Connecting

Rating:
Summary: Generally solid, but some overreaching
Review: Crabb introduces this work by claiming he has experienced a shift in thinking. He proposes that more is needed to minister to emotional needs than just psychological training or biblical theology. He asserts that connected relationships are the missing link in touching the hearts and souls of hurting people.

Crabb describes three elements of "connecting" with others, and then through the remainder of the book elaborates on each. The first element is a taste of Christ delighting in us. As we display this same kind of delight in the personalities and lifestyles of others, our relationships are transformed. The second element is a diligent search for what is good. Rather than just identifying what is sinful, or trying to fix what is wrong, we discover what God is doing in others lives then affirm it. The third element is an engaging exposure of what is bad or painful. This element must always follow the first two elements, but may not always be necessary. When it is exercised however, it exposes the bad in order to unleash the good.

I wholeheartedly endorse Crabb's work here -- the more we as believers can "connect" with other believers in the body of Christ, the stronger and healthier we can become. For the depth of the subjects covered, Crabb does a remarkable job of making his words pleasant to read and his train-of-thought easy to follow. I recommend this book to all persons wanting to discover new strength and healing through connected relationships in Jesus Christ.

Rating:
Summary: Crabb Identifies the Missing Link in Emotional Healing!
Review: Crabb introduces this work by claiming he has experienced a shift in thinking. He proposes that more is needed to minister to emotional needs than just psychological training or biblical theology. He asserts that connected relationships are the missing link in touching the hearts and souls of hurting people.

Crabb describes three elements of "connecting" with others, and then through the remainder of the book elaborates on each. The first element is a taste of Christ delighting in us. As we display this same kind of delight in the personalities and lifestyles of others, our relationships are transformed. The second element is a diligent search for what is good. Rather than just identifying what is sinful, or trying to fix what is wrong, we discover what God is doing in others lives then affirm it. The third element is an engaging exposure of what is bad or painful. This element must always follow the first two elements, but may not always be necessary. When it is exercised however, it exposes the bad in order to unleash the good.

I wholeheartedly endorse Crabb's work here -- the more we as believers can "connect" with other believers in the body of Christ, the stronger and healthier we can become. For the depth of the subjects covered, Crabb does a remarkable job of making his words pleasant to read and his train-of-thought easy to follow. I recommend this book to all persons wanting to discover new strength and healing through connected relationships in Jesus Christ.

Rating:
Summary: Generally solid, but some overreaching
Review: Crabb's basic thesis is that most non-biological mental dissorders are spiritual/emotional in nature and can be cured through mature, nurturing Christian relationships. The church is challenged to become a place where these relationships can happen.

All well and good; however, Crabb's writing style (typical of his other works, as well) often slips into poetic, nearly mystical reveries that leave even the most intelligent readers bewildered - it's hard to digest 50 pages extolling the magic virtues of "connecting" when the term's barely been defined and Crabb has yet to provide a single step on how to practice this lost art. Also, Crabb needs to do a better job articulating the difference between an organically-caused, neurological illness (e.g., OCD, ADHD, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, Tourette's, developmental stuttering, etc.) on one hand, and emotional disorders on the other. In many cases, the distinction isn't clear; Crabb seems to put panic disorder, borderline personality disorder, avoidant personality disorder, etc. in the latter category, but there is a lot of research to suggest that these disorders are actually biologically-rooted as well.

Rating:
Summary: How I want this to become a reality!
Review: I am a college student studying psychology and sociology, and have been searching for a new but different way to help people. Larry Crabb wonderfully articulates how christians must learn to connect to God and other people to really impact there lives. Connecting is the ministry that Christ left for us to follow. Thank you Dr. Crabb for putting into words what I have been thinking for a long time.

Rating:
Summary: catalyst for powerful life transformation and healing
Review: I am amazed at the journey that God is starting to stir up, to invite us to a life of genuine authentic relating with one another, and this book insightfully culminates Crabb's journey thus far in learning to share about the essence of how God is at work in our heart, to move into others lives powerfully, to relate in such a way that it calls out the vision that God has already implanted in us when we started the journey by trusting in Christ. Don't settle for the lesser satisfaction of life, defense mechanisms, feeling adequate, living on your own resources, trying to make life work. Move out in faith, into the deeper reality of life and relating!

Rating:
Summary: Practical Spirtual Encouragement
Review: I read the book 1st time in 1997 with a so so opinion. I recently listened to the audio and re-read the book. The difference is that I now need the spiritual direction in encouragement through spiritual commnuity. I found it to be powerfully and scripturally practical for those who have a faith in the power of the gospel and the Holy Spirit. It also helps to have read INSIDE OUT.

