he is, but I guess this was probably an intentional thing, to have the comedic benefit of a character who thinks who knows it all staggering around like a clueless dope.

The movie really picks up speed once the crew are forced to abandon the safety of their supply-heavy truck and begin a slow treck by foot across the seemingly never-ending desert. Typical of these types of movies, the crew start getting picked off one by one by mysterious creatures. The creatures are certainly quite special to say the least, slimy packs of bones, with a skull for a head who all seem to be shaped differently one from another. Whoever designed these creatures gets a nod in the originality department. I have noticed many horror fans lament the use of CGI in modern films. For the most part, I agree that gore effects are usually best left to qualified make-up effect artists than computers. However, Bone Snatcher benefits greatly from CGI technology. When the creatures suck the life out of victims, they grow meat to their bones; when they get shot, they disintegrate into a pile of jittery black sand. The CGI effects that were used to translate these images to the screen look quite remarkable. I heartily recommend "Bone Snatcher" although I will not pass it off as a great movie, it's too unintentionally dumb in many aspects for that but it certainly is a fun movie. The scenic desert shots, the electronically-flavoured tribal music filled with African chants as well cool CGI monster effects are the best reasons to give "Bone Snatcher" a go.

Rating:
Summary: The Ants Go Marching...
Review: This is a slick little film. The B-Movie plot is backed up by location shooting and some high-grade special effects.

Three prospectors are out in the Namib desert. They get an interesting reading that looks like a volcanic pipe but can't be. While there si no hope of diamonds, they still check it out. They find a large mound surrounded by poles, fetishes and other occult-looking warnings. They break open the mound, one is sucked in, and the rest are not heard from again.

Meanwhile the company they work for is having some hostile-environment-survival software trouble. The designer is sent against his will (he is a code man and not a field person). He soon finds himself dropped in the middle of nowhere by a cab.

We quickly meet the rest of the cast that includes a militant who seems only interested in being mean enough to be hazardous to the operation. The programmer also has a nifty new prototype device that can detect water from up to 100 feet away ("so will a good stick" declares the militant). The cast then sets out to find the missing guys from the movies opening and to deliver supplies to another facility.

Now that we have everyone alone in the desert, we can run into the title horror. When the missing men have been found they look to have been dead for far longer than they have. Then their bones are stolen. The nifty water detector seems to react to the creatures presence. It seems to be small things that pull together into a larger form around the bones they have stolen.

We later learn that the beasties seem to be ants and have been around and feared for a very long time. The original victims had disturbed their nest and their queen. They are now on the move to find a new safe location.

Many of the characters are very two-dimensional but that was expected. Some are typical in this sort of movie, like the programmer who may be brilliant in the computer lab, but is totally helpless in the field. We also have the tough truck driver and the take-charge female love-interest.

All in all it was a pretty well-done film with the plot being revealed steadily throughout the film. The creature(s) was(were) interesting although the ending could have used a little more explanation when the cab returns to the middle of nowhere. An original and fun movie.

Rating:
Summary: Original and Noteworthy "B" Horror Flick
Review: Three people are out in the middle of the Namib Desert in Africa performing geologic surveys in hopes of discovering the next big diamond mine. When something unusual shows up in their readings, they decide to check it out. When the three never return to their home base to check in, others set out searching for them. Though the three missing individuals have only been out of contact for about 6 hours, the remains that are found seem picked almost dry. The search party sets out to find the one who killed their friends, and they realize all too soon that they are not up against any ordinary, human killer. Slowly but surely the search party gets picked off. Will the few remaining survivors find out how to destroy this flesh-eating, bone-borrowing fiend?

What appears to be some supernatural force at work out in the lonely, hot desert is actually rather explainable. As the plot thickens, we discover that there is a scientific explanation as to what is going on under the desert sun, and it involves bugs (ants). The queen has been disturbed and now roams the desert in search of a new resting-place for her and her offspring. These are similar to the scarabs in "The Mummy" with a bit of a twist.

All in all, "The Bone Snatcher" is a fairly original, lower-budget "B" horror film. This movie is quite well done. The script was well thought-out, the story line is very cohesive, and all actors involved pulled it off rather well. Some of the characters were a little underdeveloped, but nonetheless it doesn't feel as though any huge plot elements were missing. In addition, it should be noted that some of the plot elements seem very cliche (the truck breaking down in the middle of nowhere, the radio being out), but that is what cheesy B horror flicks are all about. What, after all, would horror be without creating that sense of utter isolation?

Furthermore, the effects were great. Particularly the CGI creature effects. At no point in time did the film appear cheaply executed.

This movie won't make you jump, and won't get you utterly scared stiff, but it is great for some evening entertainment. Though not a great film, this is certainly a good film, and is very much worth watching if you can appreciate decent horror movies.

Rating:
Summary: Original and Noteworthy "B" Horror Flick
Review: Three people are out in the middle of the Namib Desert in Africa performing geologic surveys in hopes of discovering the next big diamond mine. When something unusual shows up in their readings, they decide to check it out. When the three never return to their home base to check in, others set out searching for them. Though the three missing individuals have only been out of contact for about 6 hours, the remains that are found seem picked almost dry. The search party sets out to find the one who killed their friends, and they realize all too soon that they are not up against any ordinary, human killer. Slowly but surely the search party gets picked off. Will the few remaining survivors find out how to destroy this flesh-eating, bone-borrowing fiend?

What appears to be some supernatural force at work out in the lonely, hot desert is actually rather explainable. As the plot thickens, we discover that there is a scientific explanation as to what is going on under the desert sun, and it involves bugs (ants). The queen has been disturbed and now roams the desert in search of a new resting-place for her and her offspring. These are similar to the scarabs in "The Mummy" with a bit of a twist.

All in all, "The Bone Snatcher" is a fairly original, lower-budget "B" horror film. This movie is quite well done. The script was well thought-out, the story line is very cohesive, and all actors involved pulled it off rather well. Some of the characters were a little underdeveloped, but nonetheless it doesn't feel as though any huge plot elements were missing. In addition, it should be noted that some of the plot elements seem very cliche (the truck breaking down in the middle of nowhere, the radio being out), but that is what cheesy B horror flicks are all about. What, after all, would horror be without creating that sense of utter isolation?

Furthermore, the effects were great. Particularly the CGI creature effects. At no point in time did the film appear cheaply executed.

This movie won't make you jump, and won't get you utterly scared stiff, but it is great for some evening entertainment. Though not a great film, this is certainly a good film, and is very much worth watching if you can appreciate decent horror movies.