Rating: Summary: Additional Suggestion for Sensory issues Review: I found this book to be right on in many respects, but think the author should mention to parents of "Spirited" children, the possibility of SENSORY INTERGRATION DYSFUNCTION which can be tested for and TREATED! Symptoms of this dysfunction can include many of what this author describes, such as oversensitivity (to sound, smell, textures, etc) or excessively high activity levels. For your own sake, look into it as you may be able to get some of your child's issues eliminated and then only have to deal with what is left :) Many Pediatricians are also ignorant on this issue. Mine told us repeatedly that she was simply a "spirited child", yet after occupational therapy for our 14 month old daughter's senosry issues, she is a different child. Check out the book: "The Out-Of-Sync Child" by Carol Stock Kranowitz and Larry B. Silver. Best of luck!!!
Rating: Summary: Raising Your Spirited Child Review: My son has been diagnosed as A.D.H.D. & O.D.D. The advice/techniques in this book are awesome. His meds allow him to stay on task and complete projects and this book has helped us revamp our parenting skills to meet his spirited extrovert needs and end the power struggles and reduce tantrums. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is desperately trying to understand their child and his/her meltdowns.
Rating: Summary: Great Book Review: I was totally at a loss as to what to do with my oldest daughter. From about 12 months old on, I was constantly in battles with her. After reading this book, I had a better understanding of her 'spirit' and was better informed about how to work with her to get her to act within acceptable boundaries without dashing her spirit! It is a great read and full of tips to help the struggling parent of a spirited child!
Rating: Summary: A Positive Guide for Raising Your Spirited Child Review: From the point of birth, or as early as conception, did you recognize your child was "more"? Is his/her temperament more intense, more persistent, more sensitive, more perceptive, and are they more uncomfortable with change? Perhaps they are hard to get onto any kind of schedule. They may exhibit an incredibly high energy level. Their first reaction to anything new may be a rapid withdrawal or a resounding no, only to see them fully participate when warmed up. Are they analytical and always have a suggestion for change? Not all of the aforementioned characteristics need be present. However, if these sound familiar, you may be the blessed parent of a spirited child. I am not referring to a religious form of spirit. Rather, I am referencing a personality type. Detail and Insight Within the pages of Raising Your Spirited Child, author Mary Kurcinka assists the reader toward understanding what 'Spirited' looks like, and gives us tools to work with children whom fall within this spectrum. She brings to this publication professional and personal experience, explaining that the premise was birthed due to her own parental experience. In addition to writing this publication, Mary has helped numerous parents and educators via seminars, classes and additional publications. The term "Spirited Children" can be credited to Mary Kurcinka finding an appropriate word to explain, and in my case take the place of, the all too typical labels of: difficult, strong willed, stubborn, and so forth. Prior to reading this publication I used the word strong-willed, but grasped adoration for the word spirited, allowing it to become a positive replacement. This book is one that I initially devoured and continue to return for more indulgence. Quite simply, I gleaned much insight and greatly benefited from the read. My only regret is that I didn't hear about it earlier. In one section of this book we are encouraged to evaluate our child with regard to his/her nine different temperamental traits. These coping traits are placed onto a continuum from 'a mild reaction' to 'a strong reaction' or from high to low. She assists the reader toward embracing the fact that each person is unique, and that all character traits have positive aspects as well as negative. The content helps us to glean understanding of our child's natural reactions to situations, allowing us to become able to predict his/her reaction(s), and guide them toward exhibiting positive actions/reactions. In my view, this section, like the rest of the book, was extremely beneficial. Additionally the reader is encouraged to accentuate the positive in all children. One manner that this can occur is by putting aside negative labels. By putting a positive name onto a previously viewed negative label, you can modify how you and others perceive your child. This will enhance your child's strengths. Content within Raising Your Spirited Child assists you toward doing this and more. Instead of being picky, your child becomes selective. Instead of explosive, your child it dramatic. What about being perceptive instead of distractible? Mary provides wonderful techniques for diffusing intense reactions. She teaches us how to aid our children in learning to control their level of intensity. In Raising Your Spirited Child, we learn that the very persistence that fuels your child's ability to insist on wearing a swimsuit on a cold December day, can later be the weaponry for refusing drugs. Admire your child's persistence and choose your battles cautiously. Persistent children are committed, decisive, assertive, independent, capable, and achievers. The key here is finding your parental balance in the arena of authority. I firmly believe that children need to be respectful and well mannered. No child deserves to be controlled! We also learn that spirited kids are incredible perceivers. You are likely to be amazed by their funny antics, have heard intellectual statements from them, and been literally amazed at their observations. Very frequently the perceptive spirited kid can tell you that you are experiencing a bad day long before you would have realized this. Mary Kurcinka states, Spirited kids are like roses - they need special care. And sometimes you have to get past the thorns to truly enjoy their beauty." A most perfect epilogue! My View Many of the techniques Mary discusses are ones that we were implementing prior to reading this book. We knew there was something different about our daughter's temperaments. We also realized our parenting methods were not traditional. If only I had this book 12 years ago! Not only did this book confirm methods we were implementing, it gave us new strategies, and most profoundly: it allowed me to adapt a recommended motto - PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION. Both of my daughters are spirited children. It presents itself differently in both and is most obvious in my youngest. Mary states, "Being a parent, building a healthy relationship with a child is a never-ending process. There are good days and there are lousy days. With progress our goal we don't have to wait for an obscure finale." She further reminds us to rejoice in the times of peace and forgive ourselves for the times of frustration.
