Swordfish

Rating:
Summary: Bad as John Travolta's Haircut
Review: At the beginning of this film, John Travolta's character talks about "Dog Day Afternoon." If you haven't seen this Sidney Lumet classic about bank robbery, watch it first because it delivers 1000 times better viewing experience. Oh, by the way, he talks about the lack of reality in recent Hollywood movies. You can find that in "Dog Day Afternoon," too.

To be fair, "Swordfish" is an action-packed movie, so it certainly gives many action scenes. But how? Of course, blowing a bomb, shooting the scene with the 360 degree "time-slice" camerawork which is, to old moviegoers like me, only a recycled idea of the much superb "Matrix." (And it was produced by Joel Silver, the same as "Swordfish." Surprise!)

Well, I know we need a certain degree of suspending disbelief, but "Swordfish" handles potentially very serious matter so carelessly that even its praised opening scenes only leave a nasty taste in your mouth. And though I am not a devoted PC believer, Halle Berry's character, who exists just to bare breasts, looks as if she exists to show how to waste a good talent in Hollywood. Anyone who have seen her in "Losing Isaiah" (fine work, indeed) should know she can really act much better than in this terrible mess.

Though I admit that stunt people are doing great jobs, and Hugh Jackman proves that he is one of the talented young actors of his generation with his good acting, their works are put aside for the sake of big explosions, meaningless nudity, and the awfully bad haircut of John Travolta. And someone tell me, what is Sam Shepard doing in it?

This is basically a forgettable movie, but that doesn't matter. I understand there are many people who are willing to defend this film on the ground that it is just a fun; they could enjoy it, and saying don't be serious. I'm not. I just want to point out that there are many other by far better films out there (how about "Speed"?) and with all respect to those who are involved in this movie, we movie fans know that John Travolta, Hugh Jackman, and especailly Don Cheadle are all wasting their precious talent. (Just think, how directors like Quention Tarantino would make a movie with this fabulous cast?) Surely "Swordfish" is better than "Battlefield Earth," but that doesn't mean much.

Rating:
Summary: Objectively Good
Review: Great Special Effects (Great Sound) and Halle Berry too. Yes she probably felt it degrading, on the other hand she is one of the most beautiful women to ever be born, a vision out of reach for us mere mortals. On behalf of the ordinary male population: "Thank You very much for your sacrifice!"

Rating:
Summary: inane, foolish film
Review: Makers of mediocre movies are just going to have to learn that they can't go around drawing idle comparisons between their own product and much better earlier films without having their own suffer by comparison. Articulating such an analogy merely conjures up fond memories of the earlier film in the audience's mind, pointing up the inferiority of the current work at hand. Take the case of "Swordfish," a laughably bad bank heist tale that has the temerity, in its opening scene, to criticize Sidney Lumet's great 1975 classic "Dog Day Afternoon" for being too unrealistic and for catering to the audience's need to see goodness triumph over evil (the makers of this film have done such a shoddy job at research that they actually err in pinpointing the other film's release date - citing it as 1976 rather than 1975). All this from a film that boasts not a single believable moment and, indeed, works overtime trying to strain credibility (perhaps that's the point and the whole shebang is simply a sick joke - a possibility that, come to think of it, becomes more and more likely, given the stupidity of some of the plot turns we are asked to swallow).

Like so many thrillers these days, "Swordfish" tries to dazzle us with an array of complicated looking computer hardware. It isn't enough anymore for a band of robbers to storm their way into a bank, wave a few guns, take a handful of frightened hostages and hunker down for the duration, giving the authorities conniption fits with their exorbitant demands. No, for now the robbers have to precede these activities with a good 75 minutes of computer downloading and money transferring. John Travolta plays yet another of his stock villain characters, this time as a deranged, anti-terrorist megalomaniac named Gabriel Shear who will stop at nothing to "maintain America's freedoms," even if it means committing crimes, subverting the Constitution and murdering all innocent and not so innocent people who get in his way. One would think that tackling such a subject would give the film a veneer of topicality in the wake of the events of September 11th. On the contrary, the reality of that day only helps to underscore the absurdity and stupidity of the film's cartoonish view of both terrorism and the methods necessary to combat it. It also doesn't help that the film comes replete with some of the most laughably bad (and badly photographed) action stunt sequences to show up in a movie in a long long time, including a ludicrous car chase and shootout along the streets of West LA and a final sequence involving a bus literally flying over downtown Los Angeles that should be in some sort of hall of infamy for bad action scene ideas.

