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The Million Dollar Mermaid: An Autobiography

The Million Dollar Mermaid: An Autobiography

List Price: $14.00
Your Price: $10.50
Product Info Reviews

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Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Esther, we hardly knew you...until now
Review: For starters. Jeff Chandler dressed as a Hollywood matron. Fernando Lamas drove nude from the waist down in order to maintain a perfect crease in his skin-tight pants. Johnny Weismuller and second husband, Ben Gage, with absolutely no encouragement from anyone, removed their swimming trunks at performances and parties to proudly display gargantuan erections. A nude Busby Berkeley did his best choreographing for the mermaid's flicks while drunk and disorderly in his tub. Drunken Ava Gardner danced a twirling-skirted and pantiless flamenco with a band of gypsies at one of Franco's parties. And Esther witnessed it all. Carumba!

Davis is a rude, grudge-bearing bitch. Dietrich's a hardcore exhibitionist who insists on having even her hair and makeup done in the nude. Dahl's an icicle. Turner's a nypmphomaniac. Gene Kelly and Stanley Donen are even bitchier than Bette Davis. Dore Schary's a mean, snobbish horse's ass. Mayer is a literally foaming-at-the-mouth looney. Joan Crawford, for some reason done up as a blue parrot, addresses a non-existent audience and asks why they aren't there any more: "Was it something I said?" Greta Garbo, hiding behind sunglasses and shmata, gropes sweaters (but never buys) on a daily basis at I. Magnin. 5'2 Billy Rose at 55 or 60 crudely puts the make on 5'8 18 year-old Esther while tackily dressed in a satin dressing gown and ascot.

All this and much, so much more is related with a straight face. The Chandler chapter in particular is classic theatre of the absurd. Esther is shocked and scandalised at the sight of the tarted-up Jeff, but takes the time to catalogue his extensive wardrobe for us, including all of the hats, foundation garments and lingerie. Overall, she outdoes Ionescu. Eventually, everyone she deals with turns into some sort of rhinceros.

There are also sinister and extremely disturbing aspects. Formost is the decades-long master- slave relationship with Lamas for whom she inexplicably abandoned her very young children. Unfortunately, that wholesome image was just another MGM special effect after all.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: A PRIMER ON HOW TO REINVENT YOURSELF
Review: This is a wonderful book filled with interesting information on many celebrities, but most important, the joys, trials, and tribulations of a human beings life. The telling is outstanding using the help of Digby Diehl and each chapter was a different year of Esther Williams life. On one hand the personal discipline of the author is exemplary and on the other hand that discipline was not used or adhered to when it came to the choice of a paramore/husbands vs her children and also the financial matters of her career.

This entire story is most engrossing and points out why I love reading autobiographies as each life that is well told points out the idiosyncrasies that each of us have. I can say that Esther Williams is an extraordinary individual that did not marry well,(except for her present husband) but had a great head on her shoulders.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Illusions Shattered
Review: Tawdry. Sleazy. Clueless. One searches for words to describe this tell-all book by one of Hollywood's golden age icons. Esther's career suffered and came to a premature end because the industry and public weren't able to take her seriously as anything but a mermaid. With this incredibly banal book, she has finally proven them right. Rarely have I read of a more wasted life. Her self-destructive marital history alone is enough to make one wonder just what is inside that beautiful head. If you have any fond memories of the lovely young woman who captivated movie audiences during the 40's and 50's, stay away from this dreadful book and retain your illusions.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Fun With Franco, Outing Jeff, etc...
Review: As celebrity bios go, this one is, typically, one frenchfry short of a Happy Meal. You have to slog through a lot of goo to get to the good parts about Lana, Ava, Frank, and all the other Tinseltowners you wish you didn't find so fascinating that you would actually stoop to scrolling through bad books to read an anecdote or two...

Esther Williams, for all the vulgarity and downright bad choices and questionable values (cavorting with a Fascist dictator; revealing Jeff Chandler's couturier secrets; dragging us through her tedious marriage to a "difficult" man (read: boorish a-----e) remains, after all these years, a loveable icon. You have to admire a woman who swam for a living. Hey, it's my favorite sport, so I'm a little prejudiced.