Rating: Summary: No quick-fix formulas, no guilt, no difficult children! Review: I heard about this book on one of my preschool message boards and WHAT A RELIEF! Our first child was calm, easygoing, etc., so when our second little bundle hit the planet -- what a shock! "Difficult." "Hypersensitive." "High-Needs." "High Maintenance." "Spoiled." "Sensory Integration Disorder." What else? People recommended massage, chiropractic adjustments, strict discipline, etc. etc. etc. We absolutely adore our daughter and realized early that she was just MORE. As soon as I started reading this book, I felt such wonderful relief to realize that we weren't the only parents struggling to understand and deal with our spirited child. And not much of a surprise to learn that I'm also a spirited parent. After the first few chapters, I noticed that my interactions with our daughter became much more relaxed and pleasant. One of the first big changes was our use of "time-out." You know, there are numerous articles about this subject, but this one really made sense. We've started teaching Belle that timeout is a place she can go just to cool off. Instead of the horrible demand, "Go to timeout," now I simply ask, "Do you think maybe you need to take a little timeout until you're feeling more calm?" This one little thing alone has made our days soooo much more pleasant.
Rating: Summary: the parenting bible Review: This is the parenting book of all time - a parenting bible. I have taught parent education classes for many years. I have recommended this book to every parent I have taught. It is not only for parents of spirited children - but for every parent who wants to understand who his or her child is. A must.
Rating: Summary: A must for anyone who has an intense child! Review: I have a very intense and gifted 3 year old. I have always known she is different, she is more sensitive, more perceptive, more presistent...just more than other kids her age. Before, I wondered why my child had to be so "difficult" all the time and was it something I was or wasn't doing as a parent. The littlest things would get her upset - If I closed the door or turn of the lights before she could get to it, she would go crazy. I would have to change her outfit 4 times before we went out because her pant cuff didn't hang right or her shirt didn't feel right around the armpits (eventhough to me, it was so roomy I could fit my arm in there). It was torture to get her to transition from one activity to another. This book has helped me understand why my daughter is the way she is. It has improved our relationship and has helped me become a better parent to her. More significantly, because I understand how to parent her, she is much more happy, which makes me much more happy and relieved. This book IS THE BOOK to read if you have a spirited child! It has saved my sanity.
Rating: Summary: Helpful book Review: This book helped me see that all children have their own emotional make-up and each one needs parenting tailored for him or her. Even if your child isn't "spirited" (and I find the description a little clumsy) you will find yourself thinking about how your own child thinks and feels -- that's a good thing. I have found two other books very helpful. HOW TO NEGOTIATE WITH KIDS...EVEN WHEN YOU THINK YOU SHOULDN'T, by Scott Brown, really helped me think about how I deal with all the daily arguments and conflicts in our house -- a big help. And RAISING AN EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT CHILD, by John Gottman gave me a lot of insights into how to help my children develop emotional control and confidence. I recommend both.
Rating: Summary: Couldn't have found a better book for me and my child! Review: This book not only helps in identifying your child's behavior, but it gives you strategies to make sure that your child's uniqueness is transformed into the gifts that they are. A survival manual for every parent who wonders why their children are just MORE everything than other children.
Rating: Summary: What an Amazing Book Review: Since two year old daughter daughter was BORN, I thought I had done something wrong or caused her "neediness" and "demanding" nature. I have searched and longed for information to why she behaves the way she does. My husband at first would get very upset with me that I "felt" something was not right. Marisa crawled at 5 months and since then has zoomed through each stage. She has a VERY extensive volcabulary and amazes us every day with her analytical skills. Other parents we have met seem to even ENVY us because she is a charmer and very charismatic. We are very proud. As I go through each chapter I bring things up to my husband with the biggest smile and relief and say "Yes!!! That's it!".... Thank you, Mary, for giving our family peace of mind that our daughter IS a bright, loving, energetic child and not the hyper, difficult and demanding brat. (People don't think I can hear them) Ok, back to my book :)
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