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Bringing Up Boys: Practical Advice and Encouragement for Those Shaping the Next Generation of Men

Bringing Up Boys: Practical Advice and Encouragement for Those Shaping the Next Generation of Men

List Price: $22.99
Your Price: $15.63
Product Info Reviews

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Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Great advice if you live in the 1950's
Review: Dobson's book contains lots of solid advice for raising boys if you believe society is stuck in the 1950's. There is no doubt Dobson does a fine job of outlining his theories on parenting and the book is well written and easy to read. However, Dobson's approach is extremely conservative, explicitly fundamentalist Christian in leaning, and simply outdated on several topics. This leads, in my view, to an unbalanced viewpoint on many issues. For example, Dobson seems to encourage boys to deny their more sensitive qualities and to denounce more traditionally feminine feelings in favor of the old-school "be a man" advice. You will find a much more balanced view of the challenges boys actually face today in William Pollack's "Real Boys". I would like to add a few comments regarding Dobson's chapter on homosexuality. It is unfortunate that a "Doctor" of Dobson's caliber and renown would remain so blatantly ignorant on such an important topic. His advice in this chapter is WRONG, WRONG, WRONG. It is based almost entirely on his particular brand of Christianity and has nothing whatever to do with facts or scientific research. ... Dobson chooses to ignore the volumes of evidence presented by the American Psychiatric Association and the American Psychological Association and instead calls homosexuality a "disorder". Dobson chooses to perpetuate myths and stereotypes regarding the origin and nature of homosexuality and he clings desperately to a belief that being gay is bad, sinful, or unhealthy. It is views like his that are actually responsible for the terrible burden placed upon young gay males. This chapter is reprehensible and Dobson should be ashamed for writing it. He also claims homosexuality can be "cured" or reversed, although he fails to provide one shred of clinical or scientific evidence to back up this claim. It is simply an ignorant view. So, in summary buy this book if you want to stick your head in the sand, but don't expect it to be effective in helping to raise a son in today's world.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: politics aside, there is little practical advice here
Review: If you've read the other reviews of this book, you'll see that for the most part liberals rate it a 1 and conservatives rate it a 5. I agree with stacey2 from Georgia, that if you are conservative and want a soapbox-type book, you'll love this one. But mostly I agree with her in that I was also disappointed that Dobson spends so much time with his agenda--describing the problems in our history, sociology, and politics--and so little time giving practical advice on what a mom should do day-to-day.

