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Summary: This book is not for me
Review: As parents, my husband and I get all kinds of advice from all kinds of people. We take some and we leave some. We are definitely "leaving" this. I realize that there are many acceptable ways to parent a child, but my training as a psychologist and my instincts as a parent tell me that the methods in this book are simply not acceptable. Stop and think for a moment. The ONLY way that an infant can communicate his or her needs is to cry. This book suggests that we should ignore our children's requests for basic human needs. Would we ignore a 3 year-old if he asked for food, simply because it's convenient for us? I certainly hope not. An earlier reviewer said that his/her baby cried for an hour the first night, and it got much better from there. Of course it did. The baby quickly learned that crying-- the only way that he could communicate--wouldn't get his needs met. Instead, he learned to just lay there and feel the discomfort of hunger, fear, or whatever it was he was feeling. I don't see how this sort of behavior can inspire trust between a parent and a child. My baby is going through a fussy period right now. My husband and I are tired, but we give our baby what he needs when he asks for it. When we signed on as parents, we knew that we would be frustrated and sleep deprived for a while. Parenting is not about convenience. Sure, we put him in his cradle once when we were particularly frustrated, and let him cry for quite a while. It was horrible. Tears were streaming down his face and he was choking on his cries. I picked him up, held him close, and he was okay. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that babies need warmth, touch, and basic human contact to feel secure. The authors of this book suggest that we should let babies "cry it out" and put them on schedules. These are very Western concepts. Other cultures carry their infants most of their young lives, and they do quite well. I wonder if the authors would suggest that we help our grade schoolers with their homework by sending them to their rooms and telling them to figure it out on their own. If you are struggling with your infant, as all parents do, consider something different. I love all of the books that Sears and Sears have written. Try them. They are written by people who clearly love children, take a positive, nurturing approach, and who have a knack for making you feel good about yourself as a parent. By the way, their methods will probably require more time and commitment on your part. But that's what parenting is all about, isn't it?
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Summary: Worked miracles with our TRIPLETS!
Review: Although this book came highly recommended from a friend who had used the Baby Wise method successfully to help their child sleep through the night, I didn't expect anything to work for my newborn triplets. My confidence in the author was boosted however when I read that he was the father of triplets as well! Before implementing the Baby Wise system our triplets were being fed "on demand", and as you might imagine, this resulted in our caring for them 24 hrs a day... Someone always needed to be awake. We implemented the Baby Wise system on a Monday... and by Thursday ALL THREE of my triplets slept THROUGH THE NIGHT! Our lives were saved! Once we put them on a schedule my babies were happier and healthier than ever. They slept better, they ate better and they quickly learned to soothe themselves. Some reviewers of the book have suggested that this method is cruel. I couldn't disagree more. In fact, I believe that making a decision to allow your child to experience a small discomfort in order to improve their life in the long run is what parenting is all about. This book will help get you started developing your lifelong responsibility.
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Summary: She's slept through the night since Week 5!
Review: This book has saved my sanity! I demand-fed my two boys and they didn't sleep through the night until they were 7 & 8 months old. I followed the guidelines in "Baby Wise" and my baby daughter has not only slept through the night since she was 5 weeks old, she is happy and content and goes down for naps without a fuss! Sleeping through the night is not just good for a happy Mom--it makes a well-rested, happy baby too! My baby is 4 months old now and has been sleeping from 8 p.m. to 8 a.m. since she was 3 months old. I also was not able to breastfeed my boys successfully, but she is nursing beautifully. Again, I believe this is because I demand-fed them, let them "snack", they didn't get a good, solid feeding each time, so they were continually hungry and fussy. As the book recommends, I always make sure she gets a full feeding and I am thrilled to be able to successfully nurse my baby this time! I was totally anti-scheduling with my first two, but with the results I have with my third baby, I am a true convert! Don't get this book for your sake, get it for your baby's sake. Everyone deserves a good night's sleep!
