Rating: Summary: Worst Conan book ever devised Review: I can't even put into words the disgust I feel for this piece of [...]. I have been waiting YEARS for a new conan book, and what comes along? Harry Turtledove's gargantuan pile of poo. This book is so inconsistent, poorly developed, and poorly written it makes my stomach roil. I am about 2/3 of the way done, and I don't think I can bring myself to read the rest of this [...]. Think I might start on another book by a REAL author, David Gemmell. The story is literally conan acting like a little turd the WHOLE book. Talk about a whiny turd, damn. The book is about as eventful as a retirement home disco. Honestly, just read it for yourself. Damn, I will just stop right now...[...]. TOR better find a better author.
Rating: Summary: This is not Conan!!!!! Review: I dont know what Harry Turtledive was thinking when he wrote this book but this is definately not Conan. He should be forced to remove the Conan name from his book. If you want to write a fantasy novel about a wimp turned hero don't use Conan's name to sell your book. Why not call the character Turtledove of midevil suberbia. Stick with the character of Conan if you write a Conan book. The character in this book is no Conan!!!!! Quit ruining a great character!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rating: Summary: Harry, stay away from Conan Review: I personally love the Conan series of books and this is the first one that completely left me without a sense of wonder and awe. The only "good" part of the book was when Conan magically found a lost city. Other than that I was bored and really glad it was a short novel. Mr. Turtledove is an accomplished writer and has some very interesting takes on alternate histories, but he needs to leave Conan to those who understand him and what makes the stories vivid and unreal at the same time. Don't waste your time on this book while there are now collected volumes of Robert E. Howard's work along with some new artists. Reread the good stuff instead of swallowing the poorly written tale of Conan's early years. Formulaic and tedious, I still don't know why I bothered to finish it.
Rating: Summary: Harry, stay away from Conan Review: I personally love the Conan series of books and this is the first one that completely left me without a sense of wonder and awe. The only "good" part of the book was when Conan magically found a lost city. Other than that I was bored and really glad it was a short novel. Mr. Turtledove is an accomplished writer and has some very interesting takes on alternate histories, but he needs to leave Conan to those who understand him and what makes the stories vivid and unreal at the same time. Don't waste your time on this book while there are now collected volumes of Robert E. Howard's work along with some new artists. Reread the good stuff instead of swallowing the poorly written tale of Conan's early years. Formulaic and tedious, I still don't know why I bothered to finish it.
Rating: Summary: awful Review: It states on the back cover that Turtledove is a "lifelong Conan fan". This just goes to show you that being a big fan doesn't mean you can recreate the object of your admiration. Harry Turtledove RUINED this book. For starters; where are all the woman-warriors? The fierce Cimmerian females? Every woman in here is a sleazy hussy, a stupid twit, or a shrewish fishwife. Half the reason I got the darned thing was because Conan's mother was mentioned in the first chapter I glanced at, and I was like "Oh, good!" But is she the brave warrior of the comics, the books, the movies? No. She's "Verina". She has tuberculosis. She reclines in bed and coughs and snaps at everyone. The only strong female character in here is the giant snake! The male characters aren't much better or easier to like. As Meave is replaced by Verina, so Nial is replaced by ineffective and plodding Mordec, who beats Conan senseless to "teach him a lesson". Balarg is annoying and unnecessary and Count Stercus, the foreign commander, the villainous invader who's supposed to be so horrible? The only horrible characteristic Turtledove could conjure was to make him a lecher of nubile girls. Hello? These characters are set roughly 10,000 years ago. 17 years old would be considered quite marriageable and matronly. All that aside, Stercus has got to be the stupidest villain alive. He gets banished from his cushy outpost to the wilds for his lecherous behavior (still not buying that, btw) and when he gets to Cimmeria what does he do? Seduce more girls! Ah, the dastardly rogue! And when his eye finally lights on a maiden in Conan's village, does he quietly spirit her away? Bribe her father? Lure her with gold and jewels? No. He courts her publicly for months, then throws her over his horse in broad daylight and drags her away kicking and screaming. As he's racing out of the village on his steed, he beheads a couple of kids. How brilliant. Conan's love interest (Tarla) is a weak, twittery git who flirts with sleazy foreign commanders, but later, after Conan rescues her, she says "it was all to make you jealous Conan!" The only good aspect to this book is that you can safely let your ten-year-old read it. Argh.
