On Becoming Baby Wise: Learn How over 500,000 Babies Were Trained to Sleep Through the Night the Natural Way

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Summary: This book has been so wonderful for us!!
Review: As new parents, my husband and I have greatly benefitted from this book. We know tons of families who have used this program and we have been able to watch these PDF children grow up to be the most well-behaved baby's/toddlers /and kids I have ever seen.As a former Nanny I have seen first hand parents who demand fed their children, and raised them in a "demand" sort of way- the majority of these children were whiny, spoiled brats who ran their household. The PDF children I know, who come from a variety of different types of families, are more patient, independent, well mannered and self reliant than any children I have ever seen. Seeing this evidence in these kids made we ask- "how did you train your children to be so GOOD all the time??" and everyone's answer was it started with Babywise. My husband and I have used the ideas suggested in this book and we have a very happy,well nourished, 3 month old son who sleeps 10 hours a night, is able to entertain himself during playtimes, as well as joyfully interact with us, and puts himself to sleep at naps and bedtime with little to no fussing and no sleep props. I am not saying that this philosophy of parenting is "how it SHOULD be done"- but in our personal experience and personal witness of other children trained this way, it is worth a read. Contrary to other review's- it does not promote ignoring your child or denying him what he needs, but teaches you to recognize his needs more accurately, in order to be a better parent. I love the fact that this author writes about welcoming your child into the family unit- and not centering the family unit around your child. Which happens all to often with Demand Parenting- baby calls the shots. babywise teaches moms and dads to train the children to be a part of the family, and not to revolve the family around the child. I love my son and am overwhelmed by the blessing that he is, and he is a humongous part of my life now, but he is not my entire life. i Think any mom or dad who is overwhelmed by constant feedings and lack of sleep and a general angst over " what am I doing?" would greatly benefit from this book.

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Summary: Great book for developing a wonderful baby!
Review: This book is great! Not only does it emphasize a schedule to help mom and baby but it also helps emphasize daily bonding time based on parent child interaction not bonding based on proximity of the parent. Many of the bad reviews of this book are high advocates of attachment parenting and feel that anything other than their way of parenting is wrong. I would strongly encourage all parents to read this book and the other "On Becoming...wise" books. They are a great parenting philosophy that allows the child to become a wonderful individual as well as a wonderful new addition to any family.

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Summary: Worked for me!
Review: If you have a newborn with jaundice or days and nights mixed up then Babywise is required reading. Do not read it before the baby is born. It will make no sense. Also, do not let moms and mothers-in-law read the book. It will make perfect sense to them as they have forgotten what it is like to survive on minutes of sleep at a time and will frequently ask you if you are "following the schedule". The authors are short and to the point which is good because so is your patience after three weeks of round-the-clock feedings. In fact, you will probably throw Babywise away once or twice because you are sick of their stupid schedules and personal antecdotes but hopefully, like me, you will retrieve the book before trash day.
The best advice I picked up from Babywise is that if your baby wakes up crying from a nap then they have not slept long enough. Peek through the door if you have to but let them work themselves back to sleep. One of my many mistakes was to run in during naptime and assume that because my baby was crying naptime must be over. I wish my sister-in-law had not thrown her Babywise book out. Her child is now ten months and is still waking up twice a night for feedings and comforting. I kicked that habit at 3 months.

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Summary: Conspirators giving this book bad ratings, read it yourself.
Review: I was totally exhausted with my baby's feeding every 2-3 hours and rarely sleeping more than a 2 hour stretch. I knew I needed help and checked out 4 books from the library on baby's and sleep problems. I recommend all of them, and especially On Becoming Babywise. It is truly a common sense approach. The other books that helped me are:
Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth
Sleeping Through the Night by Jodi Mindell
Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems by Richard Ferber

Before I read these books, when I was done nursing and tried to put my baby to sleep afterwards (at night time), he would immediately cry. I would then try to rock him to sleep... and when he was asleep put him in his bed... and he would immediately awaken and cry. I felt I was getting sick physically and also feeling terrible emotionally because I was very sleep deprived.

When he was about 10 weeks, I started implementing what I learned in this and the other books. He responded immediately without too much trouble. The hardest part was 2 nights in a row where I had to help him break the habit I had helped him get into of being fed every time he awakened at night. I would just soothe him, or change a diaper, etc. I got up a lot of times those 2 nights. But it paid off. Now when I put my baby to bed, he rarely cries and when he does, just for 5-10 minutes.

