I Wish I Never Met You : Dating the Shiftless, Stupid, and Ugly: A Novel

Rating:
Summary: Hilarious
Review: Despite a couple of scenes being over-the-top, there are belly-laughs galore in this book. Every woman has dated at least one of these guys--and hopefully can laugh about it now.

Rating:
Summary: Alright...
Review: Everybody lost their minds over "Tip Drill" with the credit card scene, but they should be more offended this book. The whole book is full of stories with a woman going to the absolute extreme every time a man didn't act the way she wanted him to. The narrator was a golddigger, greedy, violent, vindictive and reminded me why men think women are so doggone crazy! The stories at the beginning were humorous (one story actually did happen to me, with the dude from the club who she bought the Bubblegum for--except mine was a WuTang t-shirt) but the ones at the end disgusted me. Burning down houses and urinating on people just isn't funny to me.

Rating:
Summary: Great Book!
Review: I was browsing at the bookstore and picked up this book. It turned out to be a nice read. I thought it was very funny and the different situations were hilarious! I think if someone is looking to laugh this book is worth their time.

Rating:
Summary: This was hilarious!
Review: I Wish I Never Met You
Denise N. Wheatley 3 1/2 stars

This comical collection of dating mishaps is hilarious!
The narrator, no name given takes you through her dating dilemma's with Doug the Heinous Dragon, Preston the Project Mishap, Ernest the Uncover Sugar Booty, Warren the so called Wonder..ect..
At the end of each dating story she gives you tips labled Bottom Damn Line:
on how to avoid the same disaster.
We've all had a few dating dilemma's but this sisters stories are wild. Yours won't hold a candle to these. In her quest to find Mr. Right she definitely meets some jokers.
My Bottom damn Line:
This books was Bananas! straight up, no sugar coating. This nameless narrator was oustrageously funny. I enjoyed her mishaps. Glad they aren't mine.
reviewed by
Dawn



Rating:
Summary: The Bottom Line
Review: Look for it, and you'll find it. The bottom line, the lesson to be learned, the moral of the story is visible for all who dare to look. No matter what we go through in life, the bottom line is there for us to recognize it and the simple way it keeps us grounded (if we pay attention). In I WISH I NEVER MET YOU, author Denise N. Wheatley shares with us quite a few bottom lines from one woman's crazy dating life. Through all the drama, the burning down of apartments, the fights, the loving, and the laughter, the narrator identifies the hardcore reality of every one of her stories and unabashedly shares that with her audience.

Aside from good morals, the narrator also shares with us some of the most hilarious, shocking, shameless, and disappointing dating stories that I have ever read or heard. While I must admit that a few of the tales hit home for me, I'm very glad that my dating life isn't as bad as this woman's. Whew! Sure, most of us have dated liars, cheaters, and/or abusers, but the men in this book take the cake. So does our fearless narrator. The main character from whose perspective author Wheatley writes is a force to be reckoned with. She dropkicked one man on the dance floor, burned down another's apartment, and peppered sprayed another one in the club - all for very valid reasons, of course. She's had to deal with married men, men who couldn't decide what team they were batting for, men with money, men who acted like they had money, and men who didn't care that they were broke as hell. Although she has been through a lot, she survived and lived to share her horror stories with us.

It is because of Denise N. Wheatley that I survived a three-hour train ride. Her novel, I WISH I NEVER MET YOU, had me laughing so hard and gasping so much that people kept staring at me wondering what was wrong with me. I didn't care and read on, getting more and more engrossed into her comical writing style and the appallingly amusing dating stories she told. There are thirteen stories divided into four sections, and the novel is full of colorful, well-portrayed characters.

The narrator is a trip! Her voice is strong and flows well throughout all the stories. While some crazy things happen, nothing is over the top. True, all the drama is believable, but I would never have imagined people would actually do some of the things done in this book. I enjoyed Wheatley's writing style. She often uses witty repetitions to hammer in a point, assist the reader in making connections, or for comic relief. The section intros and quotes are well written and appropriately placed. I enjoyed all the stories, but my favorites are the ones in The Big Payback section.

I also like how each story ends with an often amusing, but very true, bottom line. My only problem with the book is the amount of foul language, but there is a good, forewarning disclaimer at the beginning. I WISH I NEVER MET YOU is a great debut novel by Wheatley. (RAWSISTAZ Rating: 4.5)

Reviewed by Natasha T.
of The RAWSISTAZ Reviewers


Rating:
Summary: Funniest Book I've Read!
Review: Oh how I wish I could have had the nerve to do some of the things she did to those men...I've definitely dated a few of them. The quote in the intro was the thing that really struck a chord with me...somebody out there knows me too well!
If you want a good laugh, get this book!

Rating:
Summary: amusing chick lit slice and dice men short story collection
Review: She makes no apologies for her treatment of men, insisting she was not always right or wrong as all she wanted was to find her soulmate. Instead the sister insists that the highlights of her manly encounters were the dregs; some of the cretins she "dated" had genetic issues and those were higher up the food chain than several of these losers. In other words there are an overwhelmingly larger number of Mr. Wrongs than Mr. Rights.

I WISH I NEVER MET YOU is often an amusing chick lit short story collection starring a sassy (too cocky perhaps for some) in your face African-American woman. The narrator circumcises the males she encounters for containing physical, mental, emotional, or marital status failures. Some readers will be turned off by the profanity and vividly graphic descriptions of her "golden" dates with the "shiftless, stupid, and the ugly". Still well written, the audience will laugh at the antics and comments of the narrator, but also feel somewhat guilty for doing so since the protagonist is dislikable for her arrogant disregard of the feelings of others she considers her inferiors as throughout this anthology slices and dices men.

Harriet Klausner


Rating:
Summary: If quality attracted quality....
Review: You'd know what is wrong with this woman's dating life. I really didn't find it funny, I found it downright cruel.