Rating: 
Summary: A Surrealistic Nightmare
Review: Michael Bay is the director who singlehandedly (with "The Rock") turned me off to mainstream movies. I used to be the target audience for this garbage, but something about his crass, sleazy, vapid "style" just got to me. Then I had the misfortune of being snowed in with this "movie" on tv. All I can say is, any film that plays the line "This is turning into a surrealistic nightmare!" seriously has got to be shredded lest it be unearthed centuries from now. And everyone (except Liv Tyler and Steve Buscemi) associated with this vomit should be gently put to sleep.
Rating: 
Summary: Saving the World from Extinction
Review: This 1998 film shows the threat to the earth from an asteroid. It opens with small meteors hitting Manhattan and causing damage. (Who can watch this after 9/11 without shuddering?) NASA tracks this back to a Texas-sized asteroid that will hit Earth in 18 days, and Extinction Level Event. A side plot introduces us to an oil-drilling platform in South Asia, with their personality conflicts. The owner is the most experienced oil driller; he is summoned to solve the problem: drill a hole in the asteroid to blast it into relatively harmless pieces. There is no excuse for failure.The middle part is padded with the training for these volunteers. This explains the plans to the viewer. There is one interpersonal relationship problem. The crew is given time off to visit their kin, and develop their characters. Another asteroid hits Shanghai; now (?) the world knows of the peril. The special NASA crew leaves on their mission. They dock at the Russian space station to fuel up (unleaded?). A fuel leak causes a fire; they escape just in time. One spaceship runs into an asteroid and goes off the grid. The other overshoots the landing spot, and lands where it is hard to drill. They fall behind schedule. NASA now considers whether to remotely detonate the bomb. The film questions the judgment of Official Authority. The special effects of this film is better than 'Star Wars'. There is a blow-out on the drill; the attempt has failed! But the other drilling rig shows up just in time, and completes the job. The remote detonator has a problem; someone must stay and set it off. Harry Stamper volunteers to save the world. The space ship takes off, the bomb explodes the asteroid. This is an entertaining film in spite of the many, many cliches. This story recalls "Ragnarok" by Ignatius Donnelly, which analyzed the common legends of mankind and explained them as the remembrance of a comet hitting the earth and causing great climatic changes.
Rating:
Summary: Good or Bad? You Decide.
Review: In the mid-to-late nineties, the millennium and the theory of Y2K had a tremendous impact on popular culture, and seemed to bring a continuing fascination with the destruction of the world in cinema. Twister, Volcano, and Dante's Peak all proved that disaster can be turned into box office success, but as the decade continued, Hollywood decided to tackle the biggest subject of all: the end of the world. Such epics as Independence Day, Deep Impact and of course Armageddon represented this movement. The latter was the biggest and best of the three and both obliterates and greatly, greatly strengthens all the stereotypes of the genre. Unlike Deep Impact, which was basically two hours of self-pity in the face of certain death, and unlike Independence Day, which was littered with horrible acting, Armageddon at least gets the cast right, and luckily, despite what sappy or cheesy plot lines it may have, the acting is passable for an action flick. Bruce Willis is typically puffed-up but believable, and so are Ben Affleck, Liv Tyler, Billy Bob Thornton, Steve Buscemi and Owen Wilson. Armageddon cost over a hundred million dollars to make, earned even more, and was seen by countless numbers of people, so obviously it is not an everyday movie. It's a BIG movie.
