The New Jewish Wedding, Revised

Rating:
Summary: An invaluable resource for couples planning a Jewish wedding
Review: Many of my new invitation or "ketuba" clients walk in my door with Anita Diamant's "The New Jewish Wedding" in hand, with page markers sticking out and underlined text throughout. If they don't, I pull out my copy to show them why they need this book to prepare for their wedding. Just as my clients know they need a "ketuba," yet don't necessarily know anything about the meaning, history and purpose of this marriage contract, they also don't know about many of the other Jewish wedding customs. This is totally understandable, for they have never needed to know until now.

The richness and meaning of Jewish wedding customs and rituals is enhanced immeasurably when couples understand why they are included in their celebration and ceremony -- and not just because "it's tradition!" Once they read "The New Jewish Wedding," couples have a much better understanding of the historical perspective of the rituals, helping in decision making about which rituals to include and what form they should take. They also have nuts and bolts information about everything from how to choose a rabbi, caterer, musicians, and location to seeking a personalized and artistic Jewish invitation and "ketuba." The dilemmas of mixed marriages and gay/lesbian ceremonies are handled with sensitivity, designed to help couples and their families approach complex issues.

Poignant stories share how previously married couples enhanced various rituals to personalize them. The detailed descriptions of the parts of the ceremony help couples know what to expect and to be more comfortable with the Jewish wedding tradition. Suggested readings and blessings provide those who want to give their ceremony their own personal twist with ideas for adding to the core elements. Anita clearly did her homework and interviewed many couples in order to provide a wide variety of possibilities to consider when planning a wedding.

My "ketuba" clients have all found "The New Jewish Wedding" to be extremely helpful in planning their special day and beyond, ever since the first edition came out in 1985. It is nice to know that times have changed sufficiently so the second edition could include some of the important information about sensitive issues that could not be addressed in the first edition.

Rating:
Summary: An invaluable resource for couples planning a Jewish wedding
Review: Many of my new invitation or "ketuba" clients walk in my door with Anita Diamant's "The New Jewish Wedding" in hand, with page markers sticking out and underlined text throughout. If they don't, I pull out my copy to show them why they need this book to prepare for their wedding. Just as my clients know they need a "ketuba," yet don't necessarily know anything about the meaning, history and purpose of this marriage contract, they also don't know about many of the other Jewish wedding customs. This is totally understandable, for they have never needed to know until now.

The richness and meaning of Jewish wedding customs and rituals is enhanced immeasurably when couples understand why they are included in their celebration and ceremony -- and not just because "it's tradition!" Once they read "The New Jewish Wedding," couples have a much better understanding of the historical perspective of the rituals, helping in decision making about which rituals to include and what form they should take. They also have nuts and bolts information about everything from how to choose a rabbi, caterer, musicians, and location to seeking a personalized and artistic Jewish invitation and "ketuba." The dilemmas of mixed marriages and gay/lesbian ceremonies are handled with sensitivity, designed to help couples and their families approach complex issues.

Poignant stories share how previously married couples enhanced various rituals to personalize them. The detailed descriptions of the parts of the ceremony help couples know what to expect and to be more comfortable with the Jewish wedding tradition. Suggested readings and blessings provide those who want to give their ceremony their own personal twist with ideas for adding to the core elements. Anita clearly did her homework and interviewed many couples in order to provide a wide variety of possibilities to consider when planning a wedding.

My "ketuba" clients have all found "The New Jewish Wedding" to be extremely helpful in planning their special day and beyond, ever since the first edition came out in 1985. It is nice to know that times have changed sufficiently so the second edition could include some of the important information about sensitive issues that could not be addressed in the first edition.

Rating:
Summary: An invaluable resource for couples planning a Jewish wedding
Review: Many of my new invitation or "ketuba" clients walk in my door with Anita Diamant's "The New Jewish Wedding" in hand, with page markers sticking out and underlined text throughout. If they don't, I pull out my copy to show them why they need this book to prepare for their wedding. Just as my clients know they need a "ketuba," yet don't necessarily know anything about the meaning, history and purpose of this marriage contract, they also don't know about many of the other Jewish wedding customs. This is totally understandable, for they have never needed to know until now.

