Archer's Goon

Rating:
Summary: Things are never quite as they seem
Review: This is one of Diana Wynne-Jones's early books, and when you read it, you can tell. The prose is a bit plain and not terribly descriptive, but the plot and the sparkling characters are, as always, absolutely stunning. "Archer's Goon" is an underrated, weird little mystery involving wizards, writers, and spaceships.

Howard Sykes comes home one day to discover that an enormous Goon (small brain, big feet, limited vocabulary) is sitting in his kitchen, claiming that unless his dad Quentin produces two thousand words to "Archer," they will be in serious trouble. Turns out that Quentin promised a mysterious man two thousand words every three months, in exchange for no more writers' block. And the problem is, when the Goon shows up again and announces that the words didn't get through. Quentin swears he won't write another word, and the Goon remains in their house (he's not supposed to leave without the words).

Things immediately go haywire: Howard and his sister Awful soon discover that Archer is one of seven very pushy, devious wizards that "farm" the town they live in -- there's criminal Shine, tantrum-throwing Torquil, sewer-ruling Erskine, and a bunch of others. If Archer gets the two thousand words, he'll rule the world (or "farm" it, as they say it), but if he doesn't then any of his siblings could. What do they need the words for? And how can a pair of kids defeat a bunch of very determined wizards -- especially when some people aren't quite who they seem?

Diana Wynne-Jones is one of the best fantasy authors out there (well, she bumped into Lewis and Tolkien -- that has to be a sign), and while "Archer's Goon" is not her best, it's pretty high on the list. It's funny, cute, and seems very simple at first, but rapidly becomes very, very complex. The biggest problem is that in this book -- especially in the opening chapters, the writing is very stark and undescriptive, although it becomes much more descriptive later in the book. But the dialogue is still that great humorous Brit style, especially whenever someone talks to the Goon.

Howard is a nice (slightly bland) hero, very like a real adolescent boy in that he botches things and isn't sure what to do when his parents fight. Awful seems that way at first, but behind the insane shrieking she has a brain. The Goon is the biggest triumph of this book -- he initially seems like a simple lunkhead troll-type, but he's really a nice guy. The wizards are almost as good -- some are faking, and some are honest, and it's nearly impossible to figure out what is going on in their heads.

"Archer's Goon" is an early Diana Wynne Jones, back before Jones had reached her full potential. But this story is an entertaining romp that starts off simple, before spinning off into a wonderfully complex story.