I weighed him weekly to be sure he was gaining enough weight even though I was no longer feeding every 2-3 hours around the clock. He is very healthy (even on the chubby side). I do not feed him when he cries in the middle of the night... I soothe him, but will not feed him unless he has slept 8-9 hours since his last feeding... newborn babies do need to be fed more often than that the first few weeks... be sure to follow the guidelines and not put them on that schedule before those first few critical weeks). He is also very happy... I hear everyday how alert and smiley he is for his age (which I believe is partly his nature, and partly habits which nurture him and help him be his best).

Dr. Ezzo's advice for helping your baby get on a schedule were very helpful. He suggests a flexible schedule (contrary to what the negative reviewers of his book say he says). My baby sleeps much better now for both naps and nighttime.

I truly don't believe his advice has put any baby in the FTP (failure to thrive) category. Babies need proper rest just like adults, which helps with their overall well being as well as very critical brain development.

The alarmists against this book are ignoring the advice of every single one of the authors of the books I read... and choosing to pay attention to only one author whose advice is different and possibly out-of-step with all the others (William Sears). Even the American Association of Pediatrics in Caring for Your Baby and Young Child say "Many babies cannot fall asleep without crying, and will go to sleep more quickly if left to cry for a while." I just wish I had known some of this information sooner.

I am now much more in tune with my baby's cries and what he needs. He is now part of a family that is more balanced than we were before reading this book. I was questioning if I was cut out for motherhood, but now I feel capable of having 3 or 4 children of my own as well as serving children in the foster parenting programs in my community. This book, and the others are just what new moms like me need since babies don't come with a handbook, and it's really not as easy as "mother's natural instincts" for most of us.

Also, if the claims some of these reviews make are true that Dr. Ezzo has been excommunicated from his church, I believe the claims are suspect. If the claime are at all true, any kind of church controversy would not at all be related to the wonderful parenting advice given in his book.

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Summary: You don't need this book.
Review: I heard great things about this book and thought I needed it to get my baby to sleep well. Not true. I did buy the book but didn't even read it completely. My (formula fed) baby ate every 3-4 hours and slept completely through the night at 8 weeks. Even after 3 weeks he only got up to eat and then went right back to sleep. I think as long as you establish a routine, you will be fine and do not need any books.

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Summary: Works like a charm as long as you are flexible
Review: When we followed the techniques in this book, our baby daughter began sleeping through the night at 6 weeks old. She is now 18 months old and I can count the number of times she has woken up during the night since week 6 on one hand.

There are 2 keys to success with this book, in our minds. First, follow your instincts. You need to follow the guidelines the authors set up, but you need to be flexible. Do not impose the rules with authoritarian rigidity. Instead, be willing to bend a little (and the authors, in fact, recommend this too). Second, be consistent. It might appear during the first several weeks that you are not making progress and your baby is not responding because you do not see any changes. Don't be discouraged! Keep at it! For our daughter, it was like turning on a switch. One night she was up during the night, the next she was down for 8 hours. After that occurred twice, she was sleeping through the night.

Lastly, the greatest benefit of the guidelines in this book is that they empower parents. For about the last 16 months, we have known what our baby's needs are because we have a schedule and have followed the guidelines. We gained confidence as first time parents to make good decisions. Now, as she has started walking and talking, we feel confident in doing our parenting and she responds well.

Parenting isn't easy, but coupling this book with your instincts will likely lead to a happy baby and happy, confident and rested parents.

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Summary: Works for Me!!!
Review: I have used the Ezzo principles for both of my boys (2 yrs. & 2 mo.) The first one took a bit longer to sleep through the night than the 8-week goal Ezzo prescribes. But 10 weeks is still within the suggested time frame. The second one slept through the night 8 weeks on the money. I think the key to the success of this program is to realize that these are PRINCIPLES, not hard & fast rules. A babysitter is supposed to follow rules. A parent is supposed to follow their intuitions. However, our intuitions can and should be informed by practical advice. And this book provides that advice. Instead of worrying about the specific time that my babies ate, I concentrated more on keeping the PATTERN in line: feed, wake, sleep. This eliminates a big part of the controversy surrounding this book: scheduled feeding. Ezzo himself says that if your baby is hungry, feed him. But he urges you to find out why your baby can't go 2 hrs. without food. Maybe it's a growth spurt, maybe he spit up too much of the last feeding. But most likely, it's because his routine was disrupted. I think as long as you stick to the routine of "feed, wake, sleep" you should have no problems getting your baby to sleep through the night. And as Ezzo claims, a rested baby is a happy baby!

