Rating: 
Summary: Excellent Book on Helping Kids Want to Self-Actualize
Review: As a father and a coach, I have always been concerned whether ot not I am pushing my kids the correct way in order to reach their potential. This book really sheds light on the fallacies of unconditional love, self-esteem at all costs and the other myths that have been propogated as a backlash to the rigidity of the 1950's. The biggest challenge to pushing kids to maximize their potential is knowing where to "draw the line" with yourself. Dr. Taylor does an excellent job at showing you where to draw that line. He also makes an excellent point that in order to propel your kids in the right direction, you yourself need to be going in the right direction. If you are a head case, you can reasonably expect your kid to be a head case. Thank you Dr. Taylor.
Rating:
Summary: Excellent Book on Helping Kids Want to Self-Actualize
Review: As a father and a coach, I have always been concerned whether ot not I am pushing my kids the correct way in order to reach their potential. This book really sheds light on the fallacies of unconditional love, self-esteem at all costs and the other myths that have been propogated as a backlash to the rigidity of the 1950's. The biggest challenge to pushing kids to maximize their potential is knowing where to "draw the line" with yourself. Dr. Taylor does an excellent job at showing you where to draw that line. He also makes an excellent point that in order to propel your kids in the right direction, you yourself need to be going in the right direction. If you are a head case, you can reasonably expect your kid to be a head case. Thank you Dr. Taylor.
Rating:
Summary: A Push For This Book!
Review: As a former middle-school teacher I have worked with kids who have been pushed too hard and those who haven't been nudged enough; I wish this book had been around for their parents. Positive Pushing offers insight and advice on when to push and when to hold back, something that isn't always easy for parents to figure out. Letting a child fail is not a bad thing -- in fact, we're doing kids a favor, even though it's hard for parents to step back and watch their children not succeed. "Placating your child doesn't allow him to understand his disappointment and figure out how to put it behind him," Taylor explains.
As a mother of a kindergartner, I'm glad to have read this book and know I will come back to it through the years. I was especially satisfied to read his take on perfectionists.
I head Taylor speak on raising successful and happy children, and found him intelligent, insightful and honest. I'm very excited about his new work on media and technology and its effects on children.
Rating: 
Summary: Positively Helpful!
Review: As a parent of three (ages 2, 6, 8) who lives in an affluent suberb with many high strung, overachieving parents, this book was a refreshing push in the right direction. Although "pushing" one's children has gotten a bad rap, Dr. Taylor calls "em as he seems 'em" and lets us know that pushing children is fine, if done in the right way. Many of us push our children in negative and hurtful ways. This book explains how to push or encourage your children in a positive, non-judgmental way. Further, the book is well written and easy to read. It lays out Dr. Taylor's three pillars of successful parenting in a concise and straight forward way. I found this book to be very helpful. I will refer to it again and again as a reference.
Rating:
Summary: Positively Helpful!
Review: As a parent of three (ages 2, 6, 8) who lives in an affluent suberb with many high strung, overachieving parents, this book was a refreshing push in the right direction. Although "pushing" one's children has gotten a bad rap, Dr. Taylor calls "em as he seems 'em" and lets us know that pushing children is fine, if done in the right way. Many of us push our children in negative and hurtful ways. This book explains how to push or encourage your children in a positive, non-judgmental way. Further, the book is well written and easy to read. It lays out Dr. Taylor's three pillars of successful parenting in a concise and straight forward way. I found this book to be very helpful. I will refer to it again and again as a reference.
Rating:
Summary: Pushing Parents Positively
Review: As a psychologist who often works with parents, a parent of two school-age children, and a soccer coach, I found this book extremely helpful both personally and in my work. I would happily recommend it to parents without reservation, something I can't say about that many parenting books! It is unusually clear and well-written (something I can't say about the writing of that many psychologists!), relatively jargon-free, and organized well. The ideas are well-integrated with research findings as well as reflecting Dr. Taylor's own considerable clinical experience. His discussion of perfectionism, fear of failure, and defining of success in terms of effort and setting realistic goals were particularly useful and applicable not just to children. This book is bigger than its title in that it also addresses emotional maturity in general, and how to build and foster maturity in our children so that they can be both successful achievers and happier people. The definition of achievement in terms of one's efforts and perseverence in pursuit of personally meaningful goals could make a huge difference in the lives of many adults as well as children. I see too many adults in my practice who were crippled by low self-esteem and grandiose expectations of themselves that I can't help but appreciate this book. I was particularly struck by Dr. Taylor's discussion of the child who is objectively successful but can't appreciate his or her success; this seems a common and heartbreaking problem that does not get enough attention.
If this book has any faults, it is only that in his efforts to be clear and to hold parents accountable, Dr. Taylor does not emphasize other important influences on children's difficulties with achievement such as temperament (some children naturally push themselves harder than others, some are more focused than others, etc.), significant differences in ability, comparing themselves with peers and siblings, and the degree to which the larger school and community culture emphasize competition, etc. Sometimes our job as parents is to temper those other influences, and we can succeed or fail in that capacity as well. Some of the complexity of parent-child dynamics is lost when the emphasis is only on how parents influence their children and not on how different children elicit very different responses around achievement issues, and so present different challenges for parents. Nevertheless, this book makes a valuable contribution to a complex issue that is compelling and often confusing for most parents but is not often discussed so thoughtfully and at such length. In the end, Dr. Taylor manages to "push" (i.e. inspire, encourage, challenge) parents in a positive way to do a better job.
