The Other Victim: How Caregivers Survive a Loved One's Chronic Illness

Rating:
Summary: It's Depressing, But True, And Knowledge Is Power
Review: I found this book by happenstance. Having lived as the well spouse of an MS patient for the last twelve years, I was searching for something for me. There are millions of books out there addressing the needs of the chronically ill, but very few readings tackle the challenges of the well people who deal with them.

The book was more of a validation for me than new information. That validation, however, must have been sorely needed, as I finished reading it in a couple of hours. Whatever stage you are at in dealing with chronic illness, there is a need to share information such as the stories in this book. Take hold, learn, and know that you are not alone.

The web search that led me to this book also led me to the National Well Spouse Foundation, which has a local chapter in my area. I will attend my first meeting next month. Unfortunately, the MS Society here does not have a support group for care givers.

Although I rated the book with five stars, I don't really love it. How can anyone love the intimacies of chronic illness? However, the writing is poignant, honest, and necessary -- not only for people facing these situations, but also for the people around them who don't.

My story to add: In addition to dealing with a husband with MS who slipped dramatically in the last year, I also have a teenage son with ADHD, and a daughter who's, well, normal? We have no family in this part of the country and I've had to learn to be very assertive and self-reliant. I could be one of the characters in this book. Maybe, some day, I will be.