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Summary: New Thoughts On Spanking
Review: The previous position we outlined on spanking in the book "Parenting With Love and Logic," unfortunately, was our thinking as of 1990 when the book was written. Since then our knowledge has grown. The world we live in changed, and we have developed new techniques that are far more effective than spanking. For the record, our present stance on spanking is: 1. There is no need for spanking. 2. Spanking is counterproductive. It makes the adult into the "bad guy" instead of the bad decision becoming the culprit. 3. Love and Logic techniques are far more powerful than spanking. 4. Most kids would much rather have a spanking than have their parents use Love and Logic techniques such as delaying the consequence while the parent thinks over the problem, developes a clear head and then locks in the empathy before telling the child what the consequence will be. 5. Since we now have such better techniques, why even consider, or waste our time with, spanking? 6. A considerable amount of solid research is now available indicating the harmful, counterproductive results of using spanking as a disciplinary tool. These six points, plus others, would make up the content of a chapter on spanking if we could write the book again, or if Pinon Press decides to update the book.
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Summary: Reasonable and realistic information for parents
Review: I was very pleased with this book. The authors give helpful techniques to use in child-rearing. It teaches a child responsibility by allowing them to experience uncomfortable consequences but not dangerous ones. No shouting, no constant reminders, just natural consequences. A good common sense approach.
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Summary: Stop enabling: Teach responsibility with love and logic
Review: This book provides sound parenting philosophy and easy to use guidelines to apply it. As a teacher, it is clear to me which students have been raised with loving and logical parents. So many parents confuse love with protection. Parenting with love and logic means allowing your kids to make choices ... and sometimes mistakes. Some may object to the "Basic German Shepard" tactics or the idea that claims that spanking is sometimes alright. Use what you wish from the book. I have never spanked my child, nor do I order him around like a dog. To avoid a power struggle with my son who didn't want to put on his clothes or coat for a 5 minute ride home from my sister's house, I used Love and Logic principles. On a cold January evening in Michigan I carried him to the car in his underwear. Moments later, he said, "I'm cold." I simply kept driving and said, ... Perhaps next time you will make a different choice?" A natural instinct would be to cover him up and protect him from the cold. He was not injured in any way. By sticking to the principle, however, he learned two very important lessons: 1) mom is not kidding around, and 2) it's smart to wear your clothes and a coat. Since that evening, we have not struggled to get dressed. Try it!
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Summary: why spanking
Review: I think many of the techniques in this book are worthwhile. I was shocked, however, to find that the author advocated spanking, qualified it with an age restriction, and added rules to follow - one of which is "spank only if you can do it in a painful way". There are many ways of removing a child from a situation to teach them what is unacceptable, or dangerous, behavior. There are usually reasons for the behavior. Often they are just having trouble communicating. As a parent of an almost two year old I couldn't imagine ever hitting my own child. I can't think of anything it would teach him except that hitting is okay.
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Summary: A year and counting
Review: A year after our introduction to Love and Logic, my husband and I are firm believers. But I didn't start out that way. It seemed too easy, and at times, too harsh. I was reluctant to try what seemed to be pat answers to vexing parental challenges. But, after putting the principles into practice for a very short time, a little bit at a time, we saw an amazing improvement in our 6 year old son's behavior and self-esteem. Letting him experience the consequences of his actions while offering much love and empathy was a much better teacher than our lectures, tirades and punishments ever were. I would also suggest that parents of toddlers listen to the Cline/Fay tape: Toddlers, which applies the Love and Logic principles to that age group, and Parenting Teens with Love and Logic.
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Summary: Parenting With Love and Logic
Review: The book contained some good solutions for the problems encountered while raising children. However, some of the solutions are more idealogical rather than realistic. As is usually the case with advice given by other people, some of the advice is good and should be followed and some of the advice is not good and should be ignored. It is up to the parent to determine which of the solutions are practical and which are nonsense. For example, letting children suffer the consequences of making bad decisions without parental intervention will not always work. Letting children go to bed late one night will not cause them to always go to bed on time after that. They will continually stay up late, sleep at odd times and therefore, be constantly tired and grouchy.
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Summary: New age of parenting
Review: This is a great book, and sort of bible for parents looking for answers in this new age...I've tried techniques (based around self sufficiency) like these for years, and had great luck with 3 kids (2 sons, 10 and 14; and 5 year old daughter) and as a sort of guide for advice in a book I co-authored recently, entitled, The PC Dads Guide to Becoming a Computer Smart Parent--a human guide to parenting in the computer age. The theme of having kids take control of their own lives hits a universal cord.Parents of all stripes will like this book.
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Summary: Absolutely fantastic! Don't live without it.
Review: This books gives real solutions to real problems in a way that parents can utilize immediately. I'm lucky that I read it while my child was still a baby, but it will work for any age child. It may just take a little longer. I highly recommend it and I'm buying several copies for friends.
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Summary: Excellent common sense suggestions on positive discipline
Review: This book greatly improved our control struggles with both our 3 and 5 year old. The parenting pearls are step by step advice for specific hurdles we all encounter. I especially liked the idea of "natural consequences" for the CHILD'S choice.Love and discipline are both necessary to raise a happy, productive child.I loved the book however, I admit a few of the solutions seemed too manipulative for me although friends have tried them and they say they do work. Great commom sense for those of us parents who love our kids wholeheartedly but believe in parents being in control through allowing the world to enforce natural consequences.
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Summary: One of the best parenting books out there!
Review: I use Love & Logic both in my home and in my professional life as a therapist. It is an outstanding book that advocates parents being in charge, but only taking as much control as they need to. Love and Logic has also caught on in my local public school system! The school district offers free Love and Logic Parenting classes (with free dinner and free child care!) This makes Love & Logic Parenting information very accessible to anyone who wants it. Great Deal!
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