Rating: 
Summary: Decent movie; avalance of DVD extras
Review: This is a decent remake of Planet of the Apes, but as you might expect, it's not as good as the original. Many of the characters are vague and you really don't learn much about them. The slave humans in this picture are more intelligent than in the original, which I disliked. The special effects and makeup are top-notch. Finally, this DVD has an avalanche of bonus features. A huge amount. It will take you hours to watch them all.
Rating: 
Summary: BURTON serves up a nice looking DUD!
Review: Planet of the Apes is visually alluring, but not cinematically fulfilling. Burton presents a world that is overwhelmingly dark, both in tone (humans are slaves, the apes their masters) and color (the jungles are dark, the villages are dark, even the apes are dark). In a summer action flick like this, where you expect it to be fun and enjoyable, heavy themes are most effective when they're subtle. But POTA just whacks you on the head with the prejudice theme and continues to do so for the better part of the two hour film. It rarely cracks a joke and passes on the numerous opportunities to poke fun at itself and the POTA franchise. Instead, Burton spends the first two thirds of the film establishing how humans are treated like animals. It is, of course, supposed to be ironic and reflective of the way humans treat animals. But talk about overdoing it! Just to be sure you get it, there is a sequence where a young ape chooses a young girl to be her pet (sheesh!).Now, I welcome dark and edgy themes as much as the next brooding film buff, especially from a filmmaker like Burton. But the visuals take such priority in POTA that the rest of the film suffers as a result. The storyline is barely existent. The characters are dull and one-dimensional. And the ending - not the cliffhanger ending (more on that later) but the climactic-battle ending - is a total sell out. C'mon, a "savior" drops in from the sky and suddenly the apes see the error of their ways??? Deus ex machina, anyone? Burton has shown himself to be a great filmmaker and an even better storyteller. We watch his films to be thrilled and excited and scared by his exotic worlds and his wild and wonderful characters. Don't expect any of that here. There is ONE thing I liked about the story: the origin of the apes. Nothing too original or amazing, but I was pleasantly surprised. The rest is horrible. Especially, the surprise "let's-leave-you-hanging-cause-there's-going-to-be-a-sequel" ending, which I assume is supposed to "blow your mind." "Re-imagining" indeed. Except it has no imagination.
Rating: 
Summary: Horrible, horrible, horrible!
Review: Big on special effects and computer enhancement, small on character development and making me care about what happens to these asinine loonies. Mark Wahlberg can go back to doing Calvin Klein ads, and HBC needs to get back to the costume dramas she is so excellent in. As for story, what story? There was supposed to be a story? And that "surprise" ending could be seen a light-year away. Burton, stick to "Nightmare Before Christmas" and keep your damn paws off any future sequels.
Rating:
Summary: Planet of the Apes?
Review: Tim Burton's "re-imagining" of the classic 1968 original is big on spectacle but short on story. Starting out like traditional sci fi film (albeit with Mark Wahlberg- what's he doing here?), Planet of the Apes is a very different plot from the first one, and one with lots of spectacle and action, but not so much substance. The plot of the film is very action-orientated and made me want for more background story. Sure, the action set pieces are great, but to have more on how the rouge humans came to the planet ruled by apes would have been appreciated. But like many action films recently the action and SFX make up for the usual lack of a meaty story (or script for that matter). However, Burton's visionary flair does not disappoint, in that sense the film is fantastic, as is Tim Roth as General Thade, leader of the army of apes, and the imposing Michael Clarke Duncan as one of the commanders of the army. The only stink of this movie actually, is the aforementioned Mark Wahlberg, who threatens to redefine the term "wooden". After some huge battle scenes we go to the legendary ending, which understandably confused viewers. Where the original's ending was great, this one is a real thinker, and when it was released, opinions of its climax flew over the net as fast as naked Brittneys. The DVD is great though, and makes for some awesome entertainment with great visuals. If only they had spent as much money on getting the story right as they had on the special effects and this would be a great movie, instead of just a good one.
Rating:
Summary: Boring Monkeys
Review: Enormously Dissapointing. It had great potential, but never happened. Dull!
Rating: 
Summary: An Incredible DVD
Review: This is an awesome DVD. There are so MANY choices of special effects. Plus this is a great movie with very good acting and makeup. Unfortunatly it did not win an Oscar. Well worth seeing and buying just for the hours of special features. Great movie worth the small cost.
