Intimate Violence

Rating:
Summary: Crucial piece of understanding violence in relationships
Review: Admirably, Scalia has done something extremely difficult. He has clearly and comprehensively explained how violence can develop and exist in intimate relationships with deep compassion for the abuser, but without justifying the violence.

As someone who has worked with abused women for over a decade through support groups and in a therapeutic role my interest in understanding the psychology of someone who abuses was steadily increasing. Joseph Scalia's thought-provoking Intimate Violence turned out to be highly instrumental in helping me to address that previously missing piece of my understanding of violent relationships. The questions he addresses about the dynamics of abuse from the abuser's perspective echoed so many of my own questions over the years about how violence is perpetrated against someone who is, in most cases, loved by the abuser. Scalia clarifies the complicated concept of early psychological wounding with its resulting coping mechanisms that the wounded develop to defend against further vulnerability for experiencing harm (which in some cases do result in violence.)

As a mental health provider I particularly appreciate his courage in admitting and addressing the therapist's natural abhorrence to working with clients who display such violent behaviors and how that attitude towards the abuser can result in ineffective, if not harmful, treatment. His ideas for developing a treatment approach that is both compassionate and effective seem to be right on the mark. I recommend this book to all mental health providers who work with violent clients.