ITHAKA: A Daughter's Memoir of Being Found

Rating:
Summary: Get over yourself...
Review: I'd have to agree with the reader/reviewer, linda from sarasota, fl. Though well-written, I find this author dreary, selfish and overly affected by her small life. As an adoptee, I've heard every story possible regarding meeting or attempting to meet birth parents. I'm disappointed that the author couldn't have portrayed a stronger, more sensitive and giving person through this ordeal. It's a shame that the story happened the way it did...what a wonderful reunion this could have been for all concerned. Instead, the author portrayed herself as a 'stalkee' and then had to emotionally beat herself up and everybody around her through the entire ordeal...and a ridiculous 3-year ordeal it was! I stuck with this book through the end because she didn't actually reveal the 'reunion' until close to the end; however, I was relieved to finish the book, so I could be done with poor Sarah's journey.

Rating:
Summary: For anyone struggling with finding one's identity
Review: Ithaka, as the title suggests, is the powerful story of a life journey, in this case Saffian's foray into the uncharted territory of discovering and reshaping her concept of identity. While anyone who has an interest in adoption might naturally gravitate toward the subject matter, this is a book for a more universal audience; that is, anyone who has grappled with the age-old question: Who am I? What makes this book so tremendously effective, however, is Saffian's ability to share her confusion with candor and probing introspection rather than whininess. There is struggle, but no self-pity. Saffian tells her story with indelible clarity and refreshing honesty as she strives for, and ultimately achieves, a sense of hard-won self-awareness. The beauty of this narrative is that the author never loses sight of the subtle value in the lessons she learns along the way. She seems to realize that while there are no easy answers to profound life questions, just asking the questions gets us closer to what we're seeking. An exquisite examination of what makes each of us both unique and part of something larger.

Rating:
Summary: Dazzling
Review: This is simply one of the best books of recent memory. In place of the self-involved, self-centered ramblings of the typical memoir, Saffian gives us a complicated story about people wrestling with elemental problems: family, loyalty, loss. And even though she is at the center of that story, she does a marvelous job of making everyone else in the book as real as she is. The title is well-chosen, since the book is suffused with an almost Greek sense of the way life entails coming to terms with your destiny -- in Saffian's case, the sudden and unexpected appearance of her birth parents. This is a book of uncommon maturity and seriousness. I've read it twice now, even though I have no special interest in adoption, and I thought it even more impressive the second time around.

Rating:
Summary: Take your vitamins.......it's tiring and dreary
Review: I wanted to love this book and I wanted to give it to some of my friends who are adopted and have had a similar search. To be honest, they all did it better and in less than two years of vascillating! I have faced cancer, divorce, deaths of child, mother, brother and business partner with less pathos than this young woman needed just to pick up a phone and call her parents! I just don't get it! My friends who have gone through it did it better and I'm encouraging them to write about it in a more tangible manner. I felt the author was wimpy and torturous in her journey and also extremely selfish.

Rating:
Summary: insightful
Review: I heard Sarah Saffian on NPR and was so impressed with her poise that I decided to pick up the book, even though the topic did not interest me at first. While I occasionally find Saffian's writing style to be a bit overwrought, on the whole I am impressed with her telling of the story. Saffian is exactly my age, and frankly, I can relate to her moments of melodrama--trying to adjust to post-college life was challenging enough without meeting birth parents! In this telling, Saffian and her family members are not "good guys" or "bad guys," they are just people struggling to make connections. I think ITHAKA offers good insight into human relations in general--Sarah's reaction to being called out of the blue is instructive to (for?) anyone.

Rating:
Summary: A captivating, emotion-filled book
Review: Although I'm not an adoptee, I was touched deeply by this book. Well-written and well-edited, ITHAKA brings out not only issues (as best as I, as an outsider to the topic, can understand them) for adoptees, but also insightful thoughts on families in general. Ms. Saffian paces her story effectively and she demonstrates tremendous courage with the telling of it. As well, she provides an inspiring example of independence and thoughtful reflection through the delicate, dynamic balance she appears to ultimately build between the people who love her and her own need for solid ground and security. A tremendous page-turner, and one which I would quickly recommend to anyone interested in better understanding family relationships.

Rating:
Summary: Ithaka is absolutely riveting!
Review: I loved this book. Saffian's strong narrative voice kept me completely engrossed. Her realistic depiction of adoption and the reunion process will be helpful to countless members of the adoption triad or anyone interested in exploring identity and family.

Rating:
Summary: Recomend for all who are affected by adoption
Review: This book had a huge impact on me. Being an adoptee, I identified with her struggles as she faced the conflict within herself. My sister who is also adopted gave this book to me for Christmaas. I recommend this book for anyone who is adopted, is a birth parent, or has adopted a child.

Rating:
Summary: I'm a fellow adoptee and I can't relate to this book.
Review: I found this book to be drawn-out and the author's views to be slightly presumptuous. The recurring theme of pushing away the birth family gets old quickly, and the book takes on a whiny tone. Certain aspects are over-dramatized. After seeing Saffian at a book fair, I wanted to relate to this book, but found the author's focus on herself to be smothering and alienating. On the positive side, Saffian is successful in not jumping to one side of the fence or the other in the open/closed records debate. While she wasn't sure she wanted her birth parents to find her, she also seemed to be at peace with them by the end of the book.

Rating:
Summary: Saffian explores the many meanings of family
Review: I find Ms. Saffian's account of being found to be a fascinating look into the mind of a young person whose identity was in flux, whether or not she was aware of it at first. She opens the dark drapes of the closet of adoption secrecy, shedding light on the notion that one can be "related" to other people in many different ways. As a birthmother, this gives me hope that more people involved with adoption will be able to find a place for each other as Sarah found "a place" for her birth family in her life.