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Summary: God inspired the truth in this book!
Review: As a recent newlywed, my husband and I have had quite a rocky time of it so far. I had reached the brink of myself as I could see my marriage dying, when really it hadn't had all that much time to grow. My husband wanted out and I didn't see to be able to change his mind no matter how I tried. In this book, I was encourage and discouraged to read so many situations like mine, but then I read about a simple principle to free my husband from the behaviors that were trapping him in our marriage. I even felt more in control of who I am and the overall situation. Amazingly, within just a few days, he began to respond to me again and seek truth from the Lord. I have never read a book that changed the course of my life so drastically. While we are not completely through our struggle, I did find "new hope for families in crisis." Praise God!
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Summary: Sound and practical
Review: Dobson's premise of tough love, which essentially means defining and maintaining the line of respect around yourself, seems sound and practical. Applying it avoids the drawn-out, torturous emotions that go with living in a decaying relationship. Dobson makes the seemingly radical recommendation that people facing infidelity or other marital crisis of similar proportions precipitate a crisis to bring the situation to a boil. Dobson's point is that that boil will very often restore the relationship. Precipitating the crisis shows your mettle, which commands respect and even admiration.
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Summary: How to love when it's not fun
Review: Dr. Dobson deals with another everyday issue that many of us don't know how to deal with. How to say no to the ones we love. I read this book when I was dealing with an unfaithful wife. Everything I had said hold on to her and "force" her to come back. Dr. Dobson recommended giving freedom since in the end no one can force another into staying in a relationship. He also deals with rebellious children which is basically the same thing as a wayward spouse. Sometimes NO is the answer. Yes you have the freedom to act that way but NO I will not tolerate you acting that way toward me. Yes you have the freedom to leave, but, NO I will not be here when you get back. Yes you have the freedom to commit adultery, but, NO I will not stay married to you if you choose that route. Yes you have the freedom to stay out all night, but, NO you cannot live here and continue to practice that behavior. A lot of the advice Dobson gives is common sense, that some of us can't see! ! when we are in the middle of those emotional situations that require us to think logically. I highly recommend this book.
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Summary: Excellent!
Review: Dr. Dobson feels like a friend throughout the entire book. The book is pure common sense, advice we would more than likely give to those we love when we see they are headed down a destructive path but when we live it, it seems our emotions take over and we lose sight of these wise words. I loved this book because of the plan he gives you in order to respect yourself and others to bring those you love closer to you and most importantly making you feel good about yourself when your heart is broken and you feel nothing but despair, this book offers guidance, a plan and hope. I feel in reading this you instantly gain respect for yourself but you need to keep reading it and seriously live it. Its tough. I am single and dating and this book relates mainly to spouses but it totally applied to me, my life and my circumstances in a relationship I was in. My mantra is something I took from this book and I tell myself and friends constantly "CONFIDENCE IS KEY". Th! is book is a must have, it truly offers healing of the soul.
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Summary: Get the book - before you NEED it!
Review: Goes beyond marrage. SOLID book on human relationships. If you are instinctively an "easy going" person, but a situation(s) forced you to be in charge, manage, supervise, or "be the adult" you need this book. In many ways it goes against the grain of what the experts think, but its based on common sense, which really aint so "common" when you think about it :)
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Summary: This book is EXCELLENT.
Review: Having wanted to avoid the situation that my mother went through, I have searched books, magazines, and basically analyzed every bit of information I could about inter-personal relationships. Here, I believe I have found a gold nugget in the midst of a lot of psycho-babble and bad advice, considering the fact that it actually WORKS.
Please read The Rules to better understand my point.
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Summary: it worked exactly the first time
Review: hi.. a month ago my boyfriend broke up with me.. to cut this story short, i tried to get him back by looking like a wet dog... but when my friend told me about this book.. i followed every word it said and applied it with prayer of course... in 4 days,the table was turned and he came back in tears wanting to have me back.. on the 5th day, we were happily together...all his reactions during the time of my silence was exactly how the stories came about in the book...
however, i want to know if this will still work the second time around?.. he broke up with me again and i am very miserable.. please please help me...
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Summary: This book is the answer i have been praying for..Thank you!!
Review: How can i thank you for writing this perfect book to help guide me in the direction the Lord has lead me in. I have already been lead thru prayer to start the tough love that you suggest in your book although i wish i could have read it before deciding to seperate with my husband.I have listened to the tapes and can not believe how perfect they are for my and i was at a point that i had stood firm with tough love and then was reconsidering if i was to tough or should reconsider, even though i realize that i could not with any respect for myself and that our relationship would have just traveled down the same destructive path we had already gone. I needed a guide and the funny thing is that i was beginning to regain the respect when i broke and began to hold on to tight and at that moment lost his confindence again.Tonite i listened to your tapes and realized that this is exactly the way the Lord was leading me before i took back the controls myself and lost battle be! cause i tried to do it alone. Thanks for your book/tapes you have helped me to realize the exact direction the Lord has lead me to go. And no matter what at the end i will have regained my respect for myself and God will lead me and keep me safe and secure and as long as i give him the controlls I WILL MAKE IT. He is so wonderful and i can not thank you enough for your confindence and help to rebuild my world. I think tonite i have never listened to a wiser and smarter man on earth then you. Thank you again and trust me people it is so worth it to hear this tape again and again thru your whole life.Even though my husband has only been unfaithful with words alone i can hope to now regain his interest before it is to late and it leads to more severe interest. Sincerely, Pat Zachary
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Summary: Tough Yet Great Advice
Review: I am so grateful that I read this book. It has sound advice and I wish that I had taken the advice months before. It is hard yet very reasonable suggestions on how to deal with a loved one who has chosen to leave. James Dobson has taken the time to explore all aspects of a broken relationship and what the victim can do to become a survivor and regain respect in a tragic life experience. I hope this wisdom is shared by the reader and the postive results mirror those found in the book. Thanks Mr. Dobson for your insight!
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Summary: great advice if you can get past the religious stuff
Review: I bought this book because the subject matter intrigued me. Even though I knew going in that the book was written from a fundamentalist Christian perspective (which did not appeal to me, being an atheist), I thought I'd give it a try anyway. I'm glad I did. Once you strip away all the religious mumbo-jumbo, what remains is very solid advice that is useful for everyone, single or married, in a stable or rocky relationship, Christian or not. Basically, what Dobson is saying is that relationships are founded on respect, and when that respect starts to erode, the relationship starts to disintegrate. If this disintegration hasn't progressed too far, the relationship can often be saved if the disrespected party starts standing up for his or her rights. I came to the very same conclusions myself after several bad experiences -- it's amazing how quickly someone's respect for you will skyrocket once you stop letting them abuse you. This should be common knowledge for everyone, but it isn't, and thus Dobson's book fills a valuable niche. It's too bad that there isn't a similar book without the heavy religious sermonizing; I think that a lot of people who could benefit from reading this book will be so turned off by this that they won't give it a chance. My suggestion: hold your nose and keep reading -- there's lots of good advice in here if you persevere.
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