The Five People You Meet in Heaven

Rating:
Summary: Wow buddy wow
Review: Hmm Randy Hamilton I wonder if you are refering to yourself in point 5. Talk about having no life.

Rating:
Summary: The Higher Road
Review: Once in awhile, a movie goes beyond entertainment to make us better for having witnessed it. This is one of those.

Eddie's life has been one of misery, regret, and failure. Then he dies, and is forced to face his demons. A touching work of such love and beauty that it may well leave you sobbing.

Rating:
Summary: Let me save you some time
Review: The five people you meet in are (in order of appearance):

1. Syndey Melmeck, an actuary from Amerherst, VA
2. Edith Burke-Hashire, a lady that for some reason, everyone who ever lived has seen in the grocery store at least once
3. A guy who looks like, but isn't, Martin Van Buren
4 and 5: A middle-aged couple from New Jersey who are hopelessly lost on their way to an "Arby's".

To be honest, it seems like kind of a scam to write a whole book, and then make a whole movie, about the five people you meet in Heaven when a simple list like this would have been adequate. I mean, people are probably expecting the five people to be celebrities, deceased friends, lost loves, or at the very least, someone they've actually heard of. But nope, it's just these five dolts, and they're apparently just as clueless about what's going on as all the dead people are. According to the book, none of them even have some gum to offer! Although to be fair, in chapter 17 the author starts to voice his suspicions that the Martin Van Buren-looking guy actually does have some gum and is hording it; but then 23 pages later he drops the theory as being totally unfounded and probably a result of his own boredom.

Now, one problem with an author having a big sucess with a well-known title, is that afterwards they rarely are content to go back to their previous job waiting tables when the first book stops selling. Like, remember that guy who wrote, "The Seven Habits of Highly Sucessful People"? Well, he just came out with a sequel called, predictively enough, "No wait, there were 8 Habits!!!". And that means that, when "The Five People You Meet in Heaven" stops selling, this author will undoubtedly begin work on the book, "The Five People You Meet in Hell".

So, just to save you yet another disappointing experience, let me give you the skinny on who those folks are as well. They are:

1,2, and 3: That annoying couple and their squaling infant who sat behind in in coach on your 7AM flight to Hell out of O'Hare.
4: A really interesting guy, who in fact never shows up
5: Some goofy bastard who likes to write reviews of books and movies he's never seen.

Thanks, and I hope this review was helpful.