The Master's Degree

Rating:
Summary: Masters Degree?
Review: "Finally," we thought, "We'll get a thoughtful and inspired approach to marriage." As a couple that works hard at marriage and constantly seeks improvement, the concept of taking marriage as seriously as a graduate degree captured our interest. This book came recommended by someone whose faith we admire, and after reading the few reviews listed here, we purchased it. Unfortunately, it was the worst among a long list of disappointments we've had with Christian "self-help" or "inspirational" books.

The reasons for our disappointment are too many to list here, so we've narrowed our complaints down to four.

We never felt that the book presented anything of depth on any of the topics it addressed, especially for a book whose title references graduate level education. Instead, the author's present trite information that skims the surface of the issues. Often we found ourselves observing whole passages that used a lot of pleasant words but never really said anything. For example, "Romance is a necessary component because it shades the landscape of love with brilliant, uncommonly cited colors which can only be found in the far-reaches of creation--the depths of a woman's heart."

A "submissive wife/spiritual head husband" approach to Marriage is evident throughout the book, but particularly highlighted in Chapters 6 and 7. Despite the almost universal adoption of this doctrine by evangelical Christianity, we disagree with the exegesis used to support this doctrine and have not found it relevant in our marriage.

The book was poorly written. Like many self-help books today, it was chock full of pop culture references ("Like the Lone Ranger and Tonto, Bunny and I dressed quickly") which, in our opinion, are shallow replacements for a clean prose style peppered with profound metaphors. Where there are metaphors, they are often mixed: "A man longs to explore the farthest reaches of love, to lift up the one who is the object of his pursuit and the aim of his pulse." Where does your pulse aim?--its almost gruesome. We also couldn't help but notice the frequently mentioned experiences the authors have had in the entertainment and publishing industry--when I produced this hit song, when we were invited to be on this hit talk show, in my book this, when I did this radio show, when we were teaching at this conference. Intentional or not, this subtle boasting grew annoying and came across somewhat self-absorbed.

The book also seemed to have a very specific target audience--upper class, white, Protestant Americans in their 50's to 60's with all the platitudinal, stereotypical values and cultural norms advocated by that generation and culture. In the section on Romance, one of the suggestions given will testify: "Sacrifice if you have to, but try and provide for your wife a maid or housekeeping assistance." Nuff said.

If you want graduate-level thinking on marriage, try Mike Mason's, "The Mystery of Marriage." Rather than offering neat and clean answers, packaged in sound-bite doses, Mason chooses to wrestle with marriage's many mysteries, much like those of us who are married do.

Rating:
Summary: Awful Marriage!
Review: I read this really expecting a blessing but didn't feel blessed at all. This couple fought so often and said so many horrible things to each other that I couldn't believe it.Their self-centerdness and explosive anger was amazing.I felt more depressed by the book than uplifted.They had no constructive advice only superficial junk.I honestly find it hard to believe that they are happy today though they say they are.Two books I can highly reccomend for wives are "Finding the hero in your husband" and "The politically incorrect wife" They are both much more enlightening and helpful than the above book.

Rating:
Summary: Wonderful Marriage Guide
Review: This book is absolutely wonderful, and fun to read. It helped my husband and I through our first year of marriage, and equipped us with tools and principles that are practical. The best thing about them is you can begin to use them immediately. The activities at the end of each chapter are great and set the stage for future exploration in several areas of your marriage.

Rating:
Summary: Wonderful Marriage Guide
Review: This book is absolutely wonderful, and fun to read. It helped my husband and I through our first year of marriage, and equipped us with tools and principles that are practical. The best thing about them is you can begin to use them immediately. The activities at the end of each chapter are great and set the stage for future exploration in several areas of your marriage.

Rating:
Summary: Much To Be Gleaned From This One!
Review: Upon reading the first few pages I thought this was going to be another husband and wife team patting each other on the back for being so wonderful and insightful while providing nothing of real substance for the reader. However, when feelings of conjecture come over me like that I find that I don't usually put a book down but like to read on to confirm or refute my presupposition. In this case I was happily surprised.

Throughout the book Frank and Bunny candidly expose their warts and weaknesses and use them to effectively demonstrate how by applying sound biblical doctrine they were able to work through a variety of serious relational difficulties. I was moved by the way they use their deep love for each other as a catalyst to honestly confront their personal demons and reign in their egos. It became quite evident that there was a power struggle going on in their marriage and without looking to Christ and scripture and subsequently delving into the dynamics of the personal roles God intended for each of them it doesn't appear there would have been much hope for its survival.

Bunny and Frank took the much maligned submission/spiritual head doctrine and really cast a brilliant light on it. Again looking to their own relationship which seemed to be quite volatile in it's infancy they masterfully illustrate how introspection and mutual supplication to God can profoundly transform two people into one mind. Their story is a compelling testimony to the victory that can be established when the Holy Spirit intervenes for believers and Christ-like love becomes the focal point of any marriage.