Rating: Summary: awful Review: It states on the back cover that Turtledove is a "lifelong Conan fan". This just goes to show you that being a big fan doesn't mean you can recreate the object of your admiration. Harry Turtledove RUINED this book. For starters; where are all the woman-warriors? The fierce Cimmerian females? Every woman in here is a sleazy hussy, a stupid twit, or a shrewish fishwife. Half the reason I got the darned thing was because Conan's mother was mentioned in the first chapter I glanced at, and I was like "Oh, good!" But is she the brave warrior of the comics, the books, the movies? No. She's "Verina". She has tuberculosis. She reclines in bed and coughs and snaps at everyone. The only strong female character in here is the giant snake! The male characters aren't much better or easier to like. As Meave is replaced by Verina, so Nial is replaced by ineffective and plodding Mordec, who beats Conan senseless to "teach him a lesson". Balarg is annoying and unnecessary and Count Stercus, the foreign commander, the villainous invader who's supposed to be so horrible? The only horrible characteristic Turtledove could conjure was to make him a lecher of nubile girls. Hello? These characters are set roughly 10,000 years ago. 17 years old would be considered quite marriageable and matronly. All that aside, Stercus has got to be the stupidest villain alive. He gets banished from his cushy outpost to the wilds for his lecherous behavior (still not buying that, btw) and when he gets to Cimmeria what does he do? Seduce more girls! Ah, the dastardly rogue! And when his eye finally lights on a maiden in Conan's village, does he quietly spirit her away? Bribe her father? Lure her with gold and jewels? No. He courts her publicly for months, then throws her over his horse in broad daylight and drags her away kicking and screaming. As he's racing out of the village on his steed, he beheads a couple of kids. How brilliant. Conan's love interest (Tarla) is a weak, twittery git who flirts with sleazy foreign commanders, but later, after Conan rescues her, she says "it was all to make you jealous Conan!" The only good aspect to this book is that you can safely let your ten-year-old read it. Argh.
Rating: Summary: Blown within first 5 pages Review: Life-long Conan fan that he is, Turtledove uses the Lion emblem on the Aquilonian flag/banner... this is the emblem Conan uses when he becomes king of Aquilonia about 30-40 years after the events of this tale. The pennant ought to have shown a dragon which any one who has read a Conan story in which Aquilonia is mentioned, even in passing, would know.
There are at least 13 more inconsistencies (some of them glaring) in the remainder of the work. Turledove does himself and the Hyborian age a great injury by allowing this to have been published, anyone who has read any of the pre-1990 Conan stories would do better to invest their money in an ant-farm than purchase this book.
Rating: Summary: Wasn't bad,wasn't great. Review: Not a bad story,though as one reviewer said without any sense of awe or adrenaline that you would find in an older Conan novel.
Harry,your time would have been better spent writing another Gerrin the Fox novel than a novel about a pre teen Conan with anger management problems and a crush on the girl next door.Is this how we really want to picture Conan's childhood?
Rating: Summary: HARRY IS A CONAN FAN? Review: The book states that harry is a lifelong Conan fan. Well, it must be Conan O'Brian because it certainlt isn't Conan the Barbarian. How could anyone who ever READ and any of Robert E. Howard's works ever come up with such a mess as this. I was quite excited about it as the Sack of Vanarium is the first significant event that Robert E. Howard ever mentions about the 16 year old Conan but never put it into story. I would have preferred that it wasn't now. Of course this concerns Aquilonia, the most powerful kingdom of the Hyborian world, expanding its borders deep into the northen lands and into Conan's home of Cimmeria, and of the subsequent destruction of Venarium outpost by the Cimmerians.
Poorly developed characters including Conan's mother not to mention most of the Cimmerians who come off as more like brutish stupid Picts than the powerful, yet clever warriors they were. And since when do Cimmerians live in towns??? There were tribesman. Nomadic Tribesman who lived more along the lines of native Americans in animal skinned or wood huts or even caves...but not in structures that Turtledove describes.
The action scenes are poorly paced and boring, the characters are boring, and Conan comes off in his youth as a sniveling momma's boy. Turtledove makes Roland Green look like Tolkien by comparison. Just Awful!
Rating: Summary: Thank you for ruining Conan. Review: This has to be the worst Conan book ever written. After reading the book, I have to wonder if Mr. Turtledove ever actually read a Conan book. He totally messes up on the entire idea of Cimmerians, having them live in towns!!!! Any one with any idea of the Conan mythos knows that the Cimmerians were a semi nomadic people. He also goes against the set ideas of Conan's parents, making his father a (blacksmith the only right part) natural part of the tribe (more like city) and his mother a practical sick invalid. Also, to make matters even worse, in what I feel is the biggest insult to Robert Howard and the countless other writers who have painstakingly developed the Conan series to what it is today, he makes the Cimmerians live under occupation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No Cimmerian would ever live under any type of yoke. Conan also forsakes Crom in the story and uses poisoned weapons another huge mistake turtledove incorporates into HIS Conan, and I say HIS for any true Conan fan would know that this is not the real Conan being depicted. On top of all the insulting depictions of Conan, the book is poorly written, with battle scenes being quick, tepid, and not at all detailed. Do yourself a favor and pick up any of TOR's other Conan books and stay away from this piece of garbage unless you want to make yourself purposely mad.
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