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Summary: Cassette tape was very good
Review: I really enjoyed listening to the tape. Jane speaks eloquently, confidently, and gives great examples. A great overview and informative tape when you don't want to or are unsure of buying the book.
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Summary: The most incredibly insightful book on parenting I've found!
Review: If you are a parent, this book should definitely be on your list of MUST-READs. The idea focuses on respect, letting kids have control over some of their decisions, letting them experience the consequences -- both good and bad -- and reducing conflict in your home. The book helped me see the problems in some of the traditional methods of "discipline" I had been using, and it changed my approach for dealing with two-year old son and our interactions. The book includes concrete examples and focus areas for positive discipline, and explores the long range goals for raising our kids (like what kind of people we want them to be in the end). Since I've started putting the positive discipline principles into practice, I've seen an incredible difference in myself and my son. I started asking for his help, and now he is doing all sorts of things for himself -- getting dressed, helping carry in groceries, and willingly climbing into his car seat (if you can belive it)!! He's so excited to be making contributions to our family on his own, and I'm enjoying him so much without so many tantrums. I've been teaching him about respect -- it sounds so silly, but he seems to understand that it's about treating each other like we like each other. Of course, it isn't the end of every conflict and we still have problems and short tempers sometimes, but it is over so much faster and with fewer hurt feelings on all sides. We're finding a nice balance -- not permissive, not authoritarian -- just respectful and fair. Even if you don't accept the premise of the book, I think it will challenge you to evaluate your own parenting methods. Be forewarned though -- it may seem a little unusual if you just skim through the book, because some of the ideas are unconventional or contrary to what we've been "taught" (like letting kids play during a time out session), but I belive it really makes sense in the end and I encourage you to read the whole thing. I STRONGLY RECOMMEND it to parents who want to reduce the conflict in their house, raise kids with a positive sense of self, and really truly find enjoyment in children.
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Summary: Too bad it doesn't work
Review: My wife and I took a parenting class in which the teachings of this book were espoused. We purchased the book and used it for the last year as a resource for disciplining our son, a cantankerous three year-old. All the principles and thoughts behind Nelson's approach sound terrific and I'm a personal believer in the power of positive thinking. It's just too bad that the techniques simply don't work.For example, the "teaching" and reasoning this book suggests are interpreted by our son as some kind of joke or a game. After explaining that hitting others is disrespectful, he responds with, "yeah, whatever. Let me hit him again." Bottom line: for the last year of using these techniques, his behavior has not changed. I can say this, though: he has high self-esteem--in being able to thwart his parents and get away with whatever he wants. A factor this book doesn't quite address is the element of time. Both my wife and I work and sometimes we simply don't have time to negotiate and explain things to our son. We need him to get up, brush his teeth, get changed, and eat his breakfast, NOW, not after we spend an hour explaining the virtues of good oral hygene. The other part of the book I found troubling is the implication that acting negatively to your child is bad parenting. I believe that for certain circumstances fear, control, and punishment are appropriate and effective ways to teach your child what's right or wrong. That is, fear, per se, is not necessarily a bad thing as long as it's tempered with love and support. I truly wished this book worked. Perhaps it's written for older children or perhaps my son simply doesn't respond to this type of approach. Just beware that if you have a young, "tough" child, this book may not only be useless, but may also make you feel guilty in the process.
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Summary: Positive Discipline by Jane Nelson
Review: The 'discipline" concepts in this book are refreshing! Why do we think that to teach our children how to behave, we have to make them feel badly? This book presents gave me a new understanding of why my children (2 and 6) misbehave. Then it follows with ways to work with my children to gain cooperation, through problem solving, family meetings, training and encouragement.
I was amazed what kind of results I could achieve when I was able to discipline in a way that was kind and firm at the same time and mutually respectful. It takes a lot of effort on the parents part to change but the outcome is worth it. I feel better and so do my kids!
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Summary: Great in theory!
Review: The author must be a saint
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Summary: Respect for the little ones
Review: This book helped me see discipline in a whole new way. It's true, children don't have to suffer in order to learn they have done something wrong. We need to have respect for the little ones just as much as anyone else, and that's sometimes hard to remember when you are angry. "Positive discipline" explains this concept well. The only problem is if you have very young kids, this book doesn't help much in terms of specific examples. Most of the examples are about children 5 and up. I would imagine "Positive Discipline for Preschoolers" would serve my situation better. I am buying that next and will write a review for it shortly......
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Summary: The best parenting book I have read!
Review: This book is a real gem. Our copy of the original edition is well loved and worn. Since it was recommended to us by our daughter's elementary school counselor almost 6 years ago it has been read and referred to many times. To me it was a parenting book that finally made sense and spoke to my heart. This book is based on the idea that everyone (including children) should be treated with dignity and respect. It is about HOW to use kindess and firmness at the same time. It is clear, practical and easy to read. Although the ideas felt right to me they were not the way I was raised and were awkward to put into practice at first. The effort was well worth it. It has transformed our family in very positive ways. It has made being a family fun. I have recommended this book to many, many friends and patients who have enjoyed it and been able to use it successfully. I whole heartedly recommend it to you!
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Summary: This is the book that should be read by every parent.
Review: This book is a wonderful resource for parents, grandparents and caregivers. It assists parents and other caregivers with the ideas and goals to be not only gentle, loving and fair, but to help children practice kindness and fairness. Every parent should read and keep a copy of this book for ready reference. It is a great shower gift, newborn gift or anytime gift. Every ob/gyn should give their patients this as required reading material. (The author, Jane Nelsen has SEVEN children---she speaks with kindness, gentleness and EXPERIENCE.) Once you start this book you will wish that every person involved with children read this book, too.
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Summary: a joke
Review: This book may be fine and dandy in theory, but it doesn't work. Want to raise a brat? Buy this book. Want to raise a kid who grows up to be an adult who can manage on thier own? Buy this book. Enough said. This book was required reading for a class I took at the University level recently, and after reading parts of it in the bookstore, I ended up not even buying it.
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Summary: A must read!
Review: This is one of the best, most useful parenting books I have ever read. I am a child and youth care worker and I use these concepts with the kids I work with. I've taught them to parents who are really struggling and they've seen major improvements in their relationships with their kids, as well as the kid's overall behaviour. The book focuses on how to interact with your kids in a way that emphasizes firmness merged with kindness. It shows you have to treat your kids with respect, give them choices and a degree of control, the meaning of consequences, and manage conflict. The truth is punishing kids does NOT work, and discipline and punishment are NOT synonymous. I really liked the concrete examples in the book. I wish that the author had spent more time on how to determine your child's mistaken goal, and she had addressed more clearly how exactly to find the time for family meetings and the like when you are a family with two working parents. I also appreciate that she teaches parents to think long term. I have to admit that the ideas in the book may seem simplistic at first read. You have to remember (and Nelsen stresses this repeatedly) that changes won't occur overnight. But if you stick with it you will see a difference. I would reccommend reading it once, trying to apply it for 3-4 weeks, and then reading it again. It is written in a conversational style, so it is a quick read. I got through it the first time in a weekend. I refer to in frequently to remind myself of certain ideas.
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