Reviving Ophelia : Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls

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Summary: Much needed discussion muddled by political rhectoric
Review: The topic of the book is extremely important. The objective of the book - understanding the challenges of adolecesents was right on track. The author uses case studies to illustrate the various catagories of problems and situations facing the subjects. Unfortunately, the author blames the bulk of the problems for young girls on society. The bottom line is a call for the government to fix the problems, the very problems that left leaning influence has brought our country. This call for reform is from an author that is herself a left leaning feminist. I had hoped for more help as a parent on how to help growning girls adjust, the author offered little hope that parents could do much. A dissapointment.

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Summary: Must reading if you have a girl in your life
Review: I'm an aunt, not a mom, but desperately afraid for the well-being of my nieces. This book confirmed my fears but also offered some ways out -- mainly, through adults really listening and supporting girls as they move into and through adolescence. I gave my copy to my brother. This is an eye-opener for all adults, especially men. Read it

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Summary: Informative, encouraging, and downright frightening.
Review: While reading this book, I found myself smirking at certain passages and saying "Damn! It wasn't just me! I wasn't retarded/stupid/ugly/! I was perfectly normal for having the emotions I had when I was in junior high". I was relieved, let me tell you. I'm afraid for young girls growing up now because things are even worse than they were when I was a kid. Girls are constantly subjected to images that try to keep them from being genuine, intelligent, strong women - and that's sad. The whole thing makes me angrier than I could convey without making you think I'm a psycho. Pick up this book, and read about the effect "lookism", MTV, and song lyrics are having on the next generation of women. Read about 11 and 12 year old girls having to deal with being sexually harassed at school, peer pressure to drink or do drugs, having sex/getting pregnant, and deal with the world around them while trying to separate themselves from their parents and find their own identities. It will open your eyes. It opened mine.

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Summary: Some Good Points
Review: As the title says, Reviving Ophelia does make some very good points (such as how the media feeds girls false images of beauty), but my biggest problem was how the book acted as if all girls become total headcases once they hit 13. I'll admit that my teen years were far from pretty, but you got to give girls a little more credit than that.

Rating:
Summary: Informative
Review: My younger brother had to read this book for a class of his, and after he had read it for his class, I snuck it into my room so I could read this book. When I read this book, I noticed that Mary Pipher had stated that women's voices are silenced. What the? If our voices were and still are silenced like she says, we wouldn't have gotten the right to vote or wear pants. Although she does state that America is a girl-poisioning culture, she fails to realize what would have happened if feminism never existed. As for the case studies, Cindy's is the one I relate to the most. Although my parents aren't drunks like hers are, I have been ignored a lot in my life because of my disability. Basically, Pipher does offer some good points, but she acts like women haven't done anything for America, which of course, is not true.

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Summary: A Devourable Read
Review: Mary Pipher's Reviving Ophelia came to me as assigned reading for a college psychology class. As I thought, "Oh, great. Another author who thinks she can connect with teenagers when, in fact, they are simply connecting with a book deal" I was hooked as I began reading. The theories Pipher presents are well thought out, sound, and explained with antecdotal evidence that makes the book seem more like a novel than a nonfiction. I finished it in one sitting, believe it or not. Essential to any psychology enthusiast, and, as I believe, to parents of girls. Don't cheat yourself out of this one- you'll regret it if you do.

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Summary: Reviving Ophelia..one of the most inspirational books
Review: A book of inspiration, answers, and heart touched writing, Reviving Ophelia by Dr. Mary Pipher is a moving book that will motivate young girls around the world. Through out this book the battle is between society and "Ophelia" or Dr. Pipher, to put a stop how the media personifies beautiful, and how this strict definition of sexy destroys young teenage girls; this battle is found to be proven in 50 real-life stories exemplified by the author's real life patients. These patients have ranged in age from 11 to 21 and the topics are from violence and abuse to rape and eating disorders. This book proves how society causes young girls to go into rehab, or to go see therapists. The book shows the growing epidemic of teenagers experiencing emotional and physical problems coming from the negative messages our culture sends out to women about weight and beauty. In Reviving Ophelia, Dr. Pipher explains how the domination of females is a direct result of social pressures to be beautiful and sexy rather than intelligent, independent and self reliable. A comparison is made to Ophelia who, as a girl, is happy and free but loses herself in adolescence because she falls in love with Hamlet and lives only for his needs and wants. Rather than being independent, Ophelia strives to meet the demands of her loved one; her self-esteem is based only on his approval. This analogy to Ophelia represents every girl out there, she is this universal teenage girl who desperately battles these struggles of self ridicule and exceptance of a man. Dr. Pipher continues through the book showing how media and our culture causes overweight people to look pass their attributes and their how this pressure also causes bulimia and anorexia. The author of the book brings a new light to definitions in which culture has defined them. Sexy is intelligence, the way you carry yourself, you confidence, and being your true to who you are.

