Rating: 
Summary: It teaches what parents already know: that they're in charge
Review: I was searching through books about raising children, especially those who are ADD/ADHD and whose parents need that "something extra" to help them with the many problems they face. Luckily I found this book. It has given us the perspective and the tools we need to get and keep our child's attention, especially at the times when it is most important. It is short, concise and effective for any parent of any child.
Rating:
Summary: A Great Help!
Review: If you have young children (under 14) who 'talk back' to you, you may find this book to be of some help in undoing what can feel like a hopeless battle. My own 9-year old began talking back when he got into first grade, picking up snappy statements from TV and peers. I tried to excuse it at first as just the way modern kids talk to modern parents (I have offspring as old as 32, all boys, who never talked back this way). After deciding this really was unacceptable behavior, and recognizing that left unattended it was getting worse, I started taking steps to stop it. This book has been one of the aids (not the solution). It doesn't expect the parent to make a friend or equal of the child (rationalize, debate, etc.), but it also doesn't encourage setting up a dictatorship. As with many things, the solution to problems is sometimes in the difficult to maintain moderation arena, which actually requires more work by the parent. I like this book because it worked - despite being difficult to do at first, once the child gets the message, repeat performances are rare and easy to stop. The book itself is short and to the point, with just four simple steps to follow. They are common sense - I suspect most of us who have this problem will recognize them - but busy, often-stressed parents will appreciate the gentle support and reminders this book offers. 1) Recognize what is and isn't backtalk. (if it hurts, embarrasses, annoys you, its backtalk. If the child is just relaying his feelings about something, its an opinion) 2) Choose an appropriate consequence (unlike 'punishment', a consequence is a result that makes sense to the child) 3) Enact the consequence 4) Disengage from the struggle with the backtalker (don't take it personally, or you're doomed). Sounds so simple you want to click the "this review wasn't helpful button?" It IS simple -- so simple we forget, so simple it seems to good to be true. The hard parts of these steps are #3 and #4. No book can give you the solution, but books can offer help and reminders. There are details in the book that I still find helpful -- the backtalk has pretty much stopped -- all I have to do is remind my son now that "backtalk isn't allowed" and he immediately stops. In addition, there are short chapters for backtalk from Adult Children (!), from Children in College, for Single Parents specifically, and Backtalk in the Media. There is a bit of information on support groups and other resources (not a lot), plus ideas on starting your own support group, as well as a chapter dedicated to responding to people who disagree with the methods in this book.
Rating: 
Summary: VERY helpful book and easy to read! However,
Review: it is very rudimentary. I would like more emphasis on what's needed beyond insisting on respect. If the parents don't model respect for others and themselves, the child won't have any idea what it looks like. I have used the methods in this book successfully, but slightly modified for my 5 year old daughter so that she won't feel broadsided by consequences before she knows what's expected of her. I tell her first when she's nearing a boundary, and she's eager to learn the rules. This book DOES give concrete advice about what to do when it feels as if there's nothing you can do. I recommended it to any thoughtful parent who feels guilty about having to set limits.
Rating:
Summary: Teenager
Review: It was almost time for our daughter to get her driver's license. Her talking back and yelling at me was a scary thought with a driver's license in hand. So we went to a counselor and she recommended the book. I got the tape instead to listen to on my way to work. It was the first day of school, 1999, afterschool she was yelling at me, it was my chance to use a consequence for unwanted behavior. She was grounded, mad and it worked. She tests me still, but knows I won't tolerate the arguments and yelling. The tape gave me a weapon, and taught me it was up to me to change her behavior. Now we have that sweet teenage daughter most of the time. I don't have the concerns anymore of an explosive yelling episode, that were triggered over minor things. Good luck. A very happy mom.
Rating:
Summary: I'm buying another one!
Review: My mother (bless her heart) thought this would be a helpful book to work with my three boys on, so she bought it for me. It worked so well I recommended it to everyone I knew and then lent it to a friend! But, as the book is best used as a handbook you can refer back to whenever you need to, I told him to keep it and ordered another one for myself! My boys are 8, 6 and 2, and believe me, this book had it's work cut out for it! But it DID work! Try it! You'll see...
Rating:
Summary: Excellent, common sense methods that work!
Review: Our 12 year old daughter was totally disrespectful. We spent a lot of time lecturing and punishing her. Nothing worked and we were frustrated. This program showed us why she behaved this way and what to do about it. It worked perfectly just as soon as we started using it. All of our frustration and heartache is gone. Our friends and relatives noticed and were the first to tell us how wonderful the changes in her are. We're now genuinely proud of our girl! The four methods are easy to remember and use. They're not magic, they just put you, the parent, back in charge. Her grades, self-confidence, and ambition have also improved. My sister has used it too with her totally disrespectful 20 year old college daughter. Same excellent results, but, it's obviously easier to start when the child is younger. We'd rate this tape a 5.0 on a 4.0 scale plus gratitude for a changed life!
Rating:
Summary: Short, simple, specific and easy-to-read.
Review: Practical ideas for solving a common problem. Works especially well with pre-teens. Worth a read. I'd also recommend: Kid Cooperation (How to Stop Yelling Nagging and Pleading) by Elizabeth Pantley
Rating:
Summary: WHY THIS BOOK IS A MUST HAVE
Review: There are so many times when your kids seem to know exactly what to say to make you want to drive off a cliff and you don't of course because you love them. However, with this book and the knowledge you impart from it you can feel safe in your car again. For example, when your kid refuses to do anything you ask him to do (ANYTHING), or even communicate with you at all but will, however, talk in code to the other parent or parent surrogate what are you going to do? (i.e. something has to be done) Once you read this book you'll know exactly what to do. I do now, but I didn't then and the differnce is this book. From this book you can glean that the authoress took a lot of time to come up with her ideas and schemes and not only that, they work. My kids, and I have three of them of varying ages (I guarantee they are NOT triplets), are different now. For example, I picked up two of them from school yesterday (the other one rides the bus) and instead of shrieking at me as per usual, they remained silent, perfectly still. No what she calls "back talk" at all. That was a change (the no back talk part). And I believe it is because of this book about back talk that is causing me to feel grateful (finally). So many thanks to the authoress the result of whose work is this book. I learned that it's not worth it driving around wanting to drive off a cliff but never doing it (in terms of a metaphor). You learn, finally, that the "cliff" isn't the answer and you'll be glad you never considered it seriously. (Just like the donut isn't the real thing the overeater is yearning for -- it's something else. The donut is just the substitute for it). Thanks.
Rating:
Summary: Good solutions to a typical problem
Review: This book does give good step-by-step solutions to back talk. And if that's your only problem with your child it's a good buy. But for nearly the same amount of money I'd suggest the Perfect Parenting Dictionary of 1000 Parenting Tips - you get specific solutions to back talk - AND 999 other tips too.
Rating:
Summary: Very Helpful
Review: This book has been very helpful to me both with my children at home and with my students in the classroom. It has an excellent section on the effects of the media on behaviors of children. One thing that it did not emphasize enough, though, is that parents and teachers must earn respect from children--they are not automatically entitled to respect simply by being in a teaching position or by giving birth to a child. This program will not work for any teacher or parent who is rude, critical, sarcastic, hostile and/or disrespectful to children.
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