Rating: 
Summary: FAMILIES MATTER!
Review: Barbara LeBey's book will prove useful for anyone who wishes to build and nurture healthy family connections,whether estrangements have occurred or whether togetherness and compatibility are unquestioned. The book clearly states both sides and goes straight to the core, is well researched and organized,the writing style lively and straight forward. "Family Estrangements" would be particularly beneficial as recommended reading for young couples who are in the beginning stages of forming bonds with future or new in-laws. I wish it had been here for me when I was a new bride, but as LeBey says, "Never give up!"
Rating: 
Summary: another mother-in-law
Review: Because I face a similar situation, I was particularly interested in the chapter in which Ms. LeBey described her estrangement from her son. What the readers who complain that the book is one sided don't understand is that her daughter-in-law, like mine, has never given a reason for her anger. How can you correct a problem if that problem is not identified? No matter how willing you are to examine your own behavior, it is impossible to do so when your daughter-in-law refuses to explain the reasons for separating you from your son and grandchildren. After many years of trying to establish communication, I finally came to the same conclusions as Ms LeBey did, my daughter-in-law simply wanted full control of my son. I had done nothing to cause the problem and I cannot do anything to remedy it. What makes Ms LeBey's book so special is that she recognizes that there are conflicts that don't fit the normal descriptions. Cutting off a controlling, abusive, or addicted parents is completely understandable, but cutting off your parents, ending what always appeared to be a warm loving relation without explanation is not normal or acceptable.
Rating: 
Summary: Estrangement is on its way
Review: Estrangement is on its way if you follow the advise from this book.
There are really great books if you need help with your family:
1) Toxic Parents by Susan Forward
2) If you had controlling parents by Dan Neuhardt
3) The family crubicle
and many more.
Rating:
Summary: Right On
Review: EXCELLENT and long overdue. Very grateful to LeBey for identifying the haunting, tormenting, mystery of how and what often happens that destroys a once loving family. Also contains ways to cope and hopefully overcome the searing pain of separation.
Rating:
Summary: Help is on the way
Review: Family Estrangements is a must-read book for anyone who is on the "receiving end" of an estrangement. The author offers compassionate and wise advice, heartfelt true stories as illustration of this painful family problem, and personal knowledge of the devastating effects of deep rifts within the immediate family. LeBey's book is a wonderful tool for both understanding how the breaches occur and what to do to mend them. Above all, she articulates the need not to remain stuck in the problem, not to play the blame game or bemoan the issue, but rather, to put one's efforts and energies into the mending and healing process. To that end, LeBey focuses on the family member or members who have been hurt by the estrangement and who want to reconnect with their loved one. She has purposely, therefore, told the stories from the perspective of those most affected by the problem and in need of the most help--it is they who must learn how to reach out and try to reconnect, because the family member who has created the estrangement has deliberately chosen not to mend the rift. Which is why the two "readers from Atlanta" whose comments are posted here, make no sense in their judgment of the book. LeBey makes it quite clear in the early pages of the book why she chose to focus only on the stories from the aggrieved parties' points of view. It has served her well, and I am sure has helped the tens of thousands of people who have bought this book.
Rating:
Summary: Help is on the way
Review: Family Estrangements is a must-read book for anyone who is on the "receiving end" of an estrangement. The author offers compassionate and wise advice, heartfelt true stories as illustration of this painful family problem, and personal knowledge of the devastating effects of deep rifts within the immediate family. LeBey's book is a wonderful tool for both understanding how the breaches occur and what to do to mend them. Above all, she articulates the need not to remain stuck in the problem, not to play the blame game or bemoan the issue, but rather, to put one's efforts and energies into the mending and healing process. To that end, LeBey focuses on the family member or members who have been hurt by the estrangement and who want to reconnect with their loved one. She has purposely, therefore, told the stories from the perspective of those most affected by the problem and in need of the most help--it is they who must learn how to reach out and try to reconnect, because the family member who has created the estrangement has deliberately chosen not to mend the rift. Which is why the two "readers from Atlanta" whose comments are posted here, make no sense in their judgment of the book. LeBey makes it quite clear in the early pages of the book why she chose to focus only on the stories from the aggrieved parties' points of view. It has served her well, and I am sure has helped the tens of thousands of people who have bought this book.
Rating:
Summary: I did not like the book
Review: I could not relate to the blaming of one side. What I looked for was real help and I do not see a way to save a relationship by blaming other people.
A cooperative approach to problem solving would be desirable.
Rating:
Summary: Thank You, Amazon, for sample pages
Review: I don't know if a reader of sample pages only is allowed to write a review, but that's all it took for me to see that this author is of no use to someone on the lookout for coping advice in my situation -- the terrific pain that results from finally having to end an abusive family relationship to save my own sanity. Le Bey starts right off by making it clear she sees family estrangements as the "down side" of the 20th century's movement toward individual rights, and characterizes sibling splits as "arguments over who got grandmother's silver." If a writer on this subject wants to be taken seriously, her first few pages had better acknowledge that some people's family relationships, even without beatings or incest, are made hellish by forms of mental cruelty and disordered behavior that would be considered grounds for divorce (and possibly court-ordered therapy) in a marriage situation. I cut off all relations with a relative after years of bearing with such behavior, for the last seven of them insisting fruitlessly that my relative agree to try professional counseling before we met again face to face. This has been indescribably painful, and I am sure I am not the only person who has struggled for years to understand and cope with horrible behavior before deciding to separate from it. (I can only imagine what is endured by relatives of people who repeatedly tax their family relationships with criminal, addictive or similar catastrophe-creating conduct.) I have gotten much comfort from books that help me gain perspective on the causes of the behavior I endured and I can always use advice on how to cope with the experience of having no family. What I don't need is to start reading a book on estrangement that all but accuses me and other "leavers" of being selfish on the first few pages. I hope my estranged family member never gets hold of this book -- I can hear the crows of self-vindication already.
Rating:
Summary: What a shame!
Review: I read this book the first twenty pages but threw it right away, becaus I could not stand the blaming and constant negative attitude.
Rating:
Summary: Real Help for Real People
Review: I recently had a problem with my daughter. I was very upset and frustrated. I looked at my shelf of self help books. Dr. Phil always tells you to change but doesn't tell you how. He just says DO it. Barbara LeBey gives you real solutions to real problems, and lets you know that things can't always go your way. It was an enormous help to me and my daughter. I would recommend this book to anyone with a family problem. It doesn't have to be enormous, mine wasn't a true estrangement, but small things can grow. Ms. LeBey lets you know that you aren't alone and she gives concrete do-able advice. I have read the other reviews of this book and can't help feeling that a couple of them were written by the author's 'evil' daughter-in-law. Who else would become so angry at the content of this book?
| 
