Rating: 
Summary: TIme-tested...for how long?
Review: About 15 years worth, maybe? That's about how long one of the authors, Ellen Fein, stayed married to her husband. Now ehe's divorcing him and yet she's co-author of this book. Hmmm...makes one wonder just how "time-tested" these secrets are...and by whom....and how well they work on certain marriages. Call me a cynic if you want but I do think a book lacks credibility if one of the authors is no longer in a long-term (and lasting) marriage herself. And yes, I read the books. And yes, I hated it - even BEFORE I heard of the divorce. Let's just say I'm not surprised. The rules? Hogwash!
Rating: 
Summary: A More Positive Approach
Review: After skeptically reading the Rules 1, and trying them out just for fun, I found that they worked like a charm for me. They were so effective that I was dating and married to my dear husband within a little over a year. After three happy years together, I decided to "brush up" on the rules just to add a little something to our marriage, which is when I found this version of The Rules. Now we are celebrating our fourth anniversary together--quite happily, I might add--and I think the rules they suggest really helped us. I think most of the rules are good and helpful (even if you don't personally agree with them--they really do work!), but I think some of their advice is counter-productive to their own philosophy (e.g., looking at porn together). If you are a woman who can be open-minded enough to try an "old fashioned" approach, it's all for your benefit! After one day of trying the rules, my husband was offering himself to make dinner, clean-up, babysit for our daughter, give me a foot massage, and have AMAZING SEX with me!! What they suggest works for us. I definitely DON'T feel oppressed. I feel empowered, loved, and appreciated unconditionally. It works like the Golden Rule that way. When you are sweet and loving toward your dear husband, he (unless he's a sociopath or a narcissist) will feel loved and appreciated and want to return the love to you. I am speaking from personal experience. But you decide for yourself. How's your way working for you?
Rating: 
Summary: Wait a Minute
Review: Congratulations Ellen. You now join the ranks of John Gray, Barbara DeAngelis, Laura Schlessinger and other DIVORCED "experts" telling us how to have great marriages.I'd prefer to recommend material written by men and women who are very happily married like Gary Smalley, Michael Webb, John Trent and Gary Chapman. But, let's review the book. It actually isn't bad. I'd say 3/4 of the ideas are actually good. A couple of your suggestions are probably what sent you to divorce court. Read this book only if you read several other marriage books so you can make up your own mind as to what makes sense and what doesn't. A few suggestions of other books to read: The Five Languages of Love, The Romantic's Guide, The Language of Love
Rating: 
Summary: Oh, come on...
Review: From one point of view, guys should be foisting this on every woman in sight. Except that the women in our worlds would then be so much less interesting and fun to be with. Along with being irritating this book left me feeling insulted. If men are so easily manipulable then how could you ever respect a guy who falls for the Rules in the first place? Try these instead: Rule #1: You don't need a man to make you happy. Rule #2: If you've got this far, you haven't finished learning Rule #1. Go back and start again. There must be better ways to build respect for yourself and the guys around you. A waste of time and money. And no mention that the authors have both divorced since writing this.
Rating:
Summary: Rules Made My Marriage (and Divorce) Happier!
Review: I am a tried and true Rules Wife! My husband and I were married six months ago and we just love The Rules. We've followed just about every one of them. I've definitely 'lowered my expectations' in our first year of marriage (#5). And we are a team, so I always force myself to go wherever he wants and always consult him on everything from career and health issues to the hemline of my dress (#6). I let my husband win every argument (unless it's very important to me, which it never is because my feelings don't matter as much as his) (#9). I've accepted that his health, his work, and the lipstick stains on his collar are none of my business (#10). I always do things I don't want to do, like watch pornography and attending old fraternity reunions (#23). We also have sex whenever he wants too! (#29) I've kept up my appearance (#3), but I haven't changed or tried TOO hard! (#38). Unfortunately, after all my hard work, and even though it's 'easier to stay married than get married' (#36), my husband and I have had some problems so we will be 'divorcing with dignity' (#41). After all, I 'don't think marriage counseling is the answer' (#39). But, the good news is, I'll be jumping back out into the dating pool right away (#42), right after I dust off my copy of 'The Rules for Dating' that helped me snag my stud in the first place! PS - This book is the worst! I am HAPPILY married for six months and neither of us follow any of these rules because we believe that being open, loving each other and COMMUNICATING are the keys a successful marriage not lies and deceit (as Ellen Fein found out when she filed for divorce).
Rating:
Summary: buyer beware
Review: I don't own this book but just by looking at the table of contents this book is no good. I didn't even need to go beyond the table of contents to know this book is a fraud. Look especially at Rules #9,13,23,25,26,31,32,33,36, and rule 39 is the kicker "Don't think Marriage Counseling is the Answer". This book is so backwards, it's suggesting that women should be people pleasing with no mind of their own. I happen to own The Rules book, I bought it for a while, but when I tried to do the Rules it made things frustrating. You want someone who will love you for the real you, not because you know how to play the game.
Rating:
Summary: Nothing but junk.
Review: I followed the book on the rules ofmarriage, it did nothing but worsen my condition of being single and hating it. My friends used it that were married and ended up getting a divorce when they were done reading it. DO NOT READ THIS GARBAGE!!!
Rating:
Summary: Many good rules worth following!
Review: I found this book to be pretty basic, common sense. It advises women to keep their own interests, not compare their husbands to others, keep up your looks, don't try to do it all, have a date night, don't scream - etc. I wouldn't say I agree with ALL of it, and you can't write a set of rules that will work for every marraige, but it basically advises that you let go of the petty stuff and be supportive rather than nagging. It is an easy, quick read and there is bit of advice in it that will surely help everyone.
Rating: 
Summary: I Love the Rules
Review: I HAVE TO SAY.....I LOVE THE RULES. I KNOW THAT EVERYONE ELSE DOESN'T LIKE TO ADMIT IT...BUT I WILL FOR MYSELF AND FOR MY FRIENDS. I AM MARRIED AND ALWAYS LIKED THE RULES BUT THIS MARRIAGE BOOK HAS ABSOLUTELY BLOWN ME AWAY. I HAVE A WONDERFUL HUSBAND...BUT SOMETIMES HE CAN BE DIFFICULT. NOW I HAVE LEARNED THAT IF I LET HIM WIN, ACT AS IF WE ARE A TEAM, SAY WHAT I MEAN BUT NOT SAY IT MEANLY....I FEEL AS IF THIS BOOK GIVES ME SUPPORT FOR WHAT I SHOULD DO AND DON'T ALWAYS WANT TO DO. I HAVE TRIED IT THIS WHOLE WEEK AND HAVE ALREADY HAD UNBELIABLE RESULTS. THIS BOOK MAKES ME FEEL GREAT. MY FRIEND RECOMMENDED IT TO ME AND I THANK HER , AND ELLEN AND SHERRIE. AND ELLEN, YOU GO GIRL..... I HOPE YOU GET BACK WITH YOUR HUBBY!
Rating:
Summary: DIVORCED women trying to make money off of you...
Review: I picked up this book for a friend of mine who is getting married. Luckily I sat down in the store's cafe to look it over before actually buying it. It's a silly and condesending book with rules like "Let him win" to have a successful marriage. I have been happily married for over 25 years, and while I can't say what would work for you - I can say what worked for me. It started with love, honesty, and compassion - and we just took it from there day to day. If someone like me - successful at marriage - can't say what would work for YOU, how can these DIVORCED women? Every couple is different and they are simply trying to scam you out of your money. Please, take my advice and do not buy this book. Spend your money on dinner with your spouse to TALK about what would make your marriage a success instead.
|