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Summary: Sleeping Like A Baby Since 10 Weeks Old & He Still Loves Me!
Review: This works! I think it is a great GUIDE for a new mom. I was clueless. I wanted answers. And I used the book as a GUIDE not as my Bible. You have to use YOUR best judgment when it comes down to it. It is completely natural to feel guilty about letting a helpless baby cry but when they are tired, they need to sleep! And when they are done crying -- they do sleep! I'll admit it was hard at first. I picked him up plenty of times. But he has been sleeping through the night and napping 2-3 times a day for months now! It makes for a happy mom AND baby! And he still loves and TRUSTS me more than anyone on the face of the earth. For everyone who condemns this book, I think you should use some good judgment (like we did) and realize that you just take what you can use from the book and leave it at that. And it still works!
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Summary: On Becoming Baby Wise
Review: I am ashamed to own this book. Mr. Ezzo does not take in consideration the needs of a baby. Babies have growth spurts and need to feed when they are hungery. It is neglectful to follow Mr. Ezzo's guidelines for feeding a baby under six months of age. Babies learn to trust their parents when parents respond to baby's cries and needs. Babies cannot tell time and will not learn to trust a parent who puts a baby on a schedule disregarding the baby's needs.
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Summary: Parents use your BRAINS and your HEARTS!
Review: Anyone searching for a manual of Christian parenting will please not stop on this book. There are many Christian parents who are appalled and quite frankly, frightened, by this method of child rearing. These are the facts about "Baby Wise": 1. It is not medically safe. Parent directed feeding has been denounced worldwide by physician groups and hospitals. Babies die from malnutrition and dehydration when this schedule is rigidly enforced. I don't care that Ezzo (who has no medical training) cautions against rigidiity - it simply isn't safe. 2. It isn't phsychologically safe. Mental health professionals are beginning to understand the detrimental ramifications of creating this kind of distance between a parent and child. Needs that go unmet in infancy and childhood have a liklihood of recurring with more dangerous proportions later (e.g., drug addictions, gang affiliations). No, I am not making this up. 3. Do NOT believe the given profile of parents and children not affiliated with this practice. The opposite of this approach, attachment parenting, does NOT advocate letting children rule their parents' lives or not disciplining children. It is a way of knowing and connecting to your child in such a manner that discipline is largely a matter of mutual respect and TRUST between a parent and child. Attachment parented children are not the spoiled brats that Ezzo would like you to believe. It is quite the opposite, in fact. 4. Ezzo offers no positive medical or phsychological rationale for his philosophy because none exists. This is parenting by convenience, but, unfortunately, children are by no means convenient. 5. This method "works" (babies do sleep through the night, eat, nap, and play on a schedule that makes life much easier, I'm sure), but that is because, like Pavlov's dogs, human beings are quite adaptable creatures. It is the emotional expense of this adaptabiltity that is frightening. 6. Christianity and "God's Way" of raising children has NOTHING to do with the contents of this book. Don't be fooled. This book is frightening, unsafe, and has the potential to become an epidemic if parents don't filter this information through their brains AND their hearts. Remember that your baby and child have no one else to depend on - don't desert him/her because you want a good night's sleep.
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Summary: How To Commit Child Abuse and Neglect
Review: This is child abuse and neglect. Most of the proponents know it is, too, or they wouldn't fill their reviews with phrases like, "who cares who says it's child abuse?" or "it is NOT child abuse." Penelope Leach doesn't have to have apologists for her thinking like that, now does she? This book is premised on the idea that there is a rivalry between parent and child, and that it is impossible to fulfil a child's needs -- even a newborn's needs -- without somehow causing deprivation to the parent. In fact, parenthood is an awesome responsibility, with enough fodder for conflict, without beginning your relationship with your child based on "teaching him who's boss." The practices urged by this book, which is not written by pediatricians or child development experts, deprives newborns and infants of essential parental contact and food, and creates a punitive atmosphere that is as unnecessary as it is cruel. If you really love your children, you'll turn to Penelope Leach, or the American Academy of Pediatrics or even Dr. Sears, for help on childrearing issues.