The richness and meaning of Jewish wedding customs and rituals is enhanced immeasurably when couples understand why they are included in their celebration and ceremony -- and not just because "it's tradition!" Once they read "The New Jewish Wedding," couples have a much better understanding of the historical perspective of the rituals, helping in decision making about which rituals to include and what form they should take. They also have nuts and bolts information about everything from how to choose a rabbi, caterer, musicians, and location to seeking a personalized and artistic Jewish invitation and "ketuba." The dilemmas of mixed marriages and gay/lesbian ceremonies are handled with sensitivity, designed to help couples and their families approach complex issues.

Poignant stories share how previously married couples enhanced various rituals to personalize them. The detailed descriptions of the parts of the ceremony help couples know what to expect and to be more comfortable with the Jewish wedding tradition. Suggested readings and blessings provide those who want to give their ceremony their own personal twist with ideas for adding to the core elements. Anita clearly did her homework and interviewed many couples in order to provide a wide variety of possibilities to consider when planning a wedding.

My "ketuba" clients have all found "The New Jewish Wedding" to be extremely helpful in planning their special day and beyond, ever since the first edition came out in 1985. It is nice to know that times have changed sufficiently so the second edition could include some of the important information about sensitive issues that could not be addressed in the first edition.

Rating:
Summary: Required reading for the Parents, too.
Review: My daughter lives and will be married 600 miles away, so when she told me that the rabbi wanted her and her fiance to read this book, I bought it, too. It has been a great help in planning this wedding. We had already read a number of general wedding books. Even though we already knew the general basic traditions and laws of Jewish weddings, we needed a resource for all the options and creative ideas. We found it in this book. Almost every phone call (often several a week) has a discussion of some element of the wedding and what Anita Diamant says. I not only recommend this book to brides and grooms, but it should be required reading for their parents as well.

I was especially gratified with the inclusion of information related to including non-Jewish family, as my husband is a convert to Judaism. Other Jewish resources, I have read only deal with problems in an interfaith marriage. The book was also helpful in equalizing the differences in Jewish knowledge of my daughter and her fiance.

Rating:
Summary: Required reading for the Parents, too.
Review: My daughter lives and will be married 600 miles away, so when she told me that the rabbi wanted her and her fiance to read this book, I bought it, too. It has been a great help in planning this wedding. We had already read a number of general wedding books. Even though we already knew the general basic traditions and laws of Jewish weddings, we needed a resource for all the options and creative ideas. We found it in this book. Almost every phone call (often several a week) has a discussion of some element of the wedding and what Anita Diamant says. I not only recommend this book to brides and grooms, but it should be required reading for their parents as well.

I was especially gratified with the inclusion of information related to including non-Jewish family, as my husband is a convert to Judaism. Other Jewish resources, I have read only deal with problems in an interfaith marriage. The book was also helpful in equalizing the differences in Jewish knowledge of my daughter and her fiance.

Rating:
Summary: This is indeed THE book to get
Review: My fiance and I were looking for a book to explain Jewish wedding laws and customs. We bought a few different books, and I think this was by far the best.

I particularly liked its clarity and organization. While other books bombard you with random Hebrew and Yiddish terms (sometimes translating them into English and leaving out the original language), this book takes time to explain them. It distinguishes which Jewish wedding practices are law and which are custom. It talks about both Ashkenazi and Sephardi traditions and makes it fairly clear which traditions are specific to one ethnicity and which are more universal. It addresses a number of mainstream American wedding practices (such as rehearsal dinners) that are NOT typically a part of Jewish weddings. And it educates in a way that makes me feel like I have a grip on the information, rather than throwing out pieces of information that make me go "Huh? What's up with that?"

There is a reason rabbis recommend this book. If you have any interest in learning about Jewish weddings, especially if you want to incorporate Yiddishkeit into your own wedding, this is the book to get.

