Rating: 
Summary: a book to find meaning in perilous times
Review: I was just finishing this book in September 2001 when the events of 9-11 turned the world upside down, and things truly fell apart. There suddenly were all the vulnerable feelings that Pema Chödrön encourages us to embrace: fear, sorrow, loneliness, groundlessness. And in the days of shock and grief that followed, there was that brief and abundant display of "maitri," or loving kindness, which emerged in waves of generosity and compassion for one another. For a while, we were in the world that she points to as an alternative to the everyday routine of getting, spending, and constant activity.It is nearly impossible to summarize or characterize this fine book. In some 150 pages it covers more than a person could hope to absorb in many years, if not a lifetime. We may know the Buddha's famous insight that human pain and suffering result from desire and aversion. But few writers have been able to articulate as well as Chödrön the implications of that insight in ways that make sense to the Western mind. As just one example from this book, her discussion of the "six kinds of loneliness" (chap. 9) illustrates how our desires to achieve intimacy with others are an attempt to run away from a deep experience of ourselves. Our continuing efforts to establish security for ourselves are a denial of fundamental truths, which prevents our deeply experience of the joy of living. Our reluctance to love ourselves and others shrivels our hearts. Chödrön invites us to be fascinated, as she is, by paradox. On hopelessness and death (chap. 7) she writes: "If we're willing to give up hope that insecurity and pain can be exterminated, then we can have the courage to relax with the groundlessness of our situation. This is the first step on the path." She gets us to acknowledge our restlessness (even our spiritual restlessness) for what it is, something we do instead of simply paying attention to ourselves in the moment and to what happens next, without judgment or preconceptions. In addition to this book, I recommend acquiring one or more of her audio tapes and hearing her voice as she speaks before audiences. For all the high-mindedness that may come across in descriptions like the one above, or what you might take away by reading the cover of her book, Chödrön is down to earth and unpretentious, speaking in her American accent (don't let the appearance of her name fool you) and with a self-effacing sense of humor. Her message is in her manner, as much as it is in what she says. This is a book to buy and read, and reread at intervals, for it is always new, always speaking to you exactly where you are, right now.
Rating:
Summary: A book to keep - forever
Review: I first read this book when I was going through a difficult time. I expected some soothing and comforting words; I did not expect a message that made me look at Life in a different light. Pema Chodron's words touched my heart deeply: things are impermanent, and the search for security and a semblance of permanence draw us deeper into chaos. Its time to stop seeking an escape from depression and other negative emotions; instead we can try to get intimate with these emotions and the true nature of our minds, cultivate mindfulness and compassion, and stop struggling so hard to find ground. This book touched me deeply; I have revisited it many times since, during good and bad times, and the message gets a little clearer every time. Thank you Pema, thank you ever so much.
Rating:
Summary: Great work
Review: Pema Chodron is a beloved American Buddhist nun who trained under Chogyam Trungpa, the at times controversial Tibetan meditation master. Yet whatever qualms you may have in mind about him, please don't let that taint your perception of Pema. She is truly a shining, clear and loving teacher among us today. In this book Pema draws from the traditional Buddhist wisdom in order to give us thorough and kindhearted advice on what to do when, as the title suggests, "things fall apart." There is only one approach that grants lasting benefit, Pema tells us here, and that entails approaching these situations with openness and inquisitiveness. Teaching us to embrace our painful emotions, she shows the way on how to gain both wisdom and compassion not just towards and for ourselves, but for all people. "The Tibetan Buddhist equivalent of Harold Kushner's "When Bad Things Happen To Good People." - Publishers Weekly "This is a book that could serve you for a lifetime." - Natural Health Magazine
Rating:
Summary: Amazing Book
Review: This book is amazing. I have also read her book "The Places that Scare You", but I liked this book more. I read it during a tumultuous time in my life and found it very inspiring. What I liked the most about this book was Pema's recognition that going through difficult times IS an unpleasant experience, and even for people that have been doing this for years, following these philosophies can be a constant work-in-process. This was reassuring. The ideas she discusses, such as acknowledging the pain instead of distracting yourself, are certainly different than what we learn in our "quick-fix" Western culture. I highly recommend this book to anyone that is going through a difficult time in their life--even if you don't follow or agree with her ideas, it's still worth reading.
Rating:
Summary: Not for the faint of heart!
Review: This book has resided on the shelf next to my bed for many years and has been read often. Reading through a few reviews at this site it is clear many people are willing to listen to Pema Chodron's uncompromising words about the challenges of being human. For those people seeking a few comforting bromides, who expected a self-help book, this material must surely be unwelcome. But it is far from trite and certainly not depressing. Tibetan Buddhists practice in the charnal grounds not because they're depressives, but because life ends in death for all of us. And charnal grounds in Tibet were places where hacked up bodies were fed to circling vultures...no quickly slipping a deceased body into a casket to avoid confronting the withered body or the odors associated with illness and death for these Buddhists. When I attended a Pema Chodron lecture some years ago she announced that her favorite manta is "Om, grow up!" It takes great courage to meet life on life's terms and accept responsiblity for our actions. And since life invariably brings challenges associated with disappointment and loss, the work continues to the moment of death. In our addicted society, that is a message all too readily rejected. Pema is not for the faint of heart! But if you intend to claim your aliveness, to risk intimacy, to share joy, her words are worth attending to. Namaste.
