Halloween - Resurrection

Rating:
Summary: Yep--It Sucks
Review: we all can agree that Halloween (1st one) was a great movie. but as the sequels went on, most the series arguably got worse (as with most movies). this is about as bad as it gets, folks. michael myers is just another jason vorhees in this film. myers has always been far ahead of Jason and the rest of the "slasher" genre killers, but this just stoops as low as "Jason X" (and thats pretty damn low). in this, myers returns to his old house as a group of horny teens are spending a night in there for a web-broadcasted reality show. with tyra banks and busta rhymes as part of the big production, you know this has got to suck. of course, myers ends up returning to his home to find all those dumb teenagers staying in his house for the cam show. michael comes in and ends up killing most of them. there isn't much more to this plot at all. just plain 'ol disapointing slasher cliches. the only reason this film is worth 2 stars (barely) is the beginning where michael breaks into the insane asylum and kills jamie lee curtis (yes, you heard right, she dies within the first 15 minutes). and i must admit, there was another part that was so pathetic and laughable that it was good. it was when busta ryhmes told michael myers, "trick or treat(...)but trust me, this film isn't even worth rent money. it looks like myers is going down the drain just like all the others in our favorite horror films.

Rating:
Summary: This was a good addition to the Halloween Series.
Review: A classic gets turned into Real World, Reality TV, TRASH. There are no good qualities to this movie. Jamie Lee Curtis shows her real colors by agreeing to be wrote off in this trash. I'm very disappointed, lame direction, lame writing, and Busta? I wonder if MTV is paying to get these no talent pop ikons into as many movies as they can? Bah... This movie isn't even worth Pirating.

Rating:
Summary: Children shouldn't play with Dead Things
Review: Michael Myers is dead. Why won't Halloween executive producer Moustapha Akkad let him rest in peace?

There is a moment, a brief, fleeting instant, in this unbelievably unenjoyable train-wreck of a movie, where Halloween:Resurrection actually creeps and crawls. It lasts about 30 seconds, so if you're fast forwarding through this unending yawnfest (and I used the fast-forward button early and often throughout Halloween:Resurrection) you might miss it.

A door opens, and the series's Shatner-mask wearing slasher glides through and into a shadowy room, butcher knife held aloft. Seconds later, the same door clicks open, and yet *another* Myers glides through, following the first; through the darkened, poorly lit rooms of the old Myers house they go, one following his twin like a shark. Creepy.

And really, with the exception of the opening sequence in an insane asylum (which dispatches poor heroine Jamie Lee Curtis with all the aplomb of a tailgate drunk squashing an ant), this scene, about 30 seconds long, is all the fun you're going to get out of this movie. And that's somewhat surprising, particularly given the success of its clever and refreshing little exercise in bloodlust "H20", to say nothing of the fact that "Resurrection" is helmed by director Rick Rosenthal, who was at the reins of the second Halloween installment.

Is it really that difficult to make an entertaining slasher flick, particularly if you've got a passle of libidinous teen-agers who are going to be spending the night in the old Myers house, now a rotten, crumbling derelict? Is it really that difficult, considering that the infamous serial killer, thought to have been beheaded by his sister in the previous film, has in fact fooled everybody, murdered his sister, and is now heading home for the holidays?

If the film in question is "Halloween:Resurrection", the answer is: it's pretty well nigh impossible. I went in with low expectations and a case of India Pale Ale, and all I wanted was a little spooky hack-n-slash, and perhaps a game of cat-in-mouse in the shadows.

I didn't even get one halfway decent kill. The movie's premise is as thin as this month's supermodel: a group of teens wins a contest to appear on an Internet reality show (original, huh?), which offers them the chance to spend the night in Michael Myers ruined house. Live through the night, get great door prizes!
Cameras are affixed throughout the house, and emcee/producer Busta Rhymes and his lovely assistant (played by supermodel Tyra Banks) load the house up with spooky goodies to scare the kids for the viewing pleasure of the home audience.

Busta Rhymes? Tyra Banks?

Never mind that, it's going to be the least of your worries. Michael Myers, of course, is loose in the house, and for about 30 minutes one entertains the hope that all sorts of wicked mayhem will ensue. For the love of Jason, you've got Busta Rhymes dressing up like Myers to scare the kiddies---surely they'll wise up to the ruse, and later confront the *real* Myers, only to get slaughtered, right?

Wrong. The most obvious set-up in the whole film doesn't happen. And worse still, despite the fact that a house-party-full of annoying teenagers has occupied his old home and hearth, Myers spends the first half of the movie just wandering around from room to room, killing---absolutely no one.