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Summary: Want to sleep through the night!
Review: This is an amazingly simple and short book that I have used with both of my children, ages 3 1/2 and 14 months. They both began sleeping through the night at 8 weeks and are still sleeping 10 to 12 hours a night. I have given this book to at least 5 people as shower gifts and they have all been skeptical but eventually grateful for the simple advise. The basic premise is wake up, eat, play then sleep - in that order. No where else did I receive such detailed advise on putting my children an a feeding schedule. As a nursing mother I was NOT nursing around the clock, but at scheduled times that were predictable. This book will bring you sanity and a good night's rest.
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Summary: Do your new child a favor. Buy this book!
Review: I write from the perspective of one who has used the methods in this book with two of my three children, and I would have used it with my first if I had known about it! The instructions in the book are very clear, and the authors themselves warn against extremes. They make explicit that rigid scheduling and to-the-minute feedings are not what they are promoting. Anyone with a degree of common sense can implement the principles contained in this book with profit. As for "doctors'" reviews, you may wish to refer to the three or so pages in the front of the book. Here you will find many endorsements of the book from reputable doctors. Our 10 week old daughter is enjoying 12 hours of uninterrupted, peaceful sleep every night, and she has been doing so since 8 1/2 weeks. Our experience with her now 2 year old brother was similar. It seems to me that this is beneficial for our child and far away from any type of "abuse." When our daughter is awake, she smiles and coos a lot and seems to be completely unaware of the abuse she is receiving. I suppose if I wanted to really abuse her, I would place an alarm clock in her crib. That way we could keep her feedings to the minute. But, we have opted to let her awaken on her own, the natural way. Our hats off to the authors of this sanity-saving book!
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Summary: Life-Saver for Parents of Twins
Review: My wife & I read Baby Wise when our boy-girl twins were 6 weeks old (and we wished we had read it 6 weeks earlier!) Esso gives good, practical, common-sense advice on how (and why) to get your baby (or babies) on a flexible schedule. This schedule then results in a happy, well-contented baby that will then learn to sleep through the night at approximately 8-12 weeks of age. The book points out that the key is the order of sleep, eat, wake-time. Like other parents we were putting the babies to sleep immediately after eating. After reading Baby Wise, we changed the order and it worked for us! Our daughter started sleeping throught the night at 11 weeks and our son followed suit a week later. Now they're 16 weeks old and we've even cut out the late-night (11pm) feeding and they sleep from 7:30 pm to 6:30-7:00 am. What a difference this has made in our lives! With twins, we were both utterly exhausted trying the demand-feeding style. My wife breast-feeds exclusively and I do all the shuttling/diaper changing. But our motivation wasn't just trying to get more rest for ourselves, Esso's approach just made sense to us. We also read Marc Weisbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child", and highly recommend this book as well. Weisbluth made us understand how IMPORTANT a good night's sleep is for a baby. "Baby Wise" taught us how to do it. Did our babies cry at first? Yes, they did. The longest our son ever cried was for one hour, the first night. The second night was 10 minutes, 3rd night 5 minutes. Our daughter really didn't cry much at all. Now, there's rarely any crying at all--just golden silence while they're sleeping. They also take 2-3 good naps a day, although nap consistency has been more of a challenge than the nighttime sleep. I'm amused at the "controversy" over this book and the attacks from the Attachment Parenting camp and the accusations of "child abuse". My opinion is that it is much more harmful to your children if they are chronically exhausted, (not to mention the parent's exhaustion) than a few nights of them crying as they learn to fall asleep on their own. All I can say is that our twins are happy, well-rested, above-average height & weight and still get all the love & nurturing that they need. If you're a parent of twins or more, I believe Baby Wise is a must-read!
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