Rating: Summary: This was a B Movie. Review: This waste of film would make a great edition of Mystery Science Theater 3000.The plot was contrived and stupid. The best actor/actress in the movie was a monkey (not one of those "talking apes"; a real monkey). There was a truly twisted love triangle between the hero (a remarkably poorly acted textbook Milus Gloriosis [aka "Macho War Guy"]), the herione (a talking monkey, er, ape), and some random girl who really is not very important to the story. Not to say there is a story. The plot is nonsensical and far too convienient. There is none of the intelligence or "thought-provoking-ness" of the first Planet of the Apes...this movie is more of an advertisement of what Hollywood can do with make-up. I was also very insulted by the potrayel of Lincon as a monkey. That was bad.
Rating: Summary: Tim Burton's remake of Planet of the Apes is garbage. Review: Terrible. Simply terrible. Whatever you do, do not buy this movie in any form, save a video rental or ppv purchase. The best part of the movie is the first 5 minutes... because at that point the movie still has promise, but then its all downhill. I like to think Charlton Heston died halfway through this movie because it was so bad. For those who have seen the 1968 version, the Tim Burton remake, reimagining, or rewhatever... is not even 1% close to the original as far as quality, acting, plot development, or even effects. There is nothing good I can say about this movie, as hard as I try. The male ape makeup is close to what was seen in the original, while the female ape makeup is bad, bad, baad. The whole movie plays as if it takes place in 2 or 3 sets, with the Ape town looking like an Ape version of Whoville. The inconsistencies and illogicalities are numerous beyond mention. The ending is also totally nonsensical, and lacks the dramatic impact of the 1968 version. All in all, steer clear of purchasing this turkey.
Rating: Summary: Watch the original instead Review: I had convinced myself that Tim Burton's Planet of the Apes was a pretty good movie after viewing it last summer in the theaters. However, upon watching the DVD, I have to say that I wanted to like it so much that I must have clouded my vision a bit. The effects and make-up artistry are far superior to those of the original film, but none of the shock value, suspense or even character development from the original film are here. Maybe it's not fair to compare Burton's POTS with the original Charlton Heston-helmed film. The original, as dated as it is today, still holds up very well. Burton's version, however, doesn't try hard enough to duplicate the elements that made the original film successful and then when he DOES try to emulate the original film (as he does in the film's final scene), he fails completely. The DVD has several bonus features that might justify the price of admission if you like film documentaries. A lot of stuff on how the effects were done and the ability to go through the whole movie, simultaneously showing you how the various effects were done. Unfortunately, my copy had a glitch where it showed you some of these "mini-documentaries" even if you DON'T have the DVD set to show them. (I returned my copy.) The film is not entirely without charm. Helena Bonham Carter's Ari is an intriguing character who puts a new spin on animal rights. Tim Roth absolutely seethes evil as Thade, the ape general. He overacts to the 9th degree, but it works for this role. The appearance and power of the apes is much more appropriately shown in this film than in the original, but that's probably just a reflection of how far movie technology has come. Even with all the fantastic effects, however, Burton's POTS doesn't hold a candle to the original.
Rating: Summary: Wow Review: This critics tore this movie apart. Why remake a classic? Well, watch the movie and you'll see. This movie was brought to date with style and maintained the integrity of the original. The action was cool and the plot was even cooler. I loved the way the movie came together. Nothing will prepare you for the end though.
Rating: Summary: Can Someone Explain The Ending To Me????? Review: The movie's makeup and special effects were very well done and the majority of the story is very entertaining. The ending is completely incomprehensible! Anyone who's considering this movie knows that the following occurs so I don't think I'm spoiling it for you; a person time travels into the future, encounters a world dominated by apes and attempts to return to his own time. The chronology of time travel and how his world changes make no logical sense to me. Can anyone explain how you go forward in time and change something which then results in changes in the past? Our whole family watched it and no one can figgure out the ending!
Rating: Summary: 2 hours of my life I'll never get back. Review: This is not a remake of the amazing 1968 "Planet of the Apes" but a tedious, boring and vapid new story. We even fast forwarded past the fight scene at the end it was so plodding. Mark Wahlburg mumbles his lines and the others are just not that great. Forget the special effects, I've seen better. I recommend the original.
