An Owner's Guide to Parenting Teenagers: A Step-By-Step, Solution-Focused Approach to Raising Adolescents Without Losing Your Mind

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Summary: A practical approach to help parents stay calm in hard times
Review: As a therapist who works with very difficult adolescents, I believe this book provides a wealth of information on helping parents remain calm and in control when their teenagers are losing it. It is very common for teens to attempt power and control struggles with their parents. Most parents respond inappropriately by losing control of their own emotions when reacting to their adolescent's need to test the limits. With the controversy that surrounds abuse issues today, parents are often at a loss of what actions they can take that are legal and appropriate forms of consequences for their child when the child is out of control. This book offers wonderful ways for parents to respond. When these techniques are done with calmness and emotional control as the book suggests, parents can respond in ways that are not harmful to the child yet remind him or her of their boundaries within the family system. As the authors boldly proclaim, it is essential for parents to change the way their family system functions when it is obvious that the current methods are not working. It is true that oppositional human beings will not change their resistant behavior until they are uncomfortable with the consequences of that behavior. This is the goal the parent is seeking: to enforce uncomfortable consequences that are NOT harmful or abusive in order to produce a motivation for change in the child. When children are responding with extreme opposition to any form of appropriate boundaries or discipline, they do not respond to reason for they are only seeking one thing: power and control over their circumstances to get what they want. This sounds so much like the manipulative behavior of the terrible twos and I believe it is an extension of the same drive for independence that has gone out of control. It is not safe to let children rule their own lives in this manner for they are not wise enough to resist the urges and impulses within their minds and bodies. They end up on drugs, stealing, prostituting themselves, or worse, they may end up dead. Parents must realize their responsibility to protect their children and do whatever it takes to provide safe and reasonable consequences that will motivate their child to change the negative behavior. All forms of discipline should be done in a loving manner. Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to calmly enforce uncomfortable consequences on a consistent basis that will provide some form of motivation for change. Wonderful advise for parents! Superb! Excellent job ladies! Keep up the good work!!!

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Summary: Helped make my home a plesant place to be once again.
Review: Our home has become a place of constant nagging and resentment, moans and groans, and dirty looks. This books is helping me to not get angry at my teenagers, yet still get their behavior back on track. It is a VERY practical book that is not bogged down in theory. It has been a great inspiration to me and it makes me eagar to face another day with my teen.

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Summary: This book is not an effective guide to teenagers.
Review: This book not only will not help you with your teenager, it could very well make your life a living hell. It talks a lot about how to play mind games with them and talks nothing about the trust building and responsibility training that is necessary to work with any child. Example: If your child chooses not to take a shower or put on deoderant, this book suggests dousing them with the grossest smelling perfume that you can find. This not only shows complete disrespect for your child but it teaches the NOTHING except cruelty. If you need help a better book would be - "Uncommen Sense." It is an excellent book and gives you great advice.