First, the good stuff. It's an excellently-produced science fiction/action/adventure movie. The special effects are top-notch and truly breathtaking. At a 140 million dollar budget, an all-star cast, and an almost three-hour length, this is truly a BIG movie. This is the same kind of overwhelming, big budget action that gave birth to the Matrix series. Like the Matrix, it's action-packed, loud, breathtaking, and out of this world. But unlike the Matrix, which lived up and surpassed the expectations of viewers, the design of Armageddon often tries to stand up too high and falls flat on its face. This can make the whole idea of this movie seem overblown and pretentious. But with a movie as BIG as this, can plot matter much? Maybe. It depends on the viewer. The best thing about Armageddon is that it expresses the true nature of humanity and the natural instinct of self-preservation and survival of the species by all means necessary. But of course, the absolute worst thing about Armageddon should be obvious to anyone who watched it: the plot. It is like the classic action movie situation that even though your brain might be screaming with the far-out premise of the plot, your heart is racing and adrenaline is pumping so you're not listening, but with a twist. Because Armageddon is not just a shoot-em-up, kill em all; show no mercy revenge type of story. It's a story about the end of the world. This film is filled with more over-the-top action, suspense and impending disaster than perhaps any other film in history, and Michael Bay and Jerry Bruckheimer both deserve credit for being able to pull the budget and resources together for such a project. But with so much effort put into special effects and action, couldn't they have invested more in research of other countries, minorities, and women? Like the Amazon review says, it seems that if it is not white, American and male, they simplify and stereotype it. The story is basically:
A huge asteroid the size of Texas is hurtling towards the Earth and if it impacts will wipe out every living thing on the planet, not even bacteria will survive. NASA decides to send a shuttle onto the asteroid itself and plant a nuclear device inside. Since a highly trained team of astronauts apparently don't know how to drill a hole in a rock, NASA instead is convinced to let a oil rig crew learn a crash course in being astronauts. Bruce Willis leads the crew along with Ben Affleck, who is dating Bruce's daughter played by Liv Tyler. The crew land on the asteroid, where they encounter disasters galore. Sadly, predictability abounds in the story, and there are plenty of scenes to make viewers groan. The blatant flag-waving patriotism and oversexed machismo of the characters is laughable, Aerosmith's music gets so much play on the soundtrack at times it feels like a music video, and the scenes depicting other countries are stereotypical to the extreme. The theme of Armageddon is sadly similar to Independence Day in that Americans, American values and American technology save the world. That is enough to make any leftist instantly loathe a movie like Armageddon. The hyperkinetic edits during the action sequences are a statement on how low Hollywood is willing to stoop to entertain the nanosecond-long attention spans of the younger generations. Seriously, can't you stop on one thing for more than three seconds? The movie does have its humorous moments, most of them brought on by Steve Buscemi and Owen Wilson, but the "tragic" ending sequences might make you want to weep crocodile tears...or groan in disgust. Ultimately, this movie depends on the person, but as for myself, I'm glad that I didn't pay my seven bucks to first have my eyes dazzled with special effect and Liv Tyler's beauty and then have my brain numbed by the action and then finally have my heart ripped out of my chest by the unnecessarily long and sappy "emotional" ending.
Rating:
Summary: Bad story, bad acting, great SFX!
Review: Terrific special effects cannot possibly hope to buoy this dung heap of a movie. Unlike the similarly-plotted "Deep Impact", "Armageddon" is a shallow, explosives-laden snoozer, featuring too many stars speaking too much cheesey dialogue through too many painfully-scored and acted scenes. I'm not sure what I disliked more, the music video pacing or the ludicrously rubber "science" behind this piece of science fiction. Really, don't bother with this one, unless you plan to turn the sound off and enjoy the movie purely on its visual merits. In that department it is a home run. Otherwise, skip it, and go get a copy of "Deep Impact". Now there is a truly outstanding asteroid disaster movie.
Rating:
Summary: Cheesiest film ever
Review: This has got to be one of the corniest and sappiest movies I've ever seen. Even if you don't mind the extreme camp value of it, the scenes of young children running around dressed as astronauts and playing with space shuttles was too much. the film is filled with factual errors and flaws that look as if the producers just didn't even care. Isn't everyone aware of the line "in space no one can hear you scream." So how come we hear it in this movie? The ONLY way you will be able to enjoy this film is if you suspend your belief in science (and reality for that matter), and just enjoy it for the action-filled special effects-laden popcorn movie it is. This is not a movie that will win any awards or critical acclaim, but it is somewhat entertaining.
I have to say that while definately not the worst movie ever made, it certainly is one of the most ridiculous. That being said, this makes for a very poor DVD. I don't know if they were planning on releasing a "Special-Edition" DVD in the future, but this one is just devoid of all special features. A music video and a trailer. That's IT. And for a Michael Bay film with a 100+ million dollar budget, that is unaceptable. At the very least, throw in a small special effects featurette.