Rating:
Summary: One of the WORST I have ever had the Discomfort of Seeing
Review: I love Tim Burton movies. I have been a ravenous fan of his since the first of the Batman movies (as we know them today) came out in 1989 (there is another movie made in the 60s based of the classic TV show, starring the one true Batman, Adam West). Furthermore, I loved the original Planet of the Apes. It was one of the most well known, recognizable, and thought provoking movies of all time, with one of the greatest twists in cinematic history. Not only that, but if you look at the series of "Apes" movies, as a whole, you will most likely find that they are one of the greatest, most well fitting together with respect to continuity (if that is even possible to say) franchises ever. So with that being said, could this movie possibly go wrong? Oh it did. It went WAY wrong. This movie is righteous garbage. The twist at the end (not a spoiler) makes absolutely no logical sense, independently. But if it sets up a plot that will be explained in the sequel, then I don't want to know, and have no desire to see it. But what is my major grievance with this movie: Marky Mark. In this movie, he single handedly gives a horrible performance, AS ALWAYS, and disgraces the name of models gone actors, which if you think about it is pretty bad considering they have a bad reputation to begin with. One of the more subtle problems that I have with him, besides his pitiful excuse for acting, is that throughout this and seemingly all of his other movies he has the same facial expression, which is something of a mix between constipation and just got done running a marathon. Even moreso is the fact that throughout the whole movie, he never seems to be surprised at the fact that not only is he in a world completely different than his, nor the fact that it is primarily populated by gigantic, walking, talking apes, nor does he ever seem to ponder, even ask, or want to find out, "hey, what in the righteous heck is going on here?" Here is my breakdown of the other key players in the movie: Helena Bonham Carter - brilliant actress - waste of her talent. Charlton Heston - cultural icon - waste of his talent. Tim Burton - one of the greatest and most imaginative, and visually impressive moviemakers of all time - completely shot himself in the foot for making this garbage. Anyone else remotely involved in the making of this movie - waste of their collective talent. The only redeeming factors of this movie is that Danny Elfman once again provides a good score to the movie and the shot where they look back upon the city (it's the only shot in the movie that is signature Tim Burton). Now I have seen some BAD movies in my day, and not only does this one take the taco, but to categorize it as only a bad movie would be an insult. This is beyond a bad movie. This is a complete waste of your life if you watch it. Please, please, please if you want to see Planet of the Apes, look past the fancy special effects, good makeup and prosthetics job, and the fact that it is a newer movie, and go watch the lower budget, older original. Save yourself the agony.
Rating:
Summary: Exciting film
Review: The costumes and makeup in this film are incredible, and make the story so believable. The ending of the film starts to become a little boring, but ends well, and will leave you wanting to see the sequel that promises to follow. The apes seems very real, not cheesy at all. The movie is very suspenseful, leaving you to imagine what it would be like if we were really controlled by a planet of apes.
Rating:
Summary: A Great Movie with an Interesting Twist
Review: This was a very well done movie. It keeps the viewers interest for almost the entire time. The costumes and makeup were flawlessly done, and they really make you feel like the actors are actually apes. The effects in this movie are well done, especially the time travel sequences and the crash sequence. The ending leaves one thinking about exactly what happened and the card that explains the time travel (included with the DVD) helps the understanding greatly. Overall this is an awesome movie with some incredible special features.
Rating:
Summary: worst movie of the millenium
Review: This is the worst movie I've seen in a very very long time. Both the plot and the acting are very shallow. Marky Mark cannot act, and his acting is so bad as to be distracting. Estella Warren is barely in the movie, only a superficial role, really. The movie is nothing like the original.
At first I thought it was pretty cool to see a cameo of Charlton Heston as an ape, until I realized he was just using the role to spew his NRA philosophy that guns are what make us the greatest. So, what if you forget the plot and the acting, what about action? The action plain and simple stinks as well. Two of the head apes fight each other for what I thought would be a good fight scene, and poof it's over. Boring. The two endings are just ridiculous, especially the last one. I would pay people not to see this movie and any sequels, for their own good. This movie gives a bad name to scifi, Hollywood, and the original planet of the apes.
|