Rating:
Summary: Infinite Power for Living
Review: I grew up and was deeply involved in a moderate Baptist church. For much of my life I considered myself a "good" Christian who knew that Jesus died for my sins and therefore I also knew that I was bound for heaven. But it wasn't until I was 40 years old and had seen my life fall apart that I decided to let go of my life completely, and give it to God. Interestingly, after this total commitment and release to God, I was immediately and strangely drawn to the biblical book of Ecclesiastes. Many wonder why this book was included in the bible because it seems to contain nothing but the pervading theme of hopelessness. Yet, its words seemed to give me comfort and a source of spiritual strength. It was difficult for me then to explain this to other Christians. Pema's book is a kind of contemporary practical application of the teaching found in Ecclesiastes. Of course our lives and our world are utterly evanescent. Nothing lasts. Yet, most of us become quite delusional during our lives by effectively denying this fact. We grab hold of anything we can that can give us a sense of a sustainable and unique identity... including our religious tradition. But any or all of this can be taken away in an instant. Both Pema's and Ecclesiastes' teachings have the power to bring us home by helping us to discover our eternal identity in the unmanifest... in the mystery of Infinite Spirit. Once we find our home there, nothing can shake us. There is a power and a joy that is not fully describable with words... because its source lies beyond words, beyond creation. In one of Jesus' prayers he asks God to bring all people into Oneness... "may they be One as we are One." Pure Oneness implies the loss (even death) of a separate identity, and the realization of a universal identity as One. Pema's use of the idea of hopelessness is really the movement through the death of our false and fleeting separate identities into the ultimate home of Oneness with each other and with God. I believe that Pema's teachings can aid any one that is ready, whose ego has been broken enough, to discover their eternal home even as they live in this manifested world. This can be a liberated life filled with the courage and fearlessness to bring Unconditional Love to the whole world, and especially to the seemingly unlovable.
Rating:
Summary: Leaning into life's sharp points.
Review: Life's difficult times may be inevitable, but they're not a prerequisite for appreciating the 146 pages of wisdom found in this book. Pema Chodron is the director of Gampo Abbey in Pleasant Bay, Nova Scotia. WHEN THINGS FALL APART pays respect to her teacher, Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche. We learn in the book's title essay, before becoming a Buddhist nun, Chodron survived the anger of a failed marriage. In truth, she writes, it saved her life (p. 10). Chodron's experience illustrates the point of the 22 "teachings" contained within this book: "Life is a good teacher and a good friend" (p. 10). Life, Chodron observes, "is like riding a train sitting backwards" (p. 143). Leaning into the sharp points along the way is the kind of instruction we can apply to our lives to bring about "revolutionary changes in how we perceive things" (p. 139). The thorny path through hope, fear, death, loneliness, opinion and chaos should not be avoided. It is the goal. I have now read Chodron's book twice. It is like a heart-to-heart encounter with an insightful friend. Thank you, Pema Chodron. G. Merritt
Rating: 
Summary: OVERATED and MIND NUMBINGLY BORING
Review: I do not understand the fascination with Pema Chodron's works. Her voice sounds like somenoe who has never known a day of joy in her life. She is extremely repressed sounding and sucks the life out of LIFE. I felt like I was chocking on cardboard listening to her. While I agree with her that we shouldn't contine to believe that we can creat a permanence to our lives her way is just as devoid of seeing the truth. Lovingkindness and Compassion are what makes life worthwhile but I felt like my mind was being dragged over cement listening to how she thought we should go about accomplishing this. There are plenty of teachers who are better such as Jack Kornfield or Sharon Salzburg who seem to convey some of these ideas in a way that feels compassionate. I think Pema just has catchy titles for her books. She also offers no reasonable way to live out these teachings in a way that works towards peace or the caretaking of our planet.
Rating: 
Summary: Buddhism and compassion simplified
Review: This book tells you what is most important, have compassion for yourself first, then you can have compassion for others.
Rating: 
Summary: This book will mislead you from the real path
Review: I reviewed this book last year and gave it five stars. But now I give it 0 stars because my life since then has been a hopeless living. I followed Pema's advice, but my question is what is the purpose in the lifestyle she is recommending. There is no goal. You live your life like a machine without any hope. This book is the highest form of DECEPTION I have ever seen. Pema might be doing this knowingly or unknowingly. I do not know her intentions. But this book should be rephrased as hopeless living. Now I have hope and a goal in life. If people are thinking how. I found Christ who many people including me did not know what he is or who he is. Christ was God himself who manifested in the form of flesh so as to show us the way of life and how we can lead a victorious life (victory over mind and evil) by walking in God's ability, not human abilities. Because for generations humans have been trying to perfect their life by their own abilities and failed. No one could be consistent. Now I assure you that you will find consistency when you hold the hands of Christ.
| 