Rating: Summary: get your ... dirty hands off this tape Review: Okay, maybe I am being a little rough. The ending stunk up the screen, though. Thankfully, the wonderful producers have given us 13 hours of dvd stuff, so thirteen hours of garbage are better then 2. Right? Right? Also, I did not like the shift from civil rights to animal rights. The first was a morality play regarding the races, and this one seemed to shy away from it, as if that understanding and acceptance between races has been achieved, and now we just need to set our sighs on another subject. Wrong. Oh well, if you like watching monkeys jump around, and watching the body double for Michael Jackson (helen Bonham Carter) talk, then it will be a good movie for you. Still, give me Roddie McDowell!
Rating: Summary: hugely disappointing Review: This film was quite possibly the worst film i have seen this year. I normally love tim burtons films but it just shows blockbusters isn't really his strong point. The cast for start was badly ensembled. Walberg was far too wooden, tim roth was just plain annoying and carter put on the worst ape impression i have ever seen. On the dvd, there is about 13hrs of extras but i havent even watched 1 minute of these due to the fact that the film was so bad. Stay away from this film.
Rating: Summary: REMAKE OR RE-IMAGINED? Review: Since Tim Burton arrived on the movie scene with Pee-wee's Big Adventure, Beetlejuice and Edward Scissorhands, as a film-maker he has often been described as inconsistent and his remake of Planet Of The Apes has taken some flak. Personally, I loved Batman Returns and Ed Wood but was very disappointed with Batman. Despite the critical mauling, I also think Mars Attacks is a fabulous black comedy, although Sleepy Hollow was in my view (although sumptuous in appearance) relatively average by the great auteur's high standards. So what of his "re-imagining" of Planet Of The Apes? Seeking his chimpanzee and contrary to his superior's orders, astronaut Leo Davidson (Mark Wahlberg) travels through a wormhole in space and crash lands on a planet populated by both apes and humans but where the apes rule and the enslaved humans are treated as filthy animals. Soon captured, Leo quickly comes to the attention of the evil General Thade (an excellent Tim Roth), who instantly recognizes Leo as a threat to ape kind and sets out to destroy him. However, Leo, accompanied by two fellow human slaves (Kris Kristofferson and the voluptuous Estella Warren) and aided by the peace-loving primate Ari (Helena Bonham Carter) they flee the ape city, hotly pursued by General Thade and his ape army. The special effects and make up are absolutely top-notch and no effort has been spared in attention to detail. The script is more than passable and has more than the odd nudge and a wink at both the original movie and an ironic view of our own modern society, the way that we treat animals and each other. Interestingly however, unlike the original perhaps, it is the actors behind the fur that excel in this movie. Helenah Bonham Carter (Fight Club) is once again successfully cast against type as a possible love interest and Charlton Heston gives a nice cameo performance, whilst Tim Roth revels in the opportunity of playing a ruthlessly ambitious, evil and murderous primate. Meanwhile of the humans, Mark Wahlberg (a surprising choice for this role) perhaps could have been more charismatic and Estelle Warren just has to look pretty and occasionally pout, although they all give passable performances. The film perhaps lulls in places but overall it does maintain its hold on its audience and although the ending has been the subject of much debate and negative comment, personally I liked it, didn't think it was that ambiguous and feel it sets us up nicely for a sequel. Remaking such a famous and much-loved movie was always likely to divide opinion. I like many adored the original (but despised the dross that was the sequels) and my expectations for this movie were very high. That is a lot of baggage for a movie to start out with but although not completely satisfied, I like most audiences (I believe) very much enjoyed this movie! And though it may not go down as one of Hollywood's classics, unlike it's predecessor, Tim Burton has for the most part succeeded in re-inventing a franchise that will entertain for many years to come. Whats more, this DVD is absolutely packed with top-notch extras, making it a very desireable DVD to own.
Rating: Summary: Rediculous! Review: The trailer for this film was excellent, thats why I wanted to see it. it looked intense, exciting, and even scary. Was it any of these things? NO! It actually started off very promising when Marc Wahlburg crashes down on the Planet of the Apes, and he and a bunch of natives are running from the apes. After that it goes down hill. It's all about Mark Wahlburg trying to get free from the planet. The Apes are rediculous. The make up is excellent and you can barely recognize Helena Bonham Carter, Tim Roth, and Michael Clarke Duncan, but I couldn;t help but laugh at these fine actors as they said their horrendoues dialogue, and believe me the dialogue was not meant to be funny. It lacked any excitment or intensity and was filled with bad performances especially from Mark Wahlburg and Estella Warren.
|