Rating: 
Summary: Moms--wondering why you're doing it all? read this.
Review: This is an excellent, pleasureable book by a sociologist/ mom who has taken on the task of trying to find the holy grail of truly shared parenting. The author is clearly following in the path blazed by The Second Shift, and examines what it means to be a co-parent by looking at case studies. These case studies are interesting peeks at families and how they function or don't.The detail is excellent. Wonderfully, she includes household management as part of what it means to be a co-parent. So housework is a big part of this story. My only complaint about this book is that it seemed to be more about housework than about actual parenting. There is very little info on typical parenting issues --it's really about the spouses and their relationship. The funny part is her catalog of male excuses for not pitching in--the Harvard lawyer who claims incompetence when it comes to laundry or dressing a five-year old. The excuse of lower standards, the brick wall, etc. All very familiar. Women also have excuses. Her gentle jibes will make you think twice about jumping in to clean something up because the man of the house doesn't do it "good enough." The scary part is how rare co-parenting is and how incredibly hard it is to achieve. But she does offer some good ideas on how to start thinking about it practically. This book will depress you if you think you've actually made a choice being an SAH mom because, maybe, you haven't really. She really puts the squeeze on the kind of thinking women do in these situations. You may not like this. It's a valuable read if you want to find ways to enhance cooperation in your family. It's valuable, too, if you want to enahnce the presence of each parent in your child's life, and offer better role models. This is not a how to. It isn't a self-help thing. This is a book that intelligently looks at some deepy feminist issues in a friendly and apporachable way and then holds up a mirror to your own family and asks you to take a good look --for yourself, for you spouse, and for you children.
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