Rating:
Summary: Really good
Review: As someone who works with children, and who is the aunt of a 5 year old, I'm always looking for good books on how to support children to be the best they can be. This one really hits the mark. The author has a sound grasp of the subject of achievement, which he demonstrates through the use of solid references, research, and personal examples via his clinical practice. He writes in a way that is clear and easy for readers to apply to their own life. As someone who coaches floor hockey, I've already begun to use some of his techniques in supporting some of the parents who take their pushing too far. The author strikes a nice balance between encouraging parents to ensure that children take opportunities to try different things, and forcing too many activities on to children. The use of lists at the end of each chapter to summarize key concepts and ideas is really useful.I would caution readers that the author's skewering of the self esteem movement is simplistic, at best. He does seem to be moralizing here, and I found myself tuning out at times. I would also disagree with his statements on unconditional love. The problem is he is actually mislabelling 'approval' as love. Parents should love their children no matter what. Love is not a weapon to be used to ensure certain behaviour from a child. I always love my niece, which she knows. She also knows, however, that I don't always approve of her behaviour and/or choices, and what the consequences are if she crosses certain boundaries. The author sends really mixed messages, because for all his talk about the 'dangers of unconditional love', at other times he does seem to understand the need to separate one's feelings about a child's behavior and choices from one's feelings about the person as a whole. Lastly, I confess to finding some of the chapters to be a bit long. I found I took breaks from the book because it felt like overload at times. But the author uses alot of subheadings, so there are numerous logical spots to 'take a break', so this this problem wasn't as annoying as some other books with long chapters. This book has many useful ideas, and the subject is very worthwhile. Highly reccommended to all!
Rating:
Summary: A Great Message for All Parents
Review: At a time when children are under more pressure than ever to perform academically, athletically and even socially, parents may be surprised to find a book whose title seems to advocate pushing children. In fact, it's the qualifier that counts. By "positive" pushing, Dr. Taylor refers not only to the way we should encourage our children to succeed, but also to how we should measure that success. Dr. Taylor does agree that many kids today have intense demands placed upon them - for straight A's, winning the game, or getting a college scholarship. However, he says that many of these same children are being raised without boundaries or a sense of consequences (i.e.: a kid can throw a tantrum and still get a new toy). Dr. Taylor advocates turning the equation around. Kids must be raised with expectations for certain behavior and for adherence to particular values. Goals should not be established as demands from parents for certain outcomes (like good grades), but should instead come from the children, and should reflect the family's values. For example, a child who feels that her actions matter, and that hard work and perseverance are worthy ideals, will feel proud of herself for making her best effort in a particular subject. She should be praised for her effort, not for the grade. Dr. Taylor takes it one step further and asks us to examine how we define success in today's world. He contrasts those who achieve success as defined by society, and those who have successfully achieved personal goals. It is clear who Dr. Taylor feels will be happiest - which may be the truest measure of success. Indeed, this book has many more valuable lessons, and it is well worth a read.
Rating:
Summary: "Positive Parents"
Review: I have had the pleasure of listening to Dr. Taylor speak and have read his book "Positive Pushing". I am a parent and grandparent and feel that I am an experienced parent. I usually take what the experts say with a grain of salt. I was very surprised by Dr. Taylor's book. "Positive Pushing" is presented in a down to earth, friendly way. Nicely organized. Good References. Personal experiences. All add character to the book. Each chapter summary is extremely helpful. But, its the content of the book that will make you keep reading and start you thinking.
Dr. Taylor introduces to parents the concept that "pushing" your child can be successful and painless, (well, relatively painless). His ideas have a common sense foundation. "Use boundaries." Set goals not expectations." My favorite, "be a parent, not a friend." The book almost is a "how to be a parents" guide, because you really must know who you are, your limitations and your strengths before you can be successful as a parent. Dr. Taylor talks not only to how to help your child in a positive way, but how to help yourself as a parent.
A very good read. I would recommend it to any parent. Raising you child takes dedication, understanding and love all directed "positively" to the child. Dr. Taylor's book will give you some new insights into "positive pushing". I also highly recomend attending one of Dr. Taylor's seminar if you have the oppourtunity. He speaks as he writes with humor and common sense. Dr. Taylor's books are worth a look at.
Rating:
Summary: Dr. Taylor gets it re: raising successful children.
Review: I read a fair amount of parenting books and, sad to say, many of them are little more than either "psycho-babble" or books on how to manipulate your child. Positive Pushing is a wonderfully balanced look at this little discussed aspect of childhood; raising your children to be successful. Dr. Taylor does a very thorough job of defining what true success is. He also does a very thorough job of delineating what the parental responsibilities are. I love the way he makes clear (throughout the book)how the parents themselves need to engage in defining their own values as well as resolving their own issues. This "parenting from the inside out" approach ensures that the parent does not work out his/her unresolved parental issues through their child, which, sadly, describes many, many parents. One of the main themes that underpines his work is "what is in the best interests of the child." If we, as a society, had our child(ren)'s best interest in the forefront of our thinking, how different our world would look! Parents would do well to read this book together, especially as their children approach school age. Yet, this book can be read and appreciated by parents who have children in the later grades. Caution: This is not a book one can just breeze through and "get." Dr. Taylor has buttressed his contention that children need to be positively pushed with a plethora of research, some longitudinal. He's done is homework, obviously, and the net result is this masterpiece that is destined to be an all-time classic in parenting literature. A book I will continue to consult, both as a parent and as a (one day) counselor. As solid a book as you will ever read on child rearing.
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