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Summary: Recommended by an excellent support group leader...
Review: I discovered this book when I signed up for a divorce support group. The group leader, a brilliant and wonderful woman, said that it was her "bible." She carried it around with her so that she could open to any page at any time and find help and comfort. I immediately bought a copy at Amazon.com and found that I too carried it with me in my handbag, kept it by my bed at night, etc. Every time the pain came, and it was often then, I opened to any page and found comfort and help. I am also a support group leader and have recommended it to others since then. This book is written with a rare combination of intellect and soul and warmth. The complex is presented in a caring way that's accessible to all readers. If I could recommend only one book for a broken hearted person, it would be this one! Should I ever need need this help and support again, it's a comfort to know the book is in my library.
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Summary: Rebuilding Takes Time
Review: I learned more from Bruce Fisher's REBUILDING book than I learned from any therapist. He gives simple, straight-forward word pictures that are vivid, clear, and memorable. Each week I lead a discussion group of about 30 people (ages about 35 and up) at our St. Louis West County Singles group and I have recommended the Bruce Fisher Book more than any other because it gives a complete picture of stages one goes through in getting on your feet and back on track--and it emphasizes the stumbling blocks along the way to new freedom. I often refer to key points presented in this book. I tell people in my discussion group and when I give talks, there are MANY books that address topics important to the REST of your life, but the FIRST book you should read is this one by Fisher.
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Summary: I'm on my fourth reading and highlighting of this great book
Review: I was given this book by someone who valued it in their recovery and I have given it to many others for the same reason. It is so right on about the recovery process that it is amazing. I have read it three times and highlighted in three different colors. I get something different out of it each time--depending on my recovery stage. I have other self-help books, but I always come back to this one! It doesn't matter if you've been in a relationship for two years or twenty-one years (as I was)--the process is the same. Buy it!
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Summary: THE book to read if you've lost a love relationship.
Review: I was lucky & found a 12 week class using this book in 1994 when I was separated. It was unbelievably helpful in learning about myself, my marriage, my estranged spouse. It was the light at the end of the tunnel. It revealed the path through the grief & pain and to the other side. I would recommend this to anyone who is suffering from the loss of a love & needs to let go.
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Summary: Good reading on how to survive the loss of a love
Review: I'd recommend this book if you are going through the pains of a lost love, esp, where it was not your idea to end it. Perhaps nothing but time can really help, but I found it helpful to understand the process I had to go through, and the book some what of a comfort.
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Summary: Excellent, helpful, and Very practical
Review: I've just finished this book (2nd ed), which was the text for the seminar of the same name. I highly recommend it! Very practical building blocks to work through, and take you from the beginning where you are. Helpful to anyone who is experiencing the loss of a relationship! Also, get the workbook to go with it! Best yet, attend the seminar in Colorado!
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Summary: Excellent! This is a must read for everyone!
Review: If people would read this their relationship might not end. If it has ended...this is a tremendous way to get back your life!
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Summary: Gotta have it!
Review: If you are trying to re-build your relationship and you need some help, this is definitely the book of choice. My girlfriend and I read it together and gained some real insight on relationships! Good Luck,
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Summary: Rebuilding When Your Relationship Ends
Review: In its third printing, this book is a self-help manual for those trying to recover from a divorce, or going through the process of divorce. The first thing I noticed about Rebuilding is the feelings that surface during this trying and stressful period of your life are identified. When we are really suffering, it is hard sometimes, to analyze what we are feeling. Is it pain? Depression? Self-hate? All of the above? It is comforting to read that you learn we are not alone in our pain and confusion and that given the circumstances, the turmoil you are experiencing is quite normal. As each emotion is explored, the reasons for them are also examined. An example from another who has suffered the same misery is given, then the best part--what we can do with and about those upsetting, hurtful and sometimes hateful feelings that want to pull us under and drown us. For example, Chapter 7 looks at the two, " . . . very strong feelings which accompany the trauma of divorce--guilt and rejection. Advice given is to do a self-examination. Do we need to learn new ways of relating to people? Do we realize that feeling rejected is a part of ending any relationship? It's normal. It's natural. There is nothing wrong with us. Whew! If you are the one leaving the relationship, you are probably feeling guilt. You don't want to hurt someone you do or did love. However, say Fisher and Alberti, "To end a love relationship may be appropriate because it has been destructive for both people." Leaving can be a good thing for both people in the relationship. The chapter continues to describe the emotional cycles the "dumpers" (the one ending the relationship) and the "Dumpee" (the one being rejected) go through. Fisher and Alberti acknowledge not everyone is going to react the same, but no one escapes the pain. No matter how we are affected, though, we must remember guilt and rejection are tied to feelings of self- worth and self-love. Build up these two areas and we will be less devastated by life's inevitable rejections. And how do we go about building our self-worth. Chapter 11 tells us how to go about that. The end of each chapter has a "How Are You Doing?" section. A list of questions will help us think our way through our dilemmas and offer ideas with which we can rebuild our lives. I like this book because it forces us to do something besides sitting around feeling sorry for ourselves. There are ways to work through relationships that end, and we have the power and the tools to do it. We don't have to feel helpless. I like this book because it acknowledges we are not alone with our feelings. There is light at the end of the tunnel. We can go on to live a normal, happy life. It gives us hope. Bruce Fisher, Ed.D., (1931-1998) was the founder and director of the Family Relations Learning Center in Boulder, Colorado. He was a divorce therapist, author, teacher and a clinical member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. Robert E. Alberti, Ph.D., is a psychologist marriage & family therapist, Fellow of the American Psychological Association, clinical member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and author/coauthor of several books. A 287-page volume that demands us to do some work, but it is well worth the effort.
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Summary: This book helped me alot.
Review: It made me realize I was not the only person who felt and acted in a certain way when my marriage ended. We all have the same reactions and emotions. The steps to rebuilding your life make sense and should be followed.
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