They Call Me Bruce?

Rating:
Summary: Knock Down Drag 'em out Laughs
Review: Bruce gets himself into all sorts of pricarious situations - each one funnier than the previous. Most of my friends will tell you that it's not easy to make me laugh...but this movie dispelled that myth in the opening sequence! Granted, I didn't finish watching the whole thing....but I highly recommend buying it! I haven't seen this kind of comedic delivery from a character since "Barky" in the Never Ending Story III.

Rating:
Summary: hahahorrible
Review: I have to say that the fact I found this movie saddens me

Rating:
Summary: "Do you like sushi like I like sushi?"
Review: It's interesting how time can change one's perspective on things. Certain films, viewed again after many years, hold up well, allowing for a more mature eye to pick up on certain aspects missed during the initial viewing, finding even more enjoyment (Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is a good example). Those films usually contain a timeless quality, one that doesn't deteriorate with the passage of time. Some films, on the other hand, aren't so lucky, but that's not necessarily a bad thing as they can be seen to represent the capturing of a certain period of time, allowing for a comparative look from where we were to where we are. They Call Me Bruce? (1982) sort of falls into the latter group, for me at least, as while I have fond, yet murky, memories seeing it on cable back in the early 80's, viewing it now, makes me realize that maybe this one would have been better left in the past, something not really worthy of reliving.

Someone not really worth mentioning directed this rather anemic spoof, but I will say there are four writers listed in the credits (including the star Johnny Yune), all of whom have since moved on to other aspects of the film business, obviously realizing writing wasn't their forte. The film stars the affable Johnny Yune (The Cannonball Run, They Still Call Me Bruce) and features appearances by Pam Huntington (Force Five), Raf `sometimes known as Ralph' Mauro (Beach Balls), and Margaux Hemingway (Lipstick, Double Obsession), granddaughter to the famous writer Ernest Hemingway, and sister of actress Mariel Hemingway. An interesting side note...Margaux, like her grandfather, is believed to have committed suicide in the mid-90's, some say after two failed marriages, alcohol problems, and a failed career, but her sister Mariel contends her sister didn't kill herself, but rather passed due to an epileptic seizure....but I digress...

So any way, Johnny Yune plays Bruce, a man, sent to America as a young boy, after his grandfather passes, to find a woman, his grandfather's lost love, in order that she would care for him. Bruce has a scroll describing the whereabouts of the woman, who's in New York, but he's stuck in Los Angeles, working as a cook for a local Italian mob. The mob's involved with the distribution of drugs, and has been negatively impacted by federal agencies and so they turn to Bruce, believing he has martial arts skills after he manages to foil a local robbery, conning him into delivering cocaine, believing it's a special Chinese flour. As Bruce is making the deliveries across America, eventually leading him to New York, allowing him to fulfill his grandfather's last wishes, he's hounded by various gangland elements, hitmen, and law enforcement agencies, enduring all kinds of comic mishaps and situations, eventually leading up to a meeting with the Boss of Bosses (seriously, that's what they call him in the movie), not knowing that the drugs he's carrying, which he thinks is flour, has really been switched to flour...

I, as many I think, have remembered this film kindly, but seeing it now, it seems very dated, and really not that funny. During my recent viewing, it came off as more of a curious oddity, filled with stereotypes (not really mean-spirited ones), excruciatingly lame jokes `I am a sex object...I always ask women for sex, and they object.' [insert rimshot here], and very mild slapstick comedy. Yune does possess a certain amount of charm and likeability, but the film was just so cornball it's hour and a half run time felt much longer. His character is referred to as Bruce throughout the film, in reference to Bruce Lee (only because they're both Asian), as he bumbles from one situation to another, seemingly his ignorance being his protection. The film seems more of a vehicle for Yune's bad jokes (his is a mixture between Henny Youngman and Rodney Dangerfield, but not as good), just like any of these sitcoms nowadays featuring popular comedians are created to allow the comedians to peddle their material (watch the first year of The Drew Carey Show, and see how obvious this aspect is). With the latter, there's usually time for the jokes to meld seamlessly into the stories and characters, but with a film, we don't really have that kind of time for development, so the lame jokes really stick out between the awkwardly constructed story and scenes. The one bright spot, as another has already mentioned is Pam Huntington, who started her career in 70's television commercials, appeared in a few films (this being her last) before falling off the Hollywood radar in obscurity. Her acting wasn't notable, but she's nice to look at...the other female lead, Margaux Hemingway, gave me the creeps, as she always exuded a very unnerving masculine tone due to strong physical features and a husky voice. I was never able to see the appeal in her, but many did, as she had lots of work modeling, and even a layout in Playboy once. The story just sort of rambles along, trying to develop situations for Yune to extol his corny quips `You must know kung-fu', `Yes, I stepped in some yesterday', finally coming to a rather schmaltzy end where Bruce finally finds the woman his grandfather loved.

