For Better or For Worse: A Blessing or A Curse

Rating:
Summary: A MUST HAVE FOR EVERY WOMAN!!!!!!!!!
Review: I was brought up in an abusive home and unfortunately the man I had married to "escape" the abuse turned out to be 100 times worse then my parents ever could. Back when I went throught it there was no "Domestic Abuse Council" and women were pretty much still considered "property of their husbands" in the eyes of the law. Every minute a woman is being abused by her "significant other" but every two miutes a woman is being killed! Where does it stop and when does society stop turning a blind eye to this major problem? The more people (man or woman) who read this book and others like it the greater the effect on the statistics will be and hopefully we will finally put an end to the violence.

Rating:
Summary: A MUST HAVE FOR EVERY WOMAN!!!!!!!!!
Review: I was brought up in an abusive home and unfortunately the man I had married to "escape" the abuse turned out to be 100 times worse then my parents ever could. Back when I went throught it there was no "Domestic Abuse Council" and women were pretty much still considered "property of their husbands" in the eyes of the law. Every minute a woman is being abused by her "significant other" but every two miutes a woman is being killed! Where does it stop and when does society stop turning a blind eye to this major problem? The more people (man or woman) who read this book and others like it the greater the effect on the statistics will be and hopefully we will finally put an end to the violence.

Rating:
Summary: A MUST HAVE FOR EVERY WOMAN!!!!!!!!!
Review: I was brought up in an abusive home and unfortunately the man I had married to "escape" the abuse turned out to be 100 times worse then my parents ever could. Back when I went throught it there was no "Domestic Abuse Council" and women were pretty much still considered "property of their husbands" in the eyes of the law. Every minute a woman is being abused by her "significant other" but every two miutes a woman is being killed! Where does it stop and when does society stop turning a blind eye to this major problem? The more people (man or woman) who read this book and others like it the greater the effect on the statistics will be and hopefully we will finally put an end to the violence.

Rating:
Summary: Healing, at last.
Review: This book is an excellent resource to tackle a subject not freely discussed in the Christian environment. The subject matter and step by step guidelines are easy to understand and direct. The scriptural references counteract the myths that have been used for years to keep the cycle of abuse going in a family (i.e., the woman is to submit to the husband, etc.). The author addresses the victim, the abuser, the church, the counselor/support team, the children, the law and God's directives to us. A checklist for identifying the signs of abuse, a guideline for what steps to take and how to begin the healing process, both for the victim as well as the abuser are also included. The poetry therapy is a MUST READ!! Identifying the beginnings of the cycle of abuse, for both the victim (what went wrong?) and the abuser (why do I abuse?) are keys to recovery and are laid out in an easy to understand way. Discerning God's true desire for us through scripture stimulates the healing process. This book also gives direction to the church as to their role when abuse is identified and how to respond to help break the cycle. This is an important tool for use in any Christian recovery/support/teaching group.

Rating:
Summary: Healing, at last.
Review: This book is an excellent resource to tackle a subject not freely discussed in the Christian environment. The subject matter and step by step guidelines are easy to understand and direct. The scriptural references counteract the myths that have been used for years to keep the cycle of abuse going in a family (i.e., the woman is to submit to the husband, etc.). The author addresses the victim, the abuser, the church, the counselor/support team, the children, the law and God's directives to us. A checklist for identifying the signs of abuse, a guideline for what steps to take and how to begin the healing process, both for the victim as well as the abuser are also included. The poetry therapy is a MUST READ!! Identifying the beginnings of the cycle of abuse, for both the victim (what went wrong?) and the abuser (why do I abuse?) are keys to recovery and are laid out in an easy to understand way. Discerning God's true desire for us through scripture stimulates the healing process. This book also gives direction to the church as to their role when abuse is identified and how to respond to help break the cycle. This is an important tool for use in any Christian recovery/support/teaching group.

Rating:
Summary: Complete and Helpful
Review: Yes, I'll admit the title fooled me. When I read the name "For Better or For Worse: A Blessing or a Curse" I thought Ms. Martin's would discuss whether the notion of "until death" is still applicable to modern marriages. Instead, her book deals with helping people who hold this belief but are in abusive relationships. It does not condemn the belief or those who hold it.

The book is a RESOURCE GUIDE to dealing with domestic violence in Christian families. And, believe me, anyone can use it.

I like how she carefully outlines exactly what constitutes abuse and abusive behavior. She not only lets the VICTIMS know who they are, what they can do and where they can go for help but does the same for the ABUSERS.

