Rating: 
Summary: THE VERY BEST WAY TO COMMUNICATE!!!
Review: In reviewing this book, I would like to keep the subject matter as simple as possible. Even though it is a complex issue. I recently wrote a review for "Assert Yourself" by Sharon Bower.
And I have also written a review for "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. I am a caregiver for my eighty-year mother. She is a real sweetheart. And we are now great friends since her recent hospitalization. This book is for parents AND caregivers. But it has also been recommended
by many professionals for everyone to use. "How to Win Friend and Influence People" has hurt me badly. In communicating, I still find myself becoming manipilative. Don't buy it. Or buy it and see why I was hurt. "Assert Yourself" has an acronym
of DESC. D is DESCRIBE. E is EXPRESS. S is SPECIFY. C is CONSEQUENCE. Let's try it right now. When you vote against my
review (D) I feel bad (E) and I would appreciate it if you
would vote for my review (S) and then I will write more (C).
The book that I am reviewing has a much softer ring to it.
BEHAVIOR + FEELING + EFFECT. When you vote against my review (BEHAVIOR) I feel bad (FEELING) and than I don't want to write other reviews (EFFECT). I feel that, despite my earlier review, assertiveness training is aggressive. The approach of this book is beautiful. And it works not just with kids, but with everyone. Gordon calls it "owning your problem." You own what you feel 100%. In assertiveness training, you are spelling out the way
you want things to be. Active listening is also used in this book. It is not manipulative. You are simply echoing what the child or person is saying so that you both know what is happening at that moment. "You feel that this review is too
long." Or " You feel that this is a good review but you don't understand a lot of it." It works to do active listening. This is all only a part of what this book teaches in communicating.
I recommend it highly.
Rating:
Summary: An ex-child's perspective of P.E.T.
Review: My parents swear by P.E.T. They used its techniques with me when I was a child. I can't describe how nice it felt to be listened to, treated like an intelligent being, given the freedom to regulate my own behavior, to chose right from wrong and have credit for the outcome of my decisions (or to deal with the consequences). It taught me self-control. And it taught me that I control my behavior based on consideration for others, not because I fear punishment. Now, as an independent adult, that's the self-regulation that keeps me from commiting crimes or cheating others. I don't keep from doing bad things to others because I fear punishment (jail, being fired, etc.), I do it out of consideration for their feelings. I guess if I had to distill PET's message down to its core, it would be: Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you. Now that I'm an adult -- even though I don't have kids -- I've read the book several times and use the 'Gordon Model' with all my relationships. So does my girlfriend. Our relationship is the envy of all our friends. I like this book so much I just replaced my yellowed, dog-eared copy with the new 30th-anniversary edition.
Rating:
Summary: Life Changing. A Classic.
Review: Over the years, I have read dozens of child-rearing books. This is my favorite as it expresses a great philosophy and, more than anything, is immensely practical in what really happens in the day-to-day real world. Fantastic.
Rating:
Summary: Great tool for communication
Review: This book was a great tool in helping me communicate better with my kids. Using this book in combination with Adele Faber's "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk" and Matt Pasquinilli's "The Child Whisperer," I have developed cammunication lines with my children that I thought only existed on the Cosby Show.While I liked the book, it was denser and less fun to read than the other two books I mentioned. It was a nice suppliment but in order of ease of reading and ease of implementation, I would suggest you buy "The Child Whisperer" first, then Faber's book, and then this book.
Rating:
Summary: Great tool for communication
Review: This book was a great tool in helping me communicate better with my kids. Using this book in combination with Adele Faber's "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk" and Matt Pasquinilli's "The Child Whisperer," I have developed cammunication lines with my children that I thought only existed on the Cosby Show. While I liked the book, it was denser and less fun to read than the other two books I mentioned. It was a nice suppliment but in order of ease of reading and ease of implementation, I would suggest you buy "The Child Whisperer" first, then Faber's book, and then this book.
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