Madacy Entertainment presents a rather shoddy full screen picture on this DVD, with plenty of flaws, but not so bad as to be unwatchable. The film has an original runtime of 87 minutes, but here it's listed at 85, suggesting a few scenes are missing. Surprisingly there are chapter stops, and special features include a theatrical trailer for the film and some sneak previews for some cruddy Madacy DVD releases including Shades (1999), Presence of Mind (1999), and Side Streets (1998). Apparently The Call Me Bruce? (1982) did well enough to warrant a sequel five years later titled, aptly enough, They Still Call Me Bruce (1987).

Cookieman108


Rating:
Summary: It's all about the Yune
Review: Johnny Yune plays an affable if somewhat dim witted immigrant who inadvertently gets mixed up with the drug trafficking underworld. To say any more about the plot would be pointless as it only serves as a device to spotlight Yune's silly stand-up humor within several contrived situations.

The acting is bad and the jokes are tired but Yune's character is so likable that you can't help but root for him. He's goofy, innocent, clever and has a heart of gold.

Oddly enough, the DVD has been edited of a couple of "tiny bits" to receive a PG rating that my old Beta tape did not have. The items cut were small and unimportant, but it seems strange as what's left of the film isn't exactly inoffensive. Yes, like many films of it's time, it has plenty of politically incorrect, stereotyping humor. But it's directed at everyone and so ridiculous that it can't be taken seriously.

I like this film probably because I saw it on cable over 15 years ago where it ran over and over again and somehow etched itself into my sub consciousness. I also like it because Yune is genuinely funny and charming. You may like it if you like other tasteless and absurd 70s/80s comedies


Rating:
Summary: True 70's flavored B-movie!
Review: This a true classic. I grew up watching this as a young kid and I love it! Johnny Yune stars as the english accent challenged "Bruce", a goofball of a character that is inexplicably trafficking cocaine for the mafia that he thinks is "special flour". Along the way you'll see more politically incorrect characters, jokes, and slang than you can handle. Dumb cops, amateur "kung-fu", one liners from cheeseville, 70's styled chicks and hilarious stereotypes! If you go into this movie with the mindset that it is a b-movie, I think you could end up enjoying yourself. For the TRUE fans of older Cheesey movies.

Rating:
Summary: True 70's flavored B-movie!
Review: This a true classic. I grew up watching this as a young kid and I love it! Johnny Yune stars as the english accent challenged "Bruce", a goofball of a character that is inexplicably trafficking cocaine for the mafia that he thinks is "special flour". Along the way you'll see more politically incorrect characters, jokes, and slang than you can handle. Dumb cops, amateur "kung-fu", one liners from cheeseville, 70's styled chicks and hilarious stereotypes! If you go into this movie with the mindset that it is a b-movie, I think you could end up enjoying yourself. For the TRUE fans of older Cheesey movies.

Rating:
Summary: damn right they call him bruce
Review: This was the best movie ever, i laughed so hard i cryed and i cryed so hard i laughed. If you hate good movies then stay far away from this masterpeice. why is it so good?? maybe you havent seen a crazy chinese guy eat noodles with nunchucks, but i, oh yes, i have. in closing.... thats all i have to say.

