How to Work with Just About Anyone : A 3-Step Solution for Getting Difficult People to Change

Rating:
Summary: Pretty good
Review: I read a great deal of personal growth/self help books. This one has some good ideas, but it's not as good as alot of ones I've read. I must admit that Gill is a good, clear writer, and that she obviously understands the underlying theory that her suggestions are based on. She uses alot of examples to illustrate her points. The book is well laid out and easy to follow. I particularly like that it contains a summary of the steps at the end. The author also provides a (too brief) bibliography to give readers a chance to get more information and support in using the techniques presented.

Despite the fact that the book does have good points, and some people will probably find it useful, I didn't find it particularly helpful for me overall (although I did agree with certain points -- notably, the idea that people have a tendency to repeat the same mistakes). It's too short, and I find that the techniques she suggests, which are based on the work of Brief Therapists such as Paul Wazlawick, are too cognitively based -- I have an admitted bias against cognitive behaviourism. In my experience, some of the techniques she suggests are superficial and they don't lead to long term change. They don't get to the root of the issues between people and really allow you to connect and improve the relationship. If you want to do that, this book won't help.

If you just want to get along well enough to achieve a task, and aren't really interested in the long term health of the relationship or achieving true communication, some of the ideas here might work. But this approach deals with the symptoms, it doesn't get to the root of problems. Some would go so far as to say it involves being manipulative -- I'm not sure.

If you have some familiarity with solution focused therapy/thinking, and you generally believe in the benefits of that orientation, you will find this book of value. If, like me, you prefer a more humanistic, person-centred theory, you likely won't get as much out of this book. I'm glad I read it, and I did take a few ideas from it, but I've already put it in my "to give away" bag.

Rating:
Summary: Original and practical
Review: I recommend this book highly. As an IT manager I can testify to its practical tips for getting to the heart of a difficult situation and resolving it effectively. It's insightful, clever, witty and useful. The techniques presented can provide relief when dealing with a difficult colleague, superior or subordinate. I was particularly impressed with the methodologies for determining what the real problem is, instead of just complaining and "horribleizing." The solutions may well make you laugh, but they work.

Rating:
Summary: Powerful perspective that you can't find elsewhere
Review: Lucy Gill presents a new approach to dealing with problem people at work that is simple, fresh and extremely useful. The bottom line? Stop using the same old methods that don't work for you. If you want to see new results, you've got to employ some of the new tricks put forth here. This book will help you, whether you are stumped on dealing with a boss or employee. If you have ever felt frustrated by a bully, nerd, lightweight, arrogant or some other problem-causing co-worker, then here is your book.

This well-written book is a quick, enjoyable read that will give you more power in those moments when you feel powerless.

Rating:
Summary: Good practical approach.....I'll be ready next time
Review: Lucy Gill's "How to Work with Just About Anyone" hit close to home with me. Wish I had read this book before I gave up on a couple of projects because of people I couldn't work with. Hasn't happened to me often but when it did, I went half nuts fruitlessly trying those things that worked so well for me before with others, but now they didn't work at all. Lucy Gill is exactly on the mark, the harder I tried the worse things got.............the circular dance, she calls it. The book is too late for those particular projects but next time I'll be armed and ready. The first step of getting the problem clear with the "who is doing what to whom and how it is a problem" approach will not be forgotten. I'm half hoping I do get stuck in one of Ms Gill's feedback dance loops with someone again soon, just to try out her "doing the opposite" gambit.

One other thing, this book definitely should be read before your kids reach their teenage years.

Rating:
Summary: Original and practical
Review: Lucy Gill's realistic strategies add a significant number of new tools to the communication toolkit. The problem-solutions presentation is like mental aikido: you can see how to use the situation to help correct the situation.

I'm a project management consultant and coach for Internet startups. My clients can usually handle the technical problems; it's the people that challenge them, especially in hectic "instant company, instant culture" environments.

Lucy Gill's examples really tap an individual's "response-ability" to change their role in a situation and create solutions. I give my clients a copy of the book to reinforce our discussions - so they can take with them answers to the question "What do I say when I get back to my office?"

Rating:
Summary: Practical, down-to-earth solutions.
Review: This is a must-have book for workers, managers, coaches and anyone who interacts with "challenging" people in their life. Ms. Gill gives lots of examples, and I especially appreciated the examples in the practice portions of the book. In other books, you are often asked to apply the concepts to your own situation without enough examples of how to make the application. This book constantly reinforces the process with real examples that we can all relate to. Ms. Gill gives practical suggestions that are straightforward to apply in a variety of situations. I tried one of the techniques with one of my clients and it was totally successful. Easy to read, real-world based and it works!