To recap: we have a listless & bored Michael Myers, we have a mask with big bushy eyebrows, we have Busta Rhymes and Tyra Banks, we have boring kills, we have lots of grainy Internet-cams that look worse than your home PC's camera unit, and---oh yes, don't let me forget---we have one of the house guest's friends, in attendance at another party, watching the festivities on *his* computer and making helpful I-pad suggestions, like: "HE'S IN THE HOUSE!", or better yet "HE'S STILL ALIVE!".

If your idea of horror movie fun is watching a screenful of drunken teenage idiots staring at a grainy computer screen and yelling "don't go in there" to the heroine, then you'll love "Halloween:Resurrection." Otherwise, the DVD makes a nice coaster for your drink while you're watching a real horror movie.

JSG



Rating:
Summary: The 850th Time He Came Home
Review: This is by far the worst entry in the series, including 'Halloween 6'. This time around, the producers try to rejuvenate the franchise by ripping off 'Blair Witch', killing Jamie Lee off in the beginning, and casting the worst actors in Hollywood.

The premise involves a group of stupid kids that willingly go along with a new program called "Dangertainment", created by Busta Rhymes, and get dropped off at the ol' Myers house for some late night fun. Basically "Dangertainment" is a reality program where cameras are placed all over the house, watching the kids, and it's broadcasted over the internet. So, then of course, Michael comes back home and kills everyone.

You know you're in trouble when the "trailer-line" (the line in the movie trailer that's supposed to grab you and make you want to go see the movie) is Busta Rhymes standing in fire intensely saying "Trick or treat, motherf*@#er." This movie has no suspense, no scary moments, no decent acting whatsoever, and not even a guilty pleasure feel. Just simply a waste of time.

Rating:
Summary: Busta Rhymes vs Micheal Myers in a Kung Fu Battle
Review: This is absolutely the worst movie ever. Dont get me wrong you will watch this movie and say, "its not worse than any other bad movie i've seen in my life." Until you get to the scene where Busta Rhymes confronts Micheal Myers, that scene alone is enough to put this movie up there as worst ever. Before I describe this scene let me start off by saying that I hope that whoever came up with the concept for this scene was fired and blacklisted from doing anymore movies. I mean who the hell thought of pitting Micheal Myers angainst Busta Rhymes. Ok, the battle starts of with Busta Rhymes talking some smack to Mr. Myers and then it happens.... Busta Rhymes fly kicks Micheal Myers ( sucessfully). Now alot of you might be thinking " ok it's over for Rhymes. He is dead." Well you would be very wrong because he delivers ANOTHER FLY KICK ( again successfully and this time complete with Bruce Lee sound effects). Micheal Myers goes flying out the window. Now I dont know about anyone else but if i was the director and someone said to me," Hey lets have Busta Rhymes fly kick Micheal Myers. TWICE!" I WOULD SLAP THE (...) OUT OF THAT PERSON!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS THE DUMBEST IDEA EVER, IT JUST DOESNT MAKE ANY DAMN SENSE. HOLLYWOOD IS GETTING RETARDED NOWADAYS!!! WHEN WILL THEY LEARN YOU DONT PUT BUSTA RHYMES IN A MOVIE!!!!!!!!!AND IF YOU DO!!!!! YOU MOST CERTAINLY DONT HAVE HIM ENGAGE MICHEAL MYERS IN A KUNG-FU BATTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In conclusion do not watch this movie.

Rating:
Summary: not what we would hope for but quite an entertaining movie
Review: well when i first saw this movie in cinemas i loved it because it was a hell of an experience which can not be denied, the score is excellent and creepy and we had some good violence and gore and some interesting new details about michael and his history. Ofcourse i to would have liked it if michael pursued his family and it would have made sense but look at it this way. Michael is under the curse of thorn and his body is playing host, he can sometimes fight the pain which is seen in some of the halloweens (if you haven't seen the other ones and/or don't know what i'm talking about then you're no-one to judge this film)so anyway i believe that michael went back home to grant him the serenity and to stop himself which is why he concreted himself in a room but one night the power of the curse was so strong that he went mad and just had to go to laurie to kill her to stop the pain and as far as these kids in his house goes michael feels invaded and goes into an all out rage. I definetley would've liked it if the baby or tommy or danny were in this but with the way movies are being made these days did you really have your hopes up?. Yes i to did not like busta rhymes in this movie especially the way he kicked michaels ass that annoyed me but this movie was definetley a good time and had some genuine frights in it.