Rating:
Summary: Good motivational book
Review: The book focused on "connecting" with people. Dr. Larry Crabb's point is to show that the true way to help others is not by using clever therapeutic techniques. Dr. Crabb believes "there is a power within the life of every Christian waiting to be released," which he believes can lead to "further and deeper change," to help people "join more intimately to the heart of Christ," and heal "soul wounds" by allowing God's grace to "flow freely through us to them." From the standpoint of a counselor, showing care for someone is more than just checking on their mental well-being-it is about enjoying their presence. People must be able to feel that counselors truly care about them, which is the whole premise of "connecting."

Dr. Crabb shared a story of his oldest son. No matter how much he would try to help his child on a psychological level, he continued his destructive pattern. One day, instead of nagging and pointing to obvious mistakes, he decided to ask him, "How can I help?" Those simple words had connected with his son, who finally felt like his father really cared about him (4). He was never the same again. Dr. Crabb stated, "When we look for the bad, we must always be looking harder for the hidden good (12)." In the midst of trials, we are to "search for the good God may be releasing (16)."

Although I enjoyed the book, I found some of the counseling suggestions to be vague. For example, in pages 16-17, Dr. Crabb presents a scenario of a couple during a counseling session. The wife snaps at the husband because she feels unappreciated by him. Instead of acknowledging her anger, probing for a psychological explanation, or expressing empathy, Dr. Crabb proposes that the "good urges" be released from the counselees. It seemed he was making the wife see things from a different perspective-not necessarily releasing "good urges."

Counselors have been taught to be listeners and guides, but Dr. Crabb suggests that counselor and counselee "walk together as honest strugglers (99)." I agree with this suggestion to a point. I realize that it is not healthy for counselees to believe that counselors are without problems. I think that if a counselor is more honest about themselves and their vulnerability, then the counselee will not see him/herself as a "lost cause." Part of being "real" with others is for others to know that "things" happen in the counselor's life as well-they are not immune to Satan's attacks. However, the counselor's primary focus should be on the counselee's struggle. The counselor's struggles should not be shared on the same level as the counselee's. I think it would be too overwhelming for the counselee to be fully subjected to the counselor's struggle.

I found the questions on page 161 very helpful. The "think vision" questions go beyond problematic issues and raises therapeutic counseling to a higher level. The basic idea is to bathe everything in prayer and concentrate on "who that person could become (165)" by "releasing the energy of Christ." I thought the most useful part of the book was in the appendices. These were practical information for counselors. The role of the church is examined in the context of soul care because friendships and a sense of community can heal people with "soul struggles."

Dr. Crabb wrote, "We'll smile at our spouses with a new kind of appreciation and kindness, and they will soften and move toward us. We'll see people whom we know don't like us, and we'll sincerely wish them well without feeling self-righteous (185). He also noted, "Goodness is most fully released only when badness is first resisted (18)." He explained, "When a friend meets our meanness with kindness, something better often comes out of us (18)." This is not a new concept. He was merely stating an obvious response to kindness. In fact, this statement illustrated biblical principles: "Bless those who curse you (Luke 6)" and "Repay no one evil for evil...live peaceably with all men (Romans 12)."

Dr. Crabb has found a way to apply biblical principles to the everyday life of a believer. "Connecting" is a way to build a nurturing and supportive community. If all Christians were to incorporate the simple concept of "blessing those who curse you," then the "connecting" process will take place. If people did this, then soul healing will no longer be dependent on "mental health professional." This book was a good resource for motivating people to go beyond themselves in reaching out to others with Christ-like compassion.


Rating:
Summary: Not What I Expected
Review: This book is mostly stories and illustrations. I also had difficulty following his reasoning on occasions. Perhaps I was expecting something like the excellent "Psychology, Theology, and Spirituality in Christian Counseling" by Mark McMinn, or even something like "Competent to Counsel" by Jay Adams. It would also have been helpful if the author had included some helpful sources. JB Myers

Rating:
Summary: Christ in you------- talking to Christ in someone else.
Review: This one book will open your mind to the deep truths of the Bible more than any other book ever written. It clearly shows you who you are in the flesh and who you are in the spirit ( Christ in you) With this insight,you can now do a better job of portraying Jesus to a world caughtup in fear and lonlyness. This book is so good we are starting a class on it at church.

Rating:
Summary: We must grasp these concepts!
Review: When we read "Connecting" we were so excited that someone had put into words concepts that we had been trying to live for some time. We have experienced the power of what connecting relationships can do for you; giving you hope and encouragement that perhaps all is not lost when things are looking bleak. This book is about developing faith vision for each other, and about believing more in what God says is true than what the circumstances say. It is about becoming "safe" people...developing relationships with people in such a way that they know you and still believe in you. It may not be popular since it is not an "instant fix" book, neither is it a "Follow these 16 steps to healing" book. It is about learning to be real with yourself and a few other people so that we can truly encourage one another in the Lord.