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Charlie's Angels

Charlie's Angels

List Price: $19.95
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Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Michelle Yeoh does it better......
Review: Bad script, bad action, and bad acting. What were they thinking? The best thing about this film was the opening when fans got to see the stunning Jacklyn Smith -- who still looks better than all the actresses in this film. Even Michele Yeoh does all her stunts while these ladies need a wire to hoist their heavy, out-of-shape bottoms off the ground. So much for reality in American fight films.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Recipe for Cinematic Disaster:
Review: 1) Take three Flavor-of-the-Month no-talent starlets
2) Mix in a juvenile, uninspired attempt at parody for a script
3) Season with hip, MTV video-style direction
4) Sprinkle on an appearance by Tom Green

Serve up the resulting waste of celluloid for every 14-year-old female teen awash in late-'90's Spice Girl "Grrl Power" faux-esteem. Watch, as I did, late at night on HBO when you're too tired even to expend energy on channel surfing. Keep some Pepto-bismal nearby.

When the original TV Chuck's Cherubs was aired in the '70's I was going through puberty and eagerly tuned-in for biological reasons (with latent visions of tight bell-bottom leisure slacks and the Farrah haircut I'm sure even now operating as a cornerstone stimulant). Given my age and the medium, plots and acting ability were certainly a non-factor. In this respect I can at least say the recent Hollywood "adaptation" follows in lock-step, for I'm sure there are some zit-riddled pubescent boys who'll gaze upon this "Charlie's Angels" exercise in kitschy T & A as libido-forming as Jackie, Katie and Farrah were for me.

Apparently, according to those who profess such insight, the highbrow elements lacking in the television show were what prompted the production of this big-screen embarassment; an exercise in parodying sexual camp, unbelievable characters and over-the-top action. It just doesn't work.

The problem is, even upon re-viewing it through 21st century sensibilities, the TV show wasn't THAT campy, the characters THAT unbelievable, or the action THAT over-the-top. Bad, perhaps -- maybe even VERY bad -- but certainly there were worse products of the time ("Dukes of Hazzard" comes to mind -- and I wouldn't doubt that some feeble-minded Hollywood stooge is at this moment fielding offers for a full-blown cinematic re-make of THAT landmark in television history). Sure, we can peek back from our current irony-constructed perches and leer at the blundering entertainment that made its way onto the TV screen in the past and make fun. That's easy because, gosh, we're so much more sophisticated and aware and sensitive nowadays and . . . well, Tom Green is only the exception. But still, how KEWL to point all this out for the kiddies of today! How revealing to show the teens that what passed for entertainment in their parent's day was utterly laughable! We filmmakers in 2001 will demonstrate by making an equally horrendous parody (and as an unwitting result, reveal something about our clueless selves). News flash: if parodying something you feel is laughably bad results in a sickeningly bad product, you've pretty much condemmed the entire notion to conceptual limbo.

In effect, I simply just don't believe those little Johnnies and Jennies that the new-fangled "Charlie's Angels" was meant to appeal to can actually GET IT, since they were barely a concept in Mom & Dad's future outlook when the television show was in full bloom. Even if watching a re-run of the original today, it ain't the same experience. Context makes a whopping difference.

Then again, perhaps the film just annoyed me to the brink of colon pain because if I see ONE MORE action movie utilizing unbelievable Wire Fu fight scenes, I'll heave.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: "Oh....My....God!"
Review: This film is so bad in every way it actually makes "Plan 9 From Outer Space" look like "Citizen Kane!"

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: ACTION MIXED UP WITH BEAUTYS
Review: This a great action comedy film with great especial effects and beautiful girls.
Drew, Cameron, Lucy, Bill Murray and Tim Curry(WOW!WHAT A CAST!).
The girls have to rescue a young man to save Charlie's life.
Even a big explotion hit them, they will always look espectacular.
It's only a not serious, fun, action movie.
Don't you miss it!
BYE!!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: A blast in every sense
Review: The new take on the old 1970s television show that introduced "jiggle TV" to America has it all. It's exciting with great stunts. It's funny with three women who know a good joke when they tell one and what else can you say about Bill Murray. It's sexy. Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore and Lucy Liu at their most beautiful and sexiest. This movie truly rocks. If you never thought an action movie starring women would work, take a look at this one. I can't get enough of it. It has all the same elements of the television show, only everything is much, much, much better. The script did get a little weak, but you hardly even notice. The direction is fast and furious and the photography is second to none. All three ladies look great all the time just as they should in a movie like this. They are hot, funny and exciting. Don't miss it.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Don't pass this over--it's pure fun!
Review: What a fun movie!

This pretends to be nothing more than what it is, a summer escapist film. Fighting, humor, innuendo, gadgets, and plenty of cleavage--it has it all!

Cameron Diaz is a joy as the childlike Natalie, while Lucy Liu's Alex is all knuckles and know-how. Drew Barrymore is Drew through and through--sexy, streetwise, and sweet. Bill Murray is wasted, however, as Bosley; his character is all fatherly advice, costume changes, and pratfalls.

With high-kicking Hong Kong style action and great visuals, if you are looking for a fun flick to pass a Saturday night, don't pass over this one. It's a best bet.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: WARNING: This movie may make you hurl!
Review: The movie may also cause you to question what planet the characters are living in with all the exaggerated gravity defying fight scenes. This is absolutely, positively the WORST MOVIE EVER. Dodge this movie like your life depended on it. Word to the wise

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Hollywod Fluff
Review: I don't like this movie because these girls are to beautiful to be action hero. Cameron Diaz's legs are too long. It's not a serious movie. It was rather boring and I couldn't get emotionally involved with the plot or the characters.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Yikes!!
Review: Horrible! Charlie's Angels made Pop Culture from within not the other way around.this is like a Bad USA Network Film on the Weekend at 2 in the Morning.bad acting&tired cliched Matrix type effects.one of those Movies that it was so bad you laughed at all the wrong parts.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Bad
Review: One-half hour into this movie I guessed the entire plot - what little there was of one. Charlie swears his Angels are brilliant but there's nothing to back that here. Lots of cleavage and action, if you like movies like this, so be it. It was bad if you ask me.


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