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Laser Mission

Laser Mission

List Price: $4.95
Your Price: $4.95
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Rating: 2 stars
Summary: wrong title..2 star movie
Review: Brandon Lee is good and he always is but he never should of done this movie..this movie seems like a James Bond attempt..though Lee has some good fights it just doesnt add up till the ridiculous ending...like i said before..RENT THE CROW!!!!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Brandon Lee, a short-lived superstar, even in this movie
Review: Brandon Lee, like his father (ironically) died too young; just as his father Bruce Lee, Brandon is exciting to watch even in this early debut -- revealing his lightning fast moves. He moves and walks so much like his father it's strange. This film is good, Brandon makes the movie, it doesn't make him. A rare treat for both Bruce and Brandon Lee fans.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: WHAT A SAD JOKE
Review: First the sound, well its 'pcm' at a very high distorted level, pic-quality? put is like this - its a cheap old movie copied complete with old film scratches onto dvd, some of the acting is ok but the action is thin, for the money well maybe buy it, but you sure will not be watching this movie often.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: This is a "Must Miss" extraveganza!
Review: If you're a Brandon/Bruce Lee fan to the core, just buy this thing, watch it once and be done (Kind of like watching Game of Death only you don't feel tremendously violated after watching it). I saw this movie last year and even though I cringed, it was good to see the late Brandon Lee in something that was "new" to me. If you want a cookie cutter action flick with a bad romance plot, this is the one for you! Also, if you want to be amazed at how many bullets can actually miss an action hero, then this INDEED is the one for you! Believe you me, the sheer amount of bullets that miss Brandon will make your head spin. Talk about point blank!

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Laser Mission Review
Review: It's a classic 80's U.S. vs. U.S.S.R flick, unfortunately, it was made after the Soviet Union collapsed. Beau Davis' poor selection of plot and sub-plot leave the viewer wondering not only the background of the characters, but the future of them as well. Brandon Lee plays Michael Gold, a 007 wanna-be, whose luck with flying projectiles rivals only that of the Road Runner. Granted, it is nice to see Lee in another movie besides his well known (The Crow and Rapid Fire), but one can easily see why this movie didn't captivate the audience. His acting ability doesn't show at all, as if he simple walked through the set reading his lines off teleprompters. Ernest Borgnine acting never seems to grow passed that of a childs, and Debi Monahan, whose more popular appearance being in 1991's Shattered with Tom Beringer, shows little talent when it comes to the silver screen, but weilds a gun and high heels as Lee's secretive partner. My suggestion when it comes down to this movie, wait til it comes out on A.B.C. or N.B.C. or another TV station that costs you nothing to watch. Rating TV...

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Laser Mission Review
Review: It's a classic 80's U.S. vs. U.S.S.R flick, unfortunately, it was made after the Soviet Union collapsed. Beau Davis' poor selection of plot and sub-plot leave the viewer wondering not only the background of the characters, but the future of them as well. Brandon Lee plays Michael Gold, a 007 wanna-be, whose luck with flying projectiles rivals only that of the Road Runner. Granted, it is nice to see Lee in another movie besides his well known (The Crow and Rapid Fire), but one can easily see why this movie didn't captivate the audience. His acting ability doesn't show at all, as if he simple walked through the set reading his lines off teleprompters. Ernest Borgnine acting never seems to grow passed that of a childs, and Debi Monahan, whose more popular appearance being in 1991's Shattered with Tom Beringer, shows little talent when it comes to the silver screen, but weilds a gun and high heels as Lee's secretive partner. My suggestion when it comes down to this movie, wait til it comes out on A.B.C. or N.B.C. or another TV station that costs you nothing to watch. Rating TV...

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: It's funny for the wrong reasons.
Review: Of all my time spent on Friday night watching a movie or two, one time was quite rememberable. Enjoyable so. I put in this movie into my DVD player, hoping to see some Brandon Lee class and exciting action, but in this little gem we saw his satirical side. The whole movie was a thrill ride, that frankly, didn't end, and made me want to puke. I'm not sure if the puke came from the absense of acting, staging, plot transitions, wit, generativity, a budget above triple digits, or the little game me and my buds played during the course of the movie. We called it "Take A Shot of Beer Every Time A White Dot or Square Appears on the Top Right Hand Corner of the Screen Or We Catch Glimpses of the Stage Crew". One drunk night...

Some one explain to me how they got from Cuba to South Africa. Hell, since realism isn't a factor in that movie, I suspect they drove. This movie also seems to defy medical science, since anyone beat-up/crushed/shot full of two clips/centered in explosion will obviously live, until they are droven into a magical brick wall.

I've said enough, and to end, I say "Watch this movie".

Its funny for the wrong reasons.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Not much of a try.
Review: The plot is not much, but the acting is really poor, slightly above college theatre. On the other hand, the kids try hard, the scenery is real for whatever that is worth, and the violence and "sex" is soft enough for 12 year olds, so for... you've got something to engross the kiddies on the long flights.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Not much of a try.
Review: This is beyond question the worst movie ever created by a human being. I have never seen anything that I consider to be more poorly done. The entirety of the movie's budget seems to have been spent on casting Ernest Borgnine - which is fortunate, as none of the other "actors" are the least bit capable, except Brandon Lee, who clearly isn't even trying. I've seen better cinematography from camcorders. Also, the "special" effects are questionable at best, the chase scene has all the enthusiasm of a college student eating ramen noodles cooked a week prior, and at some point, they manage to get from Cuba to somewhere in Africa without ever telling the audience. Furthermore, the female "lead" has a most amazing item: a isappearing-reappearing bra. Though her clothing only comes off once (off camera), her bra, as near as we the viewer can tell, is present only every other scene. It disgusts me that this movie was ever released, and the fact that it is now on DVD, where it will never biodegrade, makes me weep for humanity's future.

However.

This is by far the most ludicrously fun cinematic experience I have *ever* had, and I heartily endorse making unsuspecting fools watch this movie. If you can stomach it.

Good luck.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: The Worst Movie Ever!
Review: This is beyond question the worst movie ever created by a human being. I have never seen anything that I consider to be more poorly done. The entirety of the movie's budget seems to have been spent on casting Ernest Borgnine - which is fortunate, as none of the other "actors" are the least bit capable, except Brandon Lee, who clearly isn't even trying. I've seen better cinematography from camcorders. Also, the "special" effects are questionable at best, the chase scene has all the enthusiasm of a college student eating ramen noodles cooked a week prior, and at some point, they manage to get from Cuba to somewhere in Africa without ever telling the audience. Furthermore, the female "lead" has a most amazing item: a isappearing-reappearing bra. Though her clothing only comes off once (off camera), her bra, as near as we the viewer can tell, is present only every other scene. It disgusts me that this movie was ever released, and the fact that it is now on DVD, where it will never biodegrade, makes me weep for humanity's future.

However.

This is by far the most ludicrously fun cinematic experience I have *ever* had, and I heartily endorse making unsuspecting fools watch this movie. If you can stomach it.

Good luck.


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