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Summary: well written, but not for everyone
Review: I agree with all the other reviews, the book is helpful, but you need to follow your own instincts as well. The one key thing that Ezzo recommends is flexible schedules. A baby doesn't have a schedule for their first few months, and rather than putting my baby to bed when I felt he should sleep, I put his to bed when he needed it, and it eventually fell into a pattern. The first few weeks feeding were rough, especially with a baby that has reflux. But I paid attention to my baby, and learned to figure out why he is crying rather than offering him food every time. That was the most helpful advice from the book. Ezzo also talks about different stages that your baby will go through, and that helps as well. I learned for myself contrary to the book, that if my son fell asleep in the swing, or somewhere else for the first few weeks, it was alright. The most important thing was that he got the sleep that he needed. But by his fourth month, he learned that his crib was for sleeping, and things got much better after that. The point is, go with your gut. Follow advice that feels right, but if it doesn't, then do what does!

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Summary: So-so advice
Review: I read this book because it was recommended to me by several people, and was not impressed by Ezzo's advice.

When my daughter was about a month old, she was reluctant to fall asleep during the daytime, especially without what Ezzo labels as "crutches," like using a swing or a pacifier, and being a first-time mom, I thought she needed to be having regulated naps, which is something Ezzo advocates.

I gave his methods a try and wound up with a week's worth of scream-filled naptimes and a completely hysterical child. He recommends that you leave your child in bed during the naptime, regardless of whether your baby has fallen asleep or is crying, and says that sooner or later the child will fall asleep -- but not mine! For five days in a row, twice a day, (much longer than the standard three days he says it will take) my daughter screamed for over 45 minutes straight and NEVER fell asleep. It was a complete nightmare.

Following this mess, I decided that naps in the swing weren't the end of the world -- and seriously, about two days after I began to allow my daughter to sleep in her swing at times during the day, she began to sleep through the night. She started out sleeping from 11 PM until 4 or 5 AM, but she now goes to bed at 9:30 PM and doesn't get up until 6:30 AM.

More than anything else, you need to follow your own instincts as a parent. Although I'm sure my daughter won't remember the horrible weeks where I tried to force consistent naps on her, I will -- and I've learned to follow her cues better, but more importantly to trust myself first and foremost. We as parents spend more time with our children than anyone else, and we know more than we think we do.

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Summary: A great *guideline* but follow your instincts, too!
Review: I got this book about 2 months after my oldest son was born. Some say it works better for formula fed babies but my son was breastfed and it worked great. He was always a chubby baby, and maintained that look through this training. He thrived! The key in this book is the general "routine" that is endorsed. Eat, play, sleep, eat, and so on. My son slept through the night by 2 and a half months old, ate well, played well, and is overall a great result from using this book as a guide to your routine. Ideally you want the schedule to be a 3 hour cycle, but initially of course it is not as long since younger babies obviously need more feedings than older ones. That's fine -- use your instincts and adjust the schedule time as your baby's needs indicate. Many AP parents slam this book, but I think the trouble comes from following ANY book to the letter. This is a good framework with which to regulate your days, and instincts don't get ignored if don't want them to be. There is no advocation of starving your child for the sake of schedule -- depsite what many AP parents seem to think. It clearly says that by all means, if baby is hungry, feed him! My son started off eating every 1.5 hours, and we still used this plan within that time, he gradually worked up to 3 and then 4 hours per "cycle" as he grew.
This is NOT a book to read if you can't follow your gut, if you feel that any book has all the answers. There were certainly aspects of the text that rubbed me the wrong way, which I flatly ignored. But the gist was great -- get your baby used to a routine -- babies thrive on predictability, which is security to them. It also encourages you to learn the cries -- not every cry is a hunger cry and that can be a problem if you think you have to feed your baby every time he cries -- that can lead to discomfort for the baby and thus more crying.

The other thing that is controversial about this book is letting your baby cry at bedtime. Again, this is a highly misunderstood practice. You don't just close the door on your child, or his needs. You begin gently teaching him (when his physical age signifies readiness) that bedtime is not negotiable. You don't just abandon your child...you reassure him and soothe him but within a framework that teaches him that crying is not how we get out of going to bed. My son is now 19 months old and he rarely ever protests bedtime (which is somewhere between 7 and 8pm every night). He goes down happily, usually without a fuss, and wakes by 8am the next morning very rested and happy. He knows crying to get out of bedtime just won't work, so why bother. I truly believe this healthy sleep habit came about because of our "wise" use of the routine and sleep training methods explained in the book.

DO NOT follow any book to the letter. All books are skewed by opinions of the writers, and what worked for them may not work for you for whatever reason, yours or the baby's. But the framework and logic is sound, in my opinion, and adaptable to suit the needs of your household. One thing that I didn't like was the book does not encourage a lot of holding your baby -- I think that should have been emphasized more. Babies need to be held and loved on when they are awake, and since they are being taught a bit of independence in their sleep, there's no need to withold the affection in their waking time. Spoil them with love!!