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My Life With Morrissey

My Life With Morrissey

List Price: $19.95
Your Price: $17.96
Product Info Reviews

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Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Amazon, Can I Have my Money Back, PLEASE?
Review: I'm serious. I can't believe I paid my hard earned cash to buy this movie. I should have been paid for the torture and wasted time. Now, I can't even get $3 for it at a store that buys used DVDs. It's not fair. Down right bad movie.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Funny and wild, sharp comedy
Review: Not for the faint of heart, this wild and original take on fan-aticism is just what a lot of Morrissey fans need, but might not want! Some brilliant bits include the infamous lesbian school girl assault and the co-worker from hell's prison diatribe. Shot at Nickelodeon's offices and also includes a great cast and crew commentary. Lead character's performance is amazing, gutsy, and not to be missed. Good slide show and outtake special features. Not for everyone, only those who like to laugh and understand that anyone is fair game because we're all in this together.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Perhaps the worst movie I've ever seen
Review: Summary:
Jackie (Jackie Buscarino) is arguably the biggest Morrissey fan in the world. Her apartment is a shrine (quite literally) to Morrissey and all she can think about is being with him. Her life consists of going to work at some dead end, nameless job, and hunting down Morrissey to get him to marry her. These two elements and their eventual clash are pretty much the entire movie.

At some point in her search for Morrissey Jackie is given a tip that he may have been at some bar. When she goes there looking for him, she ends up finding a tofu hot dog she believes may have been his. Upon this realization, she then performs fellatio on the hot dog as though it were Morrissey. Eventually someone shows up, whether or not it is actually Morrissey is never really revealed and drives her home. But the important part is that she thinks this is Morrissey.

This event sets off some sort of trigger in Jackie's mind which leads to her ultimate descent into insanity as she now believes she is dating and engaged to Morrissey. Her fantasies begin to merge with reality and she eventually ends up in a mental hospital.

My Comments:
Sometimes I joke about how a movie is painful to watch. Generally I use that reference metaphorically. This movie was not metaphorically painful to watch, it was intellectually and emotionally painful to watch. There is only one redeeming quality about this movie - I actually got to the point to where I was laughing at how incredibly stupid it was. No, I wasn't laughing at the pathetic attempts at humor. I wasn't even laughing at the people that were laughing in the film. I was simply laughing because the movie was soooo bad that the only way to cope with it was to laugh.

So, how was the acting? Have you seen 'Plan 9 From Outer Space'? This movie made the acting in that one look like the acting from 'Road to Perdition'. It really was that bad. There wasn't one good character. Jackie Buscarino should be blacklisted and forced to take a job like the one her character had; never again should she even have a part in a film. The rest of the actors seemed to be actual employees that worked where Jackie worked. They either over-acted, or didn't act at all. It was abhorable. The cast should be locked in a room and forced to watch 'Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle' over and over again for 6 months - torture this filth out of them.

What about the story? If anything, this is a mockery of people's actual descent into insanity. No one goes insane like this. This was pure trash. Even if you give the film dramatic license and extreme suspension of belief, at some point the absurdity of it all becomes so overwhelming that you just have to give up.

Finally, let me see if I can highlight some of the more forgettable moments of the film. There was that one scene where Jackie is raped by four high school girls behind a dumpster. Or how about the fellatio on the hot dog, that was a real winner. Or perhaps Jackie's repeated forays with a vibrator in bed, that was really interesting. But I think my favorite scene was Jackie being fed by her 'boyfriend' Ed (Eduardo Acosta), while living in a box in back of her former place of employment - yeah, definitely the Jackie in the Box, that was the winner.

Overall, I think I can sum this movie up with two things that occurred during the movie. ... this is one of the worst movies ever made. ... For your own sake and sanity, DO NOT WATCH THIS FILM!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: My Review of "My Life With Morrissey"
Review: Talk about CAMP.

This movie made John Waters films look like something from DISNEY...

To say that it was "over-the-top" would be the understatement of the new millennium to say the least...

It started with a shot of the heroine, Jackie, sprawled out in her bedroom waking up to a new day with her many Morrissey posters, pins, pictures and assorted other memorabilia scattered about. She gets ready for work and kisses all of her Moz pics on the way out the door- and then comes back in and gives a hint of what is to come throughout the film buy lunging back into the frame and tonguing the posters with relish... the initial shock of the audience never really wore off as her downward spiral of obsession is graphically displayed in alarming detail. The characters in her office are equally violently over-acted: you could tell everyone had a riot filming this, holding absolutely NOTHING back.