After reading this book, and being a very insecure myself I highly recommend this book to all teenagers, even adults. It was such a breath of fresh air to feel as if someone finally understood the pressures one faces, especially when being over weight. Wwhen media displays all these girls who all are 2 pounds, you feel as if, if you don't look like this you aren't beautiful. My favorite part in the book was with the patient Geena. She was a clarintest, and she was smart but overweight. On her first day of middle school a kid called her fat. Then after she went home ignoring all her talents but just focusing on the fact that this kid who did not know her, did know who she was, her abilities, judged her on her weight. This book is an intense, easy to read, and motivating book, that should be read by all girls, who need that little boost to feel an ounce of security.


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Summary: Reviving Ophelia & My Experiences
Review: I opened Reviving Ophelia with an open mind. As a 17-year old high school junior, I am usually turned off by books that my mother and teacher enjoy. This one, however, was much different. Immediately, I was pulled into the book. Maybe it was because I realized that I am one of the girls Pipher is talking about; I am Ophelia. I doubt if I was a boy or even a father I would be very interested, but because it pertained to me directly I was pulled into the reading. I could relate to each and every one of the "characters" in one way or another. I felt for these girls and their problems, and each and every one of them contributed to the book. I don't think I've ever read a book before and was able to just say "Yes! I know exactly what you are talking about!" It's nice to know that there are actual studies done on teenagers; that someone would think to take the time to figure out what it is with teenagers (girls in particular) that make us the way we are. Mary Pipher's main thesis is practically the life of every teenage girl out there, including myself. It makes me realize that as a young teenage girl, I am not alone. By reading this book, I have learned that society just expects boys to be able to handle more on their own and be more independent than girls. That is just an assumption made by many. As to if it's true or not, I couldn't say because I am not a boy, I have no brothers, and I have never read a book about the lifestyle of a teenage boy. A lot of girls today no longer have the support behind them telling them 'You are not alone'. The author's tone was very sympathetic and understanding to the girls, and she told each story with a personal glimpse behind it. It's almost as if Mary Pipher had known each and every one of those girls for years. Each tale of the unique girls had a conflict and resolution. Throughout the last third of the book, a lot of the girls' problems had to do with their relationships with others. Boyfriends, moms, dads, and siblings were all common topics. Some of the girls that I read about were so interesting that I wish I could read more about them. Mary Pipher has established a theme that growing up as an adolescent girl is not easy. It's challenging, confusing, scary, and exciting all at the same time. Adults sit back and watch us run and fall, and they have to step back and let us get up on our own. We won't learn anything by not falling, but there comes a point when the last time you fall and you feel as though you are never going to make it back up, an adult is needed to lend that hand and pick us back up. Pipher calls it "girl-poisoning". Girls are pushed to be someone they aren't; do things they don't want to do; and be happy doing it. There is media, sexism, feminism, and raging hormones that are everywhere. Throughout this book, these girls' tales have been completely real and un-cut. They tell it how it is, and then Pipher explains the psychological aspects behind what they feel and think.
One of my favorite phrases in the book was, "Ophelia died because she could not grow. She became the object of others' lives and lost her true subjective self." (Pipher 292) Ophelia is from Shakespeare's Hamlet. In Hamlet, she is a free and happy child who loses herself at adolescence. When she falls in love with Hamlet, her only objective in life becomes living for his approval. Torn apart by her efforts to please both her Hamlet and her parents, she loses the fight when Hamlet rejects her for being a compliant daughter. Beset by grief, and without any inner direction, Ophelia drowns in a creek, weighed down by her heavy and elegant clothes. Pipher uses the title Reviving Ophelia in reference to bringing back what died inside Ophelia- that adolescence innocence. Is it really possible to bring back a self that you lost? And if you did bring back that self, would it be the same thing? Mary Pipher is posing the question, What can we as a society do to help adolescent girls grow without losing their self? Maybe if we all read Reviving Ophelia, answering Pipher's question would be that much easier.