Does anybody else agree that the most gorgeous picture of her is the one where she posed for anItalian fashion magazine? Frankly, I think she should have stayed in Italy and modeled. They like older women there, so she probably could have been doing it to this day.

Anyway, at least she made friends with her poor kids. They got the worst part of the deal - absentee mother, alcoholic father, little if nothing financially to compensate, thanks to their father's addictions and their mother's convenient naivete. But then, Esther admits all this. Actually, she really doesn't owe any of us an explanation, though she took the time to do it. She gave, as they say, at the office.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: A Dog called Fred
Review: I like Digs. The mermial was good. if you like to do it that you will like this book. If you go to the mall you're bound to find a fish called wanda. "look at the beautiful clours!" said mary joe blucasity! WoW! geeeeee willlacker! this tares my hear tares ny heart ta pieces! taaaaaa pieces!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Million Dollar Wit
Review: I found this to be just the best mixture of fun, fantasy and glamour, written by a star not known by the general public for her wit, but whose rib-tickling reminiscences hit just the right spot when you're looking for a fun read. Miss Williams's reference to Joe Pasternak and his penchant for eating spaghetti with his hands is a truly hilarious example of the strange people she often encountered in classic-era Hollywood. Good for you, Esther!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Esther Williams- a women with determination
Review: This book really brought me into the world of hollywood and every detail of her life made me relize how many hard ships that an actor/ actress has to deal with. the book was filled with humor and sadness, making you pity Esther for her terrible expeirences with many minipulitve men surrounding her, especially Fernando Llamas and Ben Gage. The only thing disturbing about this book was how frustrated I felt reading about how she was completely oblivious about how she was neglecting her children and holding on by a thread to marriages that were chewing at her soul. i recomend this book to any reader, Hey! I'm only 13 and this book was fascinating to me! it's gotten me hooked on old Hollywood and I have decided to read the biographies of some other famous actors/actresses, like Lana Turner, because I have always been a old movie fan. Read this book and trust me you will love it and never put it down!

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: What a great book
Review: Since I was a child I have been a fan of Esther Williams; her beauty, her talent, and her swimming ability. Reading her book showed me everything wasn't all that glamourous for her. I like the refreshing way she recalls events in her life and the people she had to deal with. Along with her attitude and how she learned from her mistakes along the way. I felt like she was sitting right next to me telling all these things. It's funny too the way she describes the "macho" men in her life. Boy what egos! If half of this is true it still makes interesting reading. She has great recall too. It's a great book and I enjoyed it very much.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: THE MILLION DOLLAR MERMAID
Review: A REAL INSIGHT INTO THE EARLY DAYS OF CREATING THE "HOLLYWOOD lEGEND". MS.WILLIAMS ABILITY TO STAY IN CONTROL OF HER OWN DESTINY IN THE STAR MAKING "COUCH CASTING" ERA IS FASCINATING, FUN READING. SHE HAS A STRONG SENSE OF SELF, YET ALL TOO HUMAN FAILING OF LOVING THE WRONG TYPE OF MEN. HER SENSE OF HUMOR AND OUT-SPOKEN HONESTY IS CONSTANT THROUGHOUT. SHE NEVER LOSES SIGHT OF WHO SHE IS AS A PERSON, BUT SOME OF HER DECISIONS ON HOW TO LIVE HER LIFE ARE A REAL EYE-OPENER.THIS BOOK IS VERY INFORMATIVE AND ENTERTAINING. IT WOULD MAKE A GREAT GIFT FOR SOMEONE THAT LOVES THE TRUE "MOVIE-STAR" HOLLYWOOD OF A BY GONE ERA.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: esther williams in love with esther williams
Review: good grief it must have been hard to make these movies with out co stars.she told directors how to direct,swimmers how to swim,designed costumes filled and cleaned the pool and still had time to slander a man who loved her. and on top of all this she gave up her 3 children for a guy who had a greatpenis. how lucky we are to have her.


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