Things REALLY got racey once she finally meets Moz (played by a Sweet and Tender Hooligan, Jose Maldonado, who kept his "cameo" part filmed last Summer a secret from EVERYONE- including his own Smiths/Morrissey tribute band- until word leaked out a few days before the first screening). She goes around the known Moz haunts around L.A. religiously until her odyssey leads her to a HOT DOG STAND where the Pope of Mope apparently was eating a tofu dog. She doesn't see him at first but she does see the meatless weenie and proceeds to felate it unaware that he is watching from afar- and to her amazement: appears and offers her a ride home.

From here the film goes REALLY psycho.... She is now convinced that she is engaged to him and the fantasies get even more bizarre, if that's possible, including vibrators, inflatable love dolls with Moz' face plastered on them, and slippery shower heads. Fortunately all of the self-love sex is implied and thus keeps this film out of the porn section.

Her return to the office is even more outrageous as she literally goes postal on her co-workers. Just when you think she can't push the envelope any further: it's hurled with fascinating abandon. This was a car wreck that one simply couldn't take one's eyes away from- WHAT INSANE THING WILL HAPPEN NEXT?

A tour-de-force in extreme acting and dialogue. A MUST-SEE for low-budget Indie film lovers that have any shred of an interest in the Cult of Morrissey.

Enjoy.

Jay

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Not your typical Hollywood Fare
Review: This is a cool film. I caught it when it played in Silverlake. The characters are so funny. The story is completely over the top. I was so happy to see something other than the typical Hollywood formula film.

The photography is awesome. And the makeup is cool too. My favorite scene is with the blow-up doll with Morrissey's photo taped on it. I'm a Moz fan, but at least I can be proud that I'm not as far gone as Jackie. She is a riot.

If you want to see an example of good storytelling and filmmaking that dares to step outside the box you should see this film.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Movie Only Good for Nap Time
Review: This is a real yawn fest. After the main character walks in front of her place of work for the 100th time and says the same "catch phrases" a 1,000 times, my eyelids could not control themselves any longer. The DVD extras weren't much better. There was a makeshift documentary about Morrissey fans and commentary from people involved with the film. I don't even know what they did or who they were but the makeup artist sticks clearly in my mind. I don't think the main characters were even in the room for this "special feature." Boring and Lame.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Movie Only Good for Nap Time
Review: This is a real yawn fest. After the main character walks in front of her place of work for the 100th time and says the same "catch phrases" a 1,000 times, my eyelids could not control themselves any longer. The DVD extras weren't much better. There was a makeshift documentary about Morrissey fans and commentary from people involved with the film. I don't even know what they did or who they were but the makeup artist sticks clearly in my mind. I don't think the main characters were even in the room for this "special feature." Boring and Lame.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Movie Only Good for Nap Time
Review: This is a real yawn fest. After the main character walks in front of her place of work for the 100th time and says the same "catch phrases" a 1,000 times, my eyelids could not control themselves any longer. The DVD extras weren't much better. There was a makeshift documentary about Morrissey fans and commentary from people involved with the film. I don't even know what they did or who they were but the makeup artist sticks clearly in my mind. I don't think the main characters were even in the room for this "special feature." Boring and Lame.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: the BESTEST FILM EVERRRRR!!!!!!!
Review: this is an absolute MUST SEE for both the morrissey-obsessed and morrissey-hater... Jackie Buscarino and Eduardo Acosta are hillarious!!!!!!!!! i think i could watch this movie 100 times over.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: JUST SAY NO!!!!!
Review: This movie is atrocious!! It took away several (or at least FELT like several) hours of my life that I will never ever get back. I really am a Morrissey fan, but this movie makes a mockery of all things Moz - and not in a good way.
Don't waste your time with this one. Honestly, the only individuals who might moderately enjoy this film are family members & close friends of those involved in the making of it. The writing is bad & the "acting" is even worse. Don't waste your time. I can't say it enough! It's an embarrassment and just AWFUL in every sense of the word. Don't waste your time - SERIOUSLY! I took one for the team on this one. Save yourself!!!


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