Rating:
Summary: Oh, the Humanity!
Review: Well, it doesn't get any cheesier than this! I should first offer an apology to the world at large concerning my behavior when I first watched this in 1982. You see, I was young then and didn't know much about anything going on in the world at large. To me, "They Call Me Bruce?" was funny, quite possibly the height of humor some twenty years ago. How could you not laugh about an Asian guy coming over to the United States, eventually mistaken for Bruce Lee by a bunch of mafia hoods, and then embarking on a cross-country drug run full of hijinks? I am here to tell you now, in the full flower of my adulthood, that this movie is NOT funny except for an occasional one liner tossed out by lead star Johnny Yune. Rewatching this ultra cheesy, gutter budget turkey absolutely proves the rule that some things enjoyed as a child should never rear their heads again later in life. I cannot believe someone saw fit to release this refuse on DVD.

Don't get me wrong: sometimes cheese-laden movies are a good thing; we all have our favorite low budget groaners. I hope for your sake that one of these favorites is not "They Call Me Bruce?" Starring Korean stand-up comedian Johnny Yune, this fish out of water story attempts to document the antics of Chan, a native Korean (or Chinese?) who works for a bunch of hoods in California. Everyone calls Chan "Bruce," a reference to the late martial arts star Bruce Lee, and even Chan has posters of the legend hanging on the walls of his apartment. Chan is no Bruce Lee, however, as he doesn't even look like the guy and he knows no martial arts whatsoever. This deficiency on the part of our hero doesn't stop the crime boss from tricking Chan into carrying cocaine shipments disguised as flour to drop off points across the country. Since Chan works as a cook for the crime family, he sees nothing wrong with this proposition. The rest of the film outlines one painfully inadequate scene after another as Bruce runs into dangerous thugs, police officers, federal agents following him and his chauffer in order to shut down the crime family, black street hoods, and hillbillies in a country western bar. Throughout it all, Chan continues to follow his dying grandfather's advice to get to New York City where he will find the girl his grandfather loved.

This movie is so dumb that it isn't even laughable 99% of the time. The martial arts scenes are painful to watch, the dialogue is arthritic, and the set pieces (particularly a casino scene in Las Vegas) are so cheap that they look filthy. Then there is the stereotyping that virtually insures a film like this would never get made today. At least "They Call Me Bruce?" indulges in equal opportunity stereotyping. For example, blacks are street hoods who talk "jive," a Jewish mobster talks in a neurotic tone while eating a bagel, the Italian hoods all talk with heavy accents and eat spaghetti, and Asians run martial arts dojos. At one point, a thug makes a cringe worthy reference to Kunta Kinte from "Roots." Even many of the whites in the film appear as dumb hicks straight out of the trailer park.

At least cast member Pamela Huntington, playing federal agent Anita who follows Bruce on his adventures, is quite attractive and nice to watch. Margaux Hemingway appears here as well, playing the weightlifting girlfriend of one of the mafia thugs. Hemingway is not as nice to look at; she looks sweaty and not at all healthy in her role as Karmen. Occasionally Anita and Karmen duke it out in a lame karate fight, but even two girls fighting isn't enough to raise this shipwreck of a film. I don't recall seeing Marsha Warfield in this film even though she appears in the credits, but I'm convinced that the guy who played Porky in that obnoxious series of early '80's films played a bartender in an early scene. None of this matters, though, because the film's lameness taints anyone who appears in it.

As for Yune's jokes, well, here are a few of them. You decide if they are funny: "I was once run over by a Toyota...Oh, what a feeling!" "We were so poor that when a thief broke into our house, we robbed him," and "I once knew a woman who made her husband a millionaire through gambling. Only thing was, he used to be a billionaire." Now certain situations Yune is in when he tosses off a one liner do cause a faint chuckle even today, but this is not brilliant comedy. Rather, it is a mix of weak slapstick, weak one liners, and a corny ending that in no way redeems the previous eighty minutes of gruel shoveled down the viewer's throat.

The DVD transfer is poor, with lots of grain, what looks like slight tearing on the print, and lots of washed out colors. The sound quality is sub par as well, although you can still hear the bad jokes and pathetic overacting easily enough. The only extras on the disc are three film trailers for obscure movies. A director's commentary would have been nice if for no other reason than to hear who bears the responsibility for this atrocity. "They Call Me Bruce?" is a horribly produced, terribly outdated film best relegated to total obscurity. With so many good films still in desperate need of a DVD release, it is deeply troubling pablum like this found its way to store shelves.