Hugh Jackman plays Stanley Jobson, a "retired" computer hacker just paroled from a stint in the big house, who allows himself to be coerced into joining Gabriel's motley crew of computer-geek assassins. Having just endured "Blow" a few weeks ago, I was not prepared for yet another film featuring a "sympathetic," desperate-to-reform criminal who is willing to return to a life of crime in order to secure custody of the little daughter he loves. The parallels in their situations are simply uncanny and one begins to wonder what one finds more objectionable about these two characters: their soft-heartedness or their soft-headedness. Halle Berry portrays the stereotypical smooth, icy-cool criminal sexpot who (ho hum) may or may not be what she seems. Not that that really matters much in the absurd closing sequences of the film, where all logic, credibility and good old fashioned common sense are cavalierly thrown out the window and we are left scratching our heads in bewildered amazement wondering just what exactly transpired that our little pea brains didn't get. When a film refuses to play by any rules related to the laws of the real world, we have every right to laugh it off the screen.

Which brings us back to "Dog Day Afternoon," a film that, even a quarter of a century after it was made, still has the power to draw us into its world and make us care passionately about both its situation and its characters. I guarantee that will never be said about "Silverfish," not today, not twenty-five years from now, not ever. You guys should only be so lucky.

Rating:
Summary: This movie is like John Travolta's haircut...
Review: ...bad. What a waste of time, talent and money. It throws in everything but the kitchen sink: machine guns, rocket launchers, car crashes, big explosions, stylish clothes, computer hacking, Travolta's recycled "Broken Arrow" villian schtick, hackneyed dialogue/situations, nudity, etc. But where's the feeling behind it, I ask? You couldn't care a lick about any of the characters or their motives. No more can be said. Avoid like the plague.

Rating:
Summary: What a mess
Review: This is a film created by committee. It's a film that tries to be everything all at the same time, doing nothing well, and creating a storyline that is unbelievable, stupid and frankly boring.

There are far too many, so called, "exciting" action scenes that lead nowhere except to try and break up the monotony of the laughable storyline.

See Sneakers instead.

Rating:
Summary: A mixed bag.....
Review: This movie has action, suspense, plot twists, computer hacking, and John Travolta. So, how can it miss? Perhaps by overdoing the action, suspense, plot twists, etc. etc., it becomes almost a parody of the genre. But, if you like that sort of thing, suspend your disbelief for 90 minutes and enjoy! Travolta's character is a badguy/goodguy who thinks that the ends justify the means. In his supposed quest to defend his country he resorts to mayhem, murder, extortion, and any other tool which will support his goals. He hires a convicted computer hacker to transfer a large amount of money to support his activites and lures him into working for him by promising him custody of his 10-year-old daughter, who lives with his ex-wife. Most of the plot is pretty unbelievable, but things sort themselves out and a little plot twist at the end leaves you scratching your head.

Rating:
Summary: The elitists strike again
Review: Well, it's no surprise that a majority of movie critics panned this movie. Typical lines like, "This movie made absolutely no sense," and "all style no substance" seemed to be the ones that were written most by critics. But I find it all so tiresome, Swordfish is a good action movie. It doesn't try and make some point on the culture or be realistic, it is an action movie and they are made for one thing and one thing alone, entertainment. After so many boring action movies this year, Tomb Raider and Planet of the Apes come to mind. It is refreshing to see a nice hyper-violent testosterone driven gunfire fest, that has some snappy dialogue and pretty decent performances. I love the opening of this movie, Travolta's tirade about movies sucked me in immediately, it was well-written and rose above most other tripe that tries to make light of other movies. No real need to go into the other characters, suffice it to say, misdirection seems to be the name of the game with this movie. But I was thoroughly entertained the entire running time, and I can't say that about much these days.

Rating:
Summary: I just laughed.
Review: "Swordfish" is one of the worst movies I've seen in a long time. I went to see it because my stupid friend thought it looked cool(...). First of all, the plot is just one giant movie cliche: The computer genius having to hack in to the DOD while having a gun pointed at his head and getting oral pleasure at the same time, John Travolta randomly getting up in his convertible with huge guns and blasting people, gratuitous breast shots... By the time we got to the part where they make a getaway on the school bus, my friend next to me just kept repeating, "This is so bad. This is so bad." When they got the helicopter to lift up the bus, I told myself they weren't really going to do something so stupid, but they did. The helicopter lifts up the bus???? And the end is almost worse. All in all, I hate this movie. I might actually get it though, just for a good laugh(...).

Rating:
Summary: SWORDFISH SMELLS
Review: Overexposed John Travolta is back in another theatrical mess. "Swordfish" is one of the worst films of 2001, and should win a Rasberry Award for Best Picture come this year.

It seems as Travoltas movie career goes full steam ahead he keeps picking more and more horrible films like his Battlefield Earth sci-film of last season, Domestic Disturbance, and the list goes on.

Hugh Jackman is unbelievable, Halle Berry couldn't act if her looks depended on it, and the production and script are so weak.

AWFUL, AWFUL, AWFUL. Travolta owes it to his fans to get back on track like "Pulp Fiction", "Get Shorty", etc., or just don't do films at all, your rich enough.

Rating:
Summary: gotta love John
Review: it wasn't as action packed as i though it would be....but when there was action...it was out there. C4 and metal ball berrings straped to your chest...flying buses...it's mostly mental action....then explosive action. But still a very good movie. John Travolta still can pull off a good movie.