Rating: 
Summary: A great book
Review: I can't say I know how the author feels but she truly helped you to understand. I read through all the reviews and pretty much all the 4 and 5 stars are right on the money. Unfortunately, those who reviewed with harsh criticism to the book obviously don't realize there are thousands of personalities and situations that make everyones life journey unique to them. I applaud her for being so courageous in writing such intimate details of her life and sharing it with the world. While many will not relate to her story there are countless ones that will. To the author...good luck in all your future endeavors and congratulations on a wonderfully written biography!
Rating: 
Summary: Could associate at times....
Review: I found my self really not able to put this book down from the start to the end. As an adoptee I understood where Saffian was coming from when she was talking about certain feelings, but when she said she had an abortion, I couldn't believe it. As an adoptee I would never have had an abortion, and now help other women in crisis pregnancy situations by volunteering my time as a counselor. I thought it was cool that Saffian's birthparents found her, but can understand why she "freaked" out a bit because she had a good life with her adoptive parents. I didn't have a good life with my adoptive parents but believe they did the best they could. So I needed to find that missing piece to the puzzle, so I searched and found my birth mother. We met last year, and the reunion is moving slow which at times is good, but hard. I really did associate with Saffian having difficulty with relating to her birth parents, because it is like you are related but you don't really know them. Overall I found the book very informative, and would recommend it.
Rating:
Summary: Non-custodial Parents Can Relate, Too
Review: I had no idea how strongly I would relate to Ms. Saffian's experiences, and those of her birth parents, when I bought this book. Having been the non-custodial, summer-visit parent of my daughter since she was 2 years old, the birth parents' letters resonated loudly with my own feelings. Ms. Saffian's reaction to their desire for a relationship reminded me of many of the thoughts and feelings my daughter shared with me over the years. This book isn't just for adoptees and those who have given them up, it is also for non-custodial parents and the children who grew up in a one-parent home.
Rating:
Summary: This is the best book about adoption!
Review: As an adoptee who just found her birth mother's name and address, Sarah provides a accurate and realistic protrayal of the complicated feelings and experiences. I felt like a was reading my own journal when I was reading this book. This book was long overdue.
Rating:
Summary: Revelatory Insights Into How We All Compose our Identity
Review: This book is a rare gem. Insightful, honest, funny and heart-rending. I read it in one night and have gone back again and again. I've been giving it to all my friends. It is not exclusive to the community of individuals who have been touched by issues of adoption. We all consider our identity at one point or another and Ithaka is a road map for everyone. Enjoy!
Rating:
Summary: Not only about adoption, also growing up;Saffian not spoiled
Review: I think that anyone who has been confronted with sudden, unexpected information about their family will be able to identify with Saffian's account of her search for self-stability, a search which in this case involved dealing with her feelings about her adoptive and biological families. To say that Saffian is "spoiled" or "ungrateful" here is to miss the point: the book is a description of her personal journey and feelings about that journey. Why insist that there is a one "right" way to react to this experience? Some people would react differently were they in the same situation, but the point of a personal memoir is that they're not in that situation: only the experiencing subject can write down his perception of the situation. The world is filled with all kinds of people who have different reactions to different situations, which is what makes life interesting.That said: another thing that Saffian provides her audience with is a sensitive account of how therapy and self-discovery can work, which provides the important additional information that therapy is not only about finding out the truth (say, about how one has been damaged), it is about recognizing difficult truths about yourself. Saffian found out that for various reasons, she felt the need to control every situation (a feature of her personality that contributed to her hesitation to meet her birth family), a trait that had got her ahead in life but that also was interfering with aspects of her happiness. She needed to work on herself in order to make herself able to meet her birth parents. That is the true success story here and the fact that finally shows that she isn't spoiled and ungrateful; in the process of these changes, she learned about herself and tried to improve herself. This book is written very much in a twentysomething conventional style, which is a matter of taste; some people don't care for it, but I like it very much.
Rating:
Summary: Powerful Read
Review: I've read most of the reviews listed about this book and was annoyed by several of them which criticized Sarah's "spoiled" lifestyle and "selfish" lack of response to her birthparents. I am also an adoptee, adopted through the same agency as Saffian. I was also raised in Manhattan by a well-to-do family. I have had access to my birth father's whereabouts for several months but haven't felt right about contacting him yet. It may take me three years to write the letter or make the phone call. But if it does, so be it. There is nothing wrong with waiting until I feel ready, just as there was nothing wrong with her going through her process. "Itaka" is a beautifully written book about the range of emotions Saffian went through before, during and after her reunion. In my opinion, it's a must read for for all members of the adoption triad.
Rating:
Summary: An eye opener!
Review: As a birth mother AND an adoptive mother,this book let me understand the feelings of the adopted child. I found my daughter 6 years ago and I have not met her at this point. We do write letters and emails, but have never talked on the phone or met in person. This book helped me to see how difficult this process is for the "found" child. She hasn't known anyone but her adoptive family and it is very hard for her to accept me and my family. I am sending her a copy of this book for Christmas. Thank-you, Sarah!
Rating:
Summary: Wow
Review: This book struck such a cord with me as myself and Sarah Saffian are in the same situation - birthparents who ended up married to each other after the adoption. Very well written and interesting to see how another had coped with "being found". I could see so well where she was coming from.
Rating: 
Summary: Fascinating story; self-indulgent storytelling
Review: I began this book with enthusiasm and interest, taken with the story and with the author's writing style. I quickly became dismayed by the fact that should couldn't seem to see outside her own relatively negative feelings about being found by her birth family. The fact that she waited over three years to meet them amazes me. In particular, I found her statement that she owed them nothing well, repulsive. What does any child owe his or her parent? It can easily be said (and often is) that we didn't ask to be born... the conclusion being that we have no responsibility for being here and none to those who brought us into the world. But in fact, if it was not for the Leyders, Ms. Saffian would not have had the family and life she cherishes. I would suggest that if the scales are ever balanced that she does indeed "owe them". Frankly, I was amazed that the Leyders would have the patience and forebearance to wait what must have been a difficult three years. I was hoping that the epilogue would show the author's worldview had widened to better understand her birth parents and their decision. Instead, the focus seems to remain on her and her very self-indulgent feelings. It made me wonder if the Leyders had ever regretted making their call.
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