The most important thing for you to know about this book is that it isn't going to give you many suggestions or ideas that you probably couldn't think of on your own. You don't have to take my word for it--find it on a bookstore shelf, flip to any page, and just start reading. There were some stories and excerpts that I found comforting. (I'm not the only mom whose boy has gotten in trouble for running on the playground!) But they were few and far between. I'm a single mom raising a young son with very little male influence in his life. I needed help! I felt cheated to have spent the money on this book when this kind of writing is probably a better fit for a free newsletter, an editorial column, or a speech to congress.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Absolutely Right On Target
Review: It would not be an exaggeration to say that the survival of western civilization itself will depend on the next generation of men. These are today's boys that are attacked from all directions from militant feminists, liberal educators and social engineers, the entertainment industry, and even homosexual predators. The highly respected family psychologist and author Dr. James Dobson has provided a needed wake up call to parents who have been bullied and intimidated into conforming to the radical left's mission to "feminize" America, or who have been too harried and busy to notice the increasingly hostile environment engulfing our sons. Over the past 35 years masculine virtues such as physical strength, courage, and self sacrifice have been attacked and ridiculed, leaving a generation of young men without the sense of direction, duty or purpose that was well defined and developed for all previous generations of American men. Dr. Dobson challenges us to reinforce the unique position boys and men play in a healthy society. Fathers especially have an important role not only by modeling positive masculine behavior such as providing leadership, spiritual direction and protection for the family, but by developing competence and instilling confidence in his boys. There is great advice here for mothers and well, even single mothers who have the daunting task of finding positive male role models for their sons. As far as the negative reviews here, all I can say is if you speak the truth it is inevitable that enemies will arise against you.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: The Family Toolbox
Review: As a father of three teenage sons, I've not only survived but also enjoyed the adventure of "bringing up boys". One of the most important missing links in modern society is the relationship between father and son. Too many boys are growing up with non-existent fathers, non-custodial fathers or overly busy father. I know single moms who are raising their sons with wisdom, excellence, love and faith. I applaud them. I know non-custodial fathers who go out of their way to be actively involved in the lives of their children every other weekend and commute long-distances to connect up with their children at sporting events or music recitals. I celebrate them. I also know dads who've invested their best time and energy into their employment, their careers, letting those precious years of parenting slip away out of neglect. What a blessed world this would be if every child could grow up in a home where mom and dad, along with grandfather and grandmother, along with many other supporting adults, took an active interest in lovingly "bringing up boys". Our modern world is in need of such resources Dobson offers in his latest book. "Bringing Up Boys" is filled with good instruction, insights and information about parenting, especially parenting sons. Unfortunately, due to Dobson's polemical way of communicating, many parents who would otherwise benefit from his biblical, down-to-earth insights on raising boys will likely be put off by some elements in this book. For two other practical books on parenting, I recommend THE FAMILY CLOISTER: BENEDICTINE WISDOM FOR THE HOME (New York: Crossroad, 2000), and THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY TOOLBOX: 52 BENEDICTINE ACTIVITIES FOR THE HOME (New York: Crossroad, 2001), both by David Robinson.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: What Everyone Should Know
Review: James Dobson did a wonderful job of imparting practical advice to parents. It's a book long overdue. I am so optimistic after reading this! I want to shout to the world about another book that is perfect together with "Bringing Up Boys", that I have also read, called "West Point" by Norman Thomas Remick. It was my little secret. Now I want everyone to know. Like Mr. Dobson's "Bringing Up Boys", this book is also what everyone should know, and what's more, is equally as valid for "bringing up girls"!

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: I'm a conservative Christian, and this book scares me!
Review: About 10 years ago it seemed that we were making progress in getting people to understand that gender is mostly a social construction. We were putting behind us the neanderthals who take American "he-man," "if you're not an athlete you're not a man" ideas of masculinity and have the gall to call them genetic and Christian. Especially disgusting are the folks like Dobson who call themselves Christians but who clearly would consider the Jesus of the Gospels to be much too emotionally androgynous for their "Christian" tastes.

But now from John Gray to James Dobson, we have people who insist on reinforcing rather than breaking down gender stereotypes. Dobson has even said that, because in cave man days men went out and hunted and women stayed home, well, gee, that must mean that today men should go out and work and women (because it's in their genetic make-up) should stay home. It's enough to reduce any intelligent 21st century human being to exasperated caveman-or-woman cries of UGH!

Anyway, if you want your son to grow up to be as much of a sexist as James Dobson, then by all means follow the advice in this book.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: I wish I could recommend this book.......
Review: .
.... but I can't. There's really nothing new here.

