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Conan the Destroyer

Conan the Destroyer

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Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Crum!! What a Let down..
Review: Connan the Destroyer was an ok movie but it lacked the power that the first movie had. It doesn't even live up to the name Connan. I am a fan (the only reason for the three stars)of Connan and have this film but I very seldom watch it. If you want a great film purchase the first Connan or if you're a fan of Connan purchase this one. I warn you, however, be prepared for a major let down.

In this film Connan makes some new friends and a ton of enemies. In this films adventure, Connan saves the life of a beautiful girl, Destroys towing emenies, and is offered a throne but doesn't take it. He is Connan and He is destined to be a King by his own hand. It has a good story line but could have all in all been a better film

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Hail Conan, the Destroyer!
Review: The Hyborian Age, when shinning kingdoms lay spread across the world like blue mantles beneath the stars and powerful sorcerors cast mighty spells, and a man lived by his sword. And on to this, Conan, destined to bare the jeweled crown of Aquilonia upon a troubled brow, and who had recently made motion picture history with his previous success "Conan the Destroyer", was hired by director Richard Fleischer, and cast along with Grace Jones, Wilt Chamberlain, and Mako. Hence this rousing fantasy-adventure, with wizards, princesses, and warriors a plenty! Yes, that's right, folks, that sword-wielding, Crom-worshipping Cimmerian is back, and this time, he's on a quest to help a princess retrieve a magical horn (don't worry, it's better than it sounds). Although this is definitely not as good as it's successer, this is still one good movie that will keep you entertained. It does get corny at times, and the acting does get a bit sloppy. But I still stick to my review. Basil Pouledouris does it again, with another great musical score. They should make another sequal, that shows how Conan becomes king of Aquilonia. But that is another story!

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: This is horrible
Review: Think of the worst, most contrived, corniest, silliest, lamest movie you've ever seen....multiply that by ten, and then present it as a sequel to a great fantasy epic...and you have Conan the Destroyer.

I mean, this is the worst of the worst. The "comic" elements in this film make you wince, the plot is simplistic and boring, the performances may as well have been acted by over-eager 12 year-olds, and the characters...don't even get me started on them. Okay, do get me started on them.

They're ridiculous, and "camp" is almost too dignified a word for them. Aside from Conan (who I may like ONLY because of the first movie) there is not a single character in this movie that you will care about, period. The group assembled here is pure garbage. And the actors who play them? Likewise. Wilt Chamberlain? WILT CHAMBERLAIN? Also, you'll hope you NEVER EVER EVER hear the name "Tracey Walters" after this movie is over. He plays Malik, the worst sidekick in movie history.

The only reason you should even contemplate renting, buying, or watching this tripe is if you have a macabre sense of fatality and want to set yourself up for a severe disappointment...or if you are a hopeless completist, like me. A classic like Conan the Barbarian either deserved a better sequel, or no sequel at all. This broke my heart when I saw it.

Thumbs down...way, way down.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Arnold's first experience
Review: Conan the Barbarian is back in CONAN THE DESTROYER, 1984 sequel. Without going into a long review, if you liked the first one, rent this one- but chances are you won't be pleased. CONAN THE DESTROYER (1984) Rated: PG (Fantasy Barbarian Violence) 2 1/2 stars out of 5.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Conan Your Friendly Neighbourhood Barbarian
Review: The plot: Conan is hired by a Queen Taramis (Sarah Douglas) to escort her young charge, Princess Jehnna (D'Abo) on a treasure-hunting expedition. Only the Princess can touch the treasure sought by Taramis, but because Taramis doesn't trust Conan with either the treasure or Jehnna's virginity, she sends along the captain of her guards (Chamberlain) with instructions to kill Conan as soon as the mission is accomplished. Afterwards, Taramis plans to sacrifice both the virginal Jehnna and the treasure to resurrect an ancient demon. You can guess the rest.... Unlike the muscle, blood, sex, death and doom of the first film (and Robert E. Howard's sex and violence pulp novels,) this one resembles a quaint gathering from one of the numerous J.R.R. Tolkein rip-offs. It's rated PG-13, has bright and colorful costumes, and while there's swordfighting, there's almost no blood.

I mean, even taken for what it is, there's plenty to dislike in this sequel. Like, well, the cast -- Ugh!! The inept Olivia D'Abo clashes atonally with her supposedly ancient surroundings, Tracey Walter, and Conan the Barbarian holdover Mako are painfully unfunny funny sidekicks, and the very IDEA of Grace Jones is pathetically dated. The clumsy performances, however, are Oscar-worthy compared to the comically cheesy special effects. One of Conan's demonic opponents turns out to be a guy in a monkey suit-in fact, not even a whole suit, but only a rubber Halloween mask. Oooh, scary! And the scene where Jehnna is spirited away by a huge bird made of mist? I've seen better animation in Land of the Lost. As for Richard Fleischer's direction, it can only be described as 'disinterested' -- the complete opposite of Milius' vigorous, engaged style.

What an aweful way for Robert E. Howard's mighty warrior to end....

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Easily one of my favorite movies ever
Review: Conan the Destroyer is probally one of my favorite movies of all time. I really like Conan the Barbarian as well but I think this one is better. To me the story is really good, right from the beginning. The best part of the story I think is where they go to the castle that is set in the middle of the lake, and Conan fights the wizard.

The music is great, and to me, the music on it is better than the music from the first one, even though they are both quite similar.

Arnold did a great job once again portraying the barbarian, Conan. Besides Conan, another character I thought is good, was Malik. I don't know he is just cool. Bombaata is another good character. Wilt Chamberlain did a good job playing this giant warrior.

I don't have any complaints about this movie. I have liked it a lot ever since I first watched it(about 12 years ago). This movie is not for everyone though. Some like it, some don't. Some think Conan the Barbarian is better.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: average movie with a great star
Review: This is one of those films that i bought just for arnold. The original conan movie was a brilliant combination of production design, music, metaphores and iconic direction and cinematography. This sequel is dumb and has nothing of interest in the plot. The revised musical score is an insult to the original and even Mako's voiceover sounds very laboured and bored compared to in the first film. Plus Richard Fleicher is a poor director. But Arnold looks fabulous as ever and there is some good action in it. Worth getting if your a schwarzenegger fan. I just wish John Milius could have directed it. Oh well.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: laughing at previous review..
Review: Wilt Chamberlain isn't that good of an actor.. Grace Jones wasn't all *that* good.. And the reference to Xena? PLEASE.. you know, that's more of an insult to Grace than it is a compliment to this movie..

This movie was an overall bad production. Get "Conan the Barbarian" and be happy, and never touch this one. I can see how this could appeal to a Xena watcher, but I really would have expected better after seeing Conan the Barbarian and reading tons of the Conan and other Robert Jordan books. To sum up, this is a PG rated movie. Conan is not a PG-man. Try taking Rambo and remaking it as a PG movie with funny characters involved.. you get the point. cheers.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Arny and Grace Jones were great!
Review: This is not carry the same amount of blood taste that the other Conan stories delivered. This one is more of an adventure. A quest that Conan takes, in the hope of getting back his love, Valeria. Grace Jones was excellent as Zula ( Xena on the dark side) Wilt Chamberlain, another good performer. And of course, we "love" watching Arnold Schwarzenegger as Conan.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Possibly the worst film ever.
Review: This sequel to 'Conan the Barbarian' is just plain bad. The original movie was excellent, but this second one is worst than horrible. Here are some of the worst parts : Grace Jones screaming about everywhere as usual, and the weird dude wearing a fake gorilla mask. Even a kid in a Halloween mask looks scarier and more real!


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