Rating:
Summary: Reviving Ophelia & My Experiences
Review: I opened Reviving Ophelia with an open mind. As a 17-year old high school junior, I am usually turned off by books that my mother and teacher enjoy. This one, however, was much different. Immediately, I was pulled into the book. Maybe it was because I realized that I am one of the girls Pipher is talking about; I am Ophelia. I doubt if I was a boy or even a father I would be very interested, but because it pertained to me directly I was pulled into the reading. I could relate to each and every one of the "characters" in one way or another. I felt for these girls and their problems, and each and every one of them contributed to the book. I don’t think I’ve ever read a book before and was able to just say "Yes! I know exactly what you are talking about!" It’s nice to know that there are actual studies done on teenagers; that someone would think to take the time to figure out what it is with teenagers (girls in particular) that make us the way we are. Mary Pipher’s main thesis is practically the life of everything teenage girl out there, including myself. It makes me realize that as a young teenage girl, I am not alone. By reading this book, I have learned that society just expects boys to be able to handle more on their own and be more independent than girls. That is just an assumption made by many. As to if it’s true or not, I couldn’t say because I am not a boy, I have no brothers, and I have never read a book about the lifestyle of a teenage boy. A lot of girls today no longer have the support behind them telling them ’You are not alone’. The author’s tone was very sympathetic and understanding to the girls, and she told each story with a personal glimpse behind it. It’s almost as if Mary Pipher had known each and every one of those girls for years. Each tale of the unique girls had a conflict and resolution. Throughout the last third of the book, a lot of the girls’ problems had to do with their relationships with others. Boyfriends, moms, dads, and siblings were all common topics. Some of the girls that I read about were so interesting that I wish I could read more about them. Mary Pipher has established a theme that growing up as an adolescent girl is not easy. It’s challenging, confusing, scary, and exciting all at the same time. Adults sit back and watch us run and fall, and they have to step back and let us get up on our own. We won’t learn anything by not falling, but there comes a point when the last time you fall and you feel as though you are never going to make it back up, an adult is needed to lend that hand and pick us back up. Pipher calls it "girl-poisoning". Girls are pushed to be someone they aren’t; do things they don’t want to do; and be happy doing it. There is media, sexism, feminism, and raging hormones that are everywhere. Throughout this book, these girls’ tales have been completely real and un-cut. They tell it how it is, and then Pipher explains the psychological aspects behind what they feel and think.
One of my favorite phrases in the book was, "Ophelia died because she could not grow. She became the object of others’ lives and lost her true subjective self." (Pipher 292) Ophelia is from Shakespeare's Hamlet. In Hamlet, she is a free and happy child who loses herself at adolescence. When she falls in love with Hamlet, her only objective in life becomes living for his approval. Torn apart by her efforts to please both her Hamlet and her parents, she loses the fight when Hamlet rejects her for being a compliant daughter. Beset by grief, and without any inner direction, Ophelia drowns in a creek, weighed down by her heavy and elegant clothes. Pipher uses the title Reviving Ophelia in reference to bringing back what died inside Ophelia- that adolescence innocence. Is it really possible to bring back a self that you lost? And if you did bring back that self, would it be the same thing? Mary Pipher is posing the question, What can we as a society do to help adolescent girls grow without losing their self? Maybe if we all read Reviving Ophelia, answering Pipher’s question would be that much easier.

Rating:
Summary: Indepth and Insightful
Review: I felt this to be an interesting read as a way of helping to improve myself and the way I feel society puts expectations onto me. In passing, a philosophy teacher said that he recommended every woman read this book, so I did. I did find many explanations as to why I acted the way I did while I was growing up. My poor parents were just completely at a loss dealing with my apparent moodiness and behavior problems.

This book is relevant to our young women and their parents. In a culture where we are trying to understand what is wrong with everyone, this helps people see that maybe it's the large mass of people that is wrong, not the individuals themselves. Our young women are starving, unhappy, and losing their identies because we, as a male driven society, expect them to become just another housewife, or a face in the crowd. If even a few young men were required to read this book perhaps they would be slightly more sympathetic to their sisters, mothers or lovers. This could lead more young men to actually care about their partners wants, needs and desires regarding the direction they want their lives to take.

It should not always be an expectation that women are meant for the servitude of men. I believe this lets in some light to people who are in the dark regarding women's issues. It reminded me of my reading of the "Feminine Mystique" because of the repitition of the question "Who am I?" Pipher proposes that young girls know what their dreams are but somehow lose it in order to maintain popularity and fit in to the "young lady" standards. I really would recommend this to any woman who is tired of feeling insufficient or questioning their reason for being.

Parents of any teen aged or preteen girl should read this because they could see their precious daughters point of view on various issues. My parents are currently working on reading the book together because I told them that it would explain a lot of what I was going through on levels they weren't able to understand. Thank goodness, I was their first and last daughter to go through the dreaded "teen age" years! They are still coping with my brother and are praying for it to be over soon.