Rating: 
Summary: One of the best movies in the last decade
Review: Bruce Willis soars leap years above his stereotypical action hero image and delivers a blockbuster performance. This move kept me on the edge of my seat from the opening scene! Any father with a daughter who can watch his final scene without getting caught up in it is emotionally dead. If you haven't seen it, just buy it!
Rating: 
Summary: Another Oscar-Worthy Contribution From Michael Bay
Review: Normally, the "Criterion Collection" is reserved for only the very best and most brilliant films but their additions of the Michael Bay blockbusters, "The Rock" and this, a big loud apocalyptic joy ride would indicate that even they need to make ends meet. I label Michael Bay films as a "guilty pleasure". They are often big, dumb, and loud movies with predictable crowd-pleasing endings and plot holes big enough to hold "an asteriod the size of Texas". Anyways if you too are a fan of these movies then you will no doubt want to add this to your collection. "Armageddon" is everyone's favorite disaster flick gone wild with a romantic subplot tacked on to please everyone. It seems that after a violent meteor shower destroys major sections of New York that high-level NASA officials have discovered that the worst is yet to come. We've got a giant asteroid (described as a "global killer") on its way here and it's up to the world's greatest deep-core driller (played by who else but Bruce Willis) to stop it. NASA seems to have pinpointed down to the last second how much exact time we have before it hits us but only Willis the hillbilly driller knows how to truly stop it. After an hour of training mission montages, Willis and his group of slack-jawed sidekicks are off to do battle with the asteroid. Along the way, they lose about half of the crew and pick up a very annoying Russian astronaut. They end up landing a few miles outside of their planned destination and trouble ensues. The boys back home don't seem to have too much confidence in our heroes and want to remote detonate and call it a day. Bruce isn't having it though as he takes control of the mission and declares to anyone listening that he "promised his girl he was coming home". It seems that the satellite hook-up only works when Bruce has a cheesy overwritten line to perform. If you're a fan of movies that boast action and special effects over any type of sensical plot then this is your movie. This particular DVD features "The Director's Cut" of the movie with alternate scenes. There are some scenes that have been omitted to make way for the new stuff but hey, you can't win them all. Lawrence Tierney shows up as Bruce's dad in this new version and gives him a cheesy speech about the joys of parenthood for him to use in the "alternate version" of his goodbye speech to Liv Tyler. The movie also comes with a hilarious "gag reel" and equally-entertaining audio commentaries. Well, the actor one is good but there is one with a bunch of real-life NASA folks that just goes on and on. If you enjoyed "Armageddon" as much as I did then you'll probably want to own this double-disc collector's edition. If not, it's only a matter of time before the good people at Criterion decide to give "Con-Air" it's just due.
Rating:
Summary: An action film, but for that genre, a good flick
Review: Yes, the plot is far-fetched and hardly belieable... but isn't that the purpose of an action film??? You have to suspend reality to watch them. You must buy into the premise of the movie. If you can't, then don't bother. Good performances here Billy Bob, Bruce, Ben, Liv... nicely done.
Rating:
Summary: Shamefully Bad
Review: This movie epitomizes Hollywood's love affair with fluff over substance. This whole film is so glossy, so formulaic, and so utterly empty that it's really quite extraordinary in its vapidity. The marketing tie-in with Aerosmith smacks of additional cynical money-grubbing. The visual style in particular is laughable and shameful: one second, it looks like an MTV video, the next a car commercial. Avoid if you want to respect yourself in the morning.
Rating:
Summary: THE WORST FILM EVER MADE !
Review: When I saw this movie in the theater, I liked about the first 5 minutes, then I just remember wanting this retarded movie to end. It just kept going...and going....and going. It just got more absurd as the hours past. Terribal script, lame acting, dorky soundtrack. Especially that god awfull song by Areosmith. Sitting there in my seat after two and a half agonizing hours, I only could hope for a real asteroid to hit the earth to end this movie disaster. Do yourself a favor and buy a different dvd.
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