If you want to read a book that is both insightful and practical, try Robert Lewis' Raising a Modern Day Knight. This is an excellent book for those who have no "Manhood" plan at all for their sons. For those who do have a game plan for their sons, Lewis' book will be a great resource in the firming up of those plans. Raising a Modern Day Knight by Robert Lewis is definitely a "Five Star" book! Don't waste your time with Bringing Up Boys.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Bringing Up Boys
Review: Dr. James Dobson does it again! Some may wonder, "why a book specifically on raising boys?" Bringing Up Boys is a truly remarkable book. First of all, Dr. Dobson has always given the best advise about parenting and family life, which is grounded in Biblical fundamentals. The book's subtitle very well explains the reason for this book: Practical advice and encouragement for those shaping the next generation of men. Of course you know that I had to get the book (actually, I got the audio-book,) since I am raising two boys.
It seems we live in a time when the role of men in our society is being muddled by various entities. Dr. Dobson makes us aware of these forces and reveals to us the Biblical role of men and what parents and other caring adults need to do to ensure that our boys grow up knowing their role in society. The physiological, mental, and attitudinal differences between boys and girls are examined. Dr. Dobson also points out the unique contribution fathers make in raising boys.
Who needs to read this book? Parents of boys AND parents of girls. Teachers, law enforcers, Bible school teachers, pastors and youth workers should also read this book. As a matter of fact, anyone who has contact with boys or men need to read what Dr. Dobson has written. This book will help you to be a character builder.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Expert Advice???
Review: Parenting any child in this new century is an incredible challenge -- no matter the gender!

Fortunately, when parents are interested in becoming more informed on the developmental needs of kids, we have some wonderful resources available in print to assist them. James Dobson's book is not one of the resources I can endorse. In fact, I would urge parents to steer clear of this book. It could be harmful to your son.

Intellectually, we have come to better understand that our girls and boys each have distinct needs as a result of their gender. There are some outstanding books that have been published in recent times that can truly be credited with launching better understandings of the differences of the developmental needs of each sex.

Reviving Ophelia, Real Boys, Ophelia Speaks, Real Boys Speak, Cain and Abel, and many others have been enormously helpful in giving us some excellent information on girls and boys, and in contributing approaches to helping each gender best meet their distinct developmental needs.

Sadly, James Dobson's book is not among these titles. Nor, should it be!

Dobson's book on Boys is laid out as a series of logical and important topics. I was anxious to have the opportunity to read more on his outline on the important issues he indicated he would cover. My hopefulness ended by Chapter 2; my anger followed soon afterward.

Dobson provides simplistic, even possibly dangerous advice to parents of adolescent boys. I can only conclude that the fact that he represents himself as "an expert" on the family is terrifying. It is clear that healthy boys are not Dobson's agenda. His is a religious agenda -- one that is willing to sacrifice objective information for a fundamentalist Christian agenda. That agenda permeates this book, not any genuine interest in raising healthy men for tomorrow's world.

Throughout this book, I found myself thinking: "Please Dr. Dobson, don't go there; don't say these things to parents; please, don't endanger boys lives with this kind of advice."... And sadly, what I found was that the book simply got worse.

By way of only one area of illustration I point out Dobson's information and advice to parents who find their son to be sexually ambivalent or confused. In this section Dobson decries the American Psychiatric Association and tells parents not to have their sons counseled by one of these professionals because of the 1973 (29 years ago Dr. Dobson!) decision to remove Homosexuality from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual. I am not sure whom Dobson believes should counsel boys in conflict, or what kind of training and education they should possess? But our trained physician/psychiatrists and certified psychological experts don't meet Dobson's standards? Who does?

Dobson's simple and biased panacea for dealing with this important concern and in a number of other situations he covers throughout his book quite simply scare me. I am afraid for parents and I am even more fearful for the boys whose parents may follow Dobson's 'expert' advice in trying to help them. Parents who are looking for balanced information on raising their sons sadly won't find it here.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: A Guide To Taking Charge In The The Raising Of Your Boy
Review: A fantastic book, pulls no punches. I didn't agree with everything, and most people won't, either.

That doesn't detract from the main theme: That modern society and culture, and virtually every institution that interacts our boys is failing them, as are most parents.

From TV to teachers, boys are being shaped in un-natural ways by forces with agendas and others with false ideas, and in some instances by sheer laziness. The wreckage can be seen daily as you walk through our culture.

Mr. Dobson's book will point you towards building a more traditional, stronger man as a goal. It's the same role model so disparaged by a wide range of special interest groups.

A strong, emotionally healthy, masculine, and loving man is a threat to these groups, but will be a joy to a future spouse, children, employer, community, and country.


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