Rating:
Summary: This is indeed THE book to get
Review: My fiance and I were looking for a book to explain Jewish wedding laws and customs. We bought a few different books, and I think this was by far the best.

I particularly liked its clarity and organization. While other books bombard you with random Hebrew and Yiddish terms (sometimes translating them into English and leaving out the original language), this book takes time to explain them. It distinguishes which Jewish wedding practices are law and which are custom. It talks about both Ashkenazi and Sephardi traditions and makes it fairly clear which traditions are specific to one ethnicity and which are more universal. It addresses a number of mainstream American wedding practices (such as rehearsal dinners) that are NOT typically a part of Jewish weddings. And it educates in a way that makes me feel like I have a grip on the information, rather than throwing out pieces of information that make me go "Huh? What's up with that?"

There is a reason rabbis recommend this book. If you have any interest in learning about Jewish weddings, especially if you want to incorporate Yiddishkeit into your own wedding, this is the book to get.

Rating:
Summary: intermarriage slighted
Review: Nice job, in general, and very informative, but the very brief section on intermarriage told me only what I was going to miss out on (and left me feeling quite depressed). The tribal issues are difficult enough to deal with when you're getting married. Perhaps it might help to see more on how to have a posivite intermarriage experience, especially when you are planning an (ostensibly) Jewish wedding and to have a Jewish family, even though your spouse is not Jewish.

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Summary: It helped us have the Jewish wedding of our dreams
Review: Note: I heard that a revised edition is coming soon. However I wouldn't wait. If the new addition comes out between now and your wedding, well then you can have 2 great books! (The rest of us only had the one!)

I bought this book for my groom-to-be, and he LOVED it. He became a full partner in planning our wedding -- and he's someone who claimed to hate weddings (before ours). That alone is priceless!

Next I read it. Even though I've always been Jewish, I've only recently began to participate and study. I found it helpful in learning what's what. It gave me confidence to embrace and create an authentic Jewish wedding. Otherwise, I'm afraid I would have gone through the motions.

Anita sparked our imagination of how we could have a wedding steeped in tradition and still highly personal. It truly grounded us and liberated us. Our Jewish and non-Jewish friends LOVED our wedding. More importantly, WE LOVED OUR WEDDING. Thanks Anita.

PS We just bought "How to be a Jewish Parent" I guess that makes us groupies. I figure I can't have too much confidence and guidance when it comes to being a Jewish parent (maybe next year?!)

Rating:
Summary: This is the Jewish wedding book you should purchase.
Review: Since I am in the thick of helping to plan a Jewish wedding, I have looked at a number of the available guides to Jewish wedding planing. Bar none, this is the best. It treats weddings not only as the social events they invariably are, but also as the spiritual event we all want them to be. This is a tall order considering that the adjective "Jewish" applies to Hassidic Jews and egalitarian Reform Jews both. Anita Diamant is successful at pointing out the way one can make their wedding feel more "Jewish," no matter what the level of observance. She details the ceremony and the significance of all of its elements, but does not advocate one set of values or beliefs in lieu of another. Using real examples, she is able to illustrate that you can utilize the rich set of Jewish wedding traditions to make your wedding uniquely yours, and distinctly Jewish - as you define it for yourselves.

This book seems to have been written for Conservative and Reform Jews who may not be aware of all of the elements of a Jewish wedding. However, even if you are more traditional in your beliefs, you might appreciate this book as a resource for ideas.

Another, unrelated, point - Anita Diamant speaks not only to the bride, but also to the groom. She does not take us for granted, men. The only drawback of this book - and this is a minor point - is that it was written fifteen years ago, making some of the resources out of date. Do not let that stop you from purchasing the book - most of the information it contains is timeless.

Not only did my sister-in-law give us a copy when we announced our engagement, but our rabbi made it compulsory reading. My love and I are both grateful that they did. If you only buy one book, this should be the one. Mazel Tov.