If you are an abused woman or teen you might go to your church or pastor for help. But what do you do if the abuser is the pastor and you are his wife/child/victim? That's where this book comes in. It includes lists that profile victims, abusers, typical behaviors, habits, histories, statistics, etc. It even lists actual agencies in the State where you live (USA) so you can get real and immediate help. She outlines what is acceptable or normal behavior and what is not. Victims often think that what they are experiencing is normal. Abusers sometimes think they are well within their rights.

Helpful were the true stories in the book about Christian couples whose marriages survived and were healed from physical, sexual and verbal abuse as well as stories of relationships that did not make it. These stories may help the reader decide what is workable and what's not but Ms. Martin never makes that decision for you.

I was touched by the fact that while she writes as a professional Ms. Martin included prayers, poems, proverbs and Bible verses for healing. The book can be used by people of any religion and not only Christian faiths. Men and women who come from religious backgrounds often believe that divorce is not an option. The victims (usually women) believe they cannot break their vows even if their lives are seriously at risk.

In her book Ms. Martin brings hope for those victims who want help and for abusers who recognise their abusiveness and want to change. And she non-judgmentally shows the church-world that abuse REALLY exists in some of its families (even in the pulpit) but that homes can be saved even when the abuser is a pastor, elder, deacon or just a regular church member. Ms. Martin admits, however, it is not possible to save all marriages. Some women have had to run for their lives - LITERALLY. Ms. Martin is a licensed counsellor, social worker and former victim and she has usefully drawn on her experiences to write this book.

Any church member, counsellor, social worker, friend or relative can use this book to find safe, peaceful, Godly ways and resources to help both victims and abusers. Victims and abusers even can use it to help themselves TO SOME EXTENT but they may still need to get more help.

"For Better or For Worse" was obviously written by someone who cares, who wants to save lives, families and marriages, while keeping them whole(where possible) for better and NOT for worse. Thank you, Ms. Martin, for a very useful book.

Rating:
Summary: Complete and Helpful
Review: Yes, I'll admit the title fooled me. When I read the name "For Better or For Worse: A Blessing or a Curse" I thought Ms. Martin's would discuss whether the notion of "until death" is still applicable to modern marriages. Instead, her book deals with helping people who hold this belief but are in abusive relationships. It does not condemn the belief or those who hold it.

The book is a RESOURCE GUIDE to dealing with domestic violence in Christian families. And, believe me, anyone can use it.

I like how she carefully outlines exactly what constitutes abuse and abusive behavior. She not only lets the VICTIMS know who they are, what they can do and where they can go for help but does the same for the ABUSERS.

If you are an abused woman or teen you might go to your church or pastor for help. But what do you do if the abuser is the pastor and you are his wife/child/victim? That's where this book comes in. It includes lists that profile victims, abusers, typical behaviors, habits, histories, statistics, etc. It even lists actual agencies in the State where you live (USA) so you can get real and immediate help. She outlines what is acceptable or normal behavior and what is not. Victims often think that what they are experiencing is normal. Abusers sometimes think they are well within their rights.

Helpful were the true stories in the book about Christian couples whose marriages survived and were healed from physical, sexual and verbal abuse as well as stories of relationships that did not make it. These stories may help the reader decide what is workable and what's not but Ms. Martin never makes that decision for you.

I was touched by the fact that while she writes as a professional Ms. Martin included prayers, poems, proverbs and Bible verses for healing. The book can be used by people of any religion and not only Christian faiths. Men and women who come from religious backgrounds often believe that divorce is not an option. The victims (usually women) believe they cannot break their vows even if their lives are seriously at risk.

In her book Ms. Martin brings hope for those victims who want help and for abusers who recognise their abusiveness and want to change. And she non-judgmentally shows the church-world that abuse REALLY exists in some of its families (even in the pulpit) but that homes can be saved even when the abuser is a pastor, elder, deacon or just a regular church member. Ms. Martin admits, however, it is not possible to save all marriages. Some women have had to run for their lives - LITERALLY. Ms. Martin is a licensed counsellor, social worker and former victim and she has usefully drawn on her experiences to write this book.

Any church member, counsellor, social worker, friend or relative can use this book to find safe, peaceful, Godly ways and resources to help both victims and abusers. Victims and abusers even can use it to help themselves TO SOME EXTENT but they may still need to get more help.

"For Better or For Worse" was obviously written by someone who cares, who wants to save lives, families and marriages, while keeping them whole(where possible) for better and NOT for worse. Thank